I Decided to Let You Go (Completed Main Story) - Chapter 11
Natasha sent the startled Kayena back to her hometown for a while. Though it would leave her alone to endure hell, she still wished for Kayena to find some peace.
Back at the ducal residence, she soon began suffering from a fever.
“Hnnngh….”
Three weeks had already passed. Nearly a full month had gone by, yet there was still no sign of recovery. Her forehead remained as hot as a furnace, and dry coughs accompanied every breath.
Throat aching as if torn apart, Natasha reached out a hand. Her fumbling fingers accidentally knocked over a water glass. The powerless glass slid away and toppled, spilling water everywhere.
“Oh, ugh…!”
She gasped for breath. Endless thirst was interfering even with her breathing.
She desperately tugged at the bell cord, but no one came from beyond the door.
Just then, a series of firecrackers sounded from outside.
Startled, she cracked open her eyes. Through hazy vision, the calendar hanging on the wall caught her attention. Slowly moving her gaze, she finally made out today’s date.
Today was the Retiers Empire’s Victory Commemoration Day—the glorious day they seized the kingdom’s territory and secured a peace pact with the duchy. Since last year, the empire had held nationwide celebrations to honor this victory.
Even the ducal domain was celebrating, so it seemed all the servants had gone out to enjoy the festivities.
‘Ah….’
As Natasha realized what day it was, phantom voices began echoing in her mind. Faint from faded memories, a whisper spoke right beside her.
‘Why are you the only one who survived?’
‘Are you happy, surviving alone while your siblings perished?’
‘Save me, save me… It hurts, it hurts….’
‘Cut off his head. Bring me the head of the enemy who killed me. I’m wronged, so wronged, so wronged. Why did I have to die?’
They were her family members.
Voices full of resentment for her survival, pleading for life, and demanding vengeance tormented Natasha endlessly.
“No, no, uh… Go, please… leave me… please….”
‘Do you remember?’
‘How we died that day.’
‘You wouldn’t know—you abandoned us! You ran away, fully aware!’
‘You ungrateful wretch! You forgot the kindness of those who raised you!’
She couldn’t block out the voices even by covering her ears. If anything, they clung deeper and heavier. They even grew angry, as if resentful of Natasha rejecting them.
‘The blade of vengeance severed my neck. Even after my head fell, my father writhed in agony from the overwhelming pain.’
‘It hurt as if a rotten apple had been planted in my heart! Shall I plant that apple in you too?’
‘As my beloved home burned, my body burned with it. The smell of charred flesh made me retch.’
Scenes she’d desperately tried to forget flashed through her mind.
That day, Natasha had quickly turned her head away from the horrifying sight before her. But the tragedy had already imprinted itself in her vision.
The crumbling fortress walls. Severed heads brushing against her feet. Grass soaked in blood and ashes drifting through the air.
And an unbearable, deafening silence.
Smelling the deep, lingering scent of blood through the cloth Sir Dante had draped over her, Natasha replayed it all in her mind—each unforgettable detail of her family’s and homeland’s demise.
‘I’m sorry….’
And whenever she felt like dying, she remembered.
She consoled herself that there must be a reason she’d survived. She believed her very purpose was to continue the Charlier royal bloodline.
But she had failed.
Though she’d borne fruit with the man she loved, it had all been a deception.
Their marital relations had occurred only on their wedding night—once and never again—leaving no time for conception. Bearing an heir now seemed impossible.
In the end, Natasha had failed to fulfill her family’s final duty.
‘Yes, you fool! You ruined this perfect opportunity! This was the kingdom’s only chance to be restored, and because of you believing in love…!’
Accusing voices echoed fiercely in her ears. Natasha kept pounding the blanket in distress. Thick veins swelled visibly on her neck as she groaned.
Save me.
Please get me out of here.
Natasha sobbed uncontrollably. No savior entered the room, no matter how frantically she rang the bell.
Only after fainting could she finally escape the nightmare. She fell into uneasy sleep, her forehead throbbing as if her heart had been transplanted into it.
While she hovered ambiguously between dream and reality, the door opened.
Muffled footsteps followed. The scrape of chair legs, then the sound of someone dropping heavily onto a seat right beside her bed.
‘Who is it?’
She couldn’t guess the intruder’s identity.
Her eyelids were too heavy to lift. Her fingers twitched feebly but couldn’t move forward. Every attempt to identify the other person failed.
‘It’s warm….’
Then, that person clasped Natasha’s fingers. Her restless hands, which had been tapping the sheets, suddenly stilled.
Even through gloves, the hands holding hers radiated furnace-like warmth. Her shivering hands and lips miraculously ceased trembling.
A damp cloth was placed on Natasha’s forehead. Powder—likely crushed herbs—was slipped between her slightly parted lips. Bitter beyond belief, yet undeniably effective.
“Tha….”
With the pain receding, her lips parted. Her vision remained pitch black.
“Thank you….”
She continued, gasping for breath. Speaking more was difficult, so she paused to swallow.
“You can… go enjoy… the festival now….”
Fireworks kept bursting outside. The days-long celebration disregarded day and night, allowing anyone to join at any hour.
Natasha hoped her life-saving benefactor would now go and enjoy themselves.
Hearing this, the man gave a hollow laugh. After a deep sigh, he muttered something under his breath.
“…Festival.”
At first, it sounded like he was merely repeating her word. Then he kept murmuring to himself in an even quieter voice, seemingly indicating no interest in the festivities.
So there are people who don’t enjoy such grand celebrations.
Strange… but thanks to you, I’m alive… .
Natasha mumbled inwardly, then lost consciousness as drowsiness overwhelmed her.
[This is the timeline separator]The next day, her body surprisingly felt much better. The herbal powder her life-saver had forced into her seemed to have worked.
She wasn’t fully well, but at least she could move without difficulty—which was enough. Aside from feeling limp as if soaked in water, movement came easily.
The servants, using the festival as an excuse, had neglected Natasha’s safety and well-being. As a result, she’d gone two days without food and was starving. She needed bread or fruit from the kitchen to calm her gnawing hunger.
After fetching and eating some food from the kitchen, her mind finally began to clear.
Seated at the table, she tossed the prepared divorce papers into the trash bin.
As long as the Emperor existed, divorce was impossible. She had to find another way.
A desperate plan occurred to Natasha as she pondered how to escape safely. Though the losses would outweigh the gains, it was still the best option available.
‘The Duchy would be better than a mad Emperor.’
Namely, cooperating with the Duchy of Kshant.
On that day, the Duchy of Kshant had retrieved the royal seal from the ruined palace and kept it safe. Transferring the royal seal to them would grant them full authority—but required royal blood as a condition.
Since the royal family had been exterminated, they likely assumed obtaining royal blood was impossible and had nearly given up. Natasha’s survival was their perfect opportunity.
They probably hadn’t approached her yet due to concerns about the princess’s non-cooperation and the ducal family’s reaction.
Offering terms first would increase the chances of securing an agreement, rather than waiting to be blackmailed later.
「I will grant you the chance to establish the Kingdom of Kshant.
Please rescue me and my people.」
To prevent misinterpretation, she kept the letter as brief as possible.
“Huu….”
Natasha let out a short sigh.
Now she would lose even her last remaining inheritance.
Once she relinquished the royal authority, her title and even the royal house would vanish into history, nothing but an empty shell.
But it no longer mattered. Escaping hell was the best choice.
She decided to have Sir Dante, who stayed in the annex, deliver the letter to the duchy. With constant surveillance whenever she went out, secretly making a two- or three-day journey was impossible.
Coincidentally, Kayena had business at the annex today, so Natasha sent the letter along with Sir Dante’s favorite snacks.
“Please handle this well.”
“Just leave it to me. I just need to give this to Sir Dante, right?”
“Yes, also whisper that he should deliver the letter to the Grand Duke Kshant.”
Kayena departed and returned to Natasha before dawn, handing her a note from Sir Dante as proof of successful delivery.
「Received.
However, it would be difficult for me to personally meet the Grand Duke Kshant as well. After crossing into the duchy, I will bribe someone to deliver it. The Grand Duke knows your ladyship’s residence; his reply will go there.」
Yet ten days passed without any reply.
Natasha sent another letter to Sir Dante. Kind-hearted as always, Sir Dante confirmed the letter had reached the Grand Duke and urged patience, trying to soothe her worries.
Now nearly half a month had passed. Sir Dante advised it would be wiser to interpret their silence as rejection.
‘Why on earth?’
Natasha couldn’t understand the duchy’s decision.
Grand Duke Kshant had devoted himself to preserving the kingdom, even after it was reduced to barren land. He hadn’t founded his duchy merely for honor or power.
There was no reason for him to reject an offer to transfer royal authority. Wouldn’t he prefer a complete kingdom over a half-formed duchy? Even reclaiming imperial territories would take time but was certainly achievable.
‘There must be… a misunderstanding. A definite misunderstanding. I must go to the duchy myself.’
Having even this last resort fail, Natasha grew confused. In desperation, she made the rash decision to meet the Grand Duke herself.
She hastily gathered her coat and gold coins, ready to step outside.
Just then, the door—unexpectedly, as no guests were due—opened.
“Where are you going, Princess?”
An unforeseen figure appeared.
Male lead first thought she played hard to get, only to realize she
really disliked him
Short intro:
What she can’t stand the most is the streets full of effeminate men, especially that so-called top beauty whom she avoids at all costs.
Shen Yaoxing looks at Jiang Mingyue, who keeps approaching her with coy shyness.
Shen Yaoxing: Bro, don’t be like this, I’m really about to throw up!
She fears nothing in heaven or earth, except for him getting close to her.
*
At first he thought she was just using the trick of feigning indifference to attract his attention. Later, he learned that she truly despised him.
This dealt a heavy blow to Jiang Mingyue, and he vowed to make her, like everyone else, fall at his feet in worship!
***
Synopsis:
Before transmigrating, Shen Yaoxing only wanted to find a reliable man to spend her life with. Who knew that after transmigrating, she would become a reliable woman herself…
A forced misandrist, highly skilled, and reliable female lead
vs.
An initially aloof and arrogant, later morbid, obsessed male lead
_____
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Chapter Comments (4)
Inline Comments (87)
She knew she ought to push away that dark hand. She mustn’t be seduced by his si
🙄 so angry. And she falls for him again?? 🙄 No will power. Such a weakling.
The following day, they headed into the village together. Kayena’s thoughtful re
Why after all the incidents i am suspicious of Kayena??
“The evidence you’ve gone out of your way to show me is far too abundant to chal
Why the fuck did he need to do that?! 😦 If I were Natasha…even living 100 livesi won’t forgive him 😡
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Limited return by death? I guess nice story mechanism
He broke her trust, and now want her to believe that he is in love. I thing he also have his memories of the past.
It’s a little lot too late ass why no do this earlier if you regressed before