I'm Terminal Anyway, No Regrets (17 Chapters Left to Complete) - Chapter 1
“It’s all because of you! Of all things, that ominous thing had to be born!”
My mother slapped my cheek.
“Get out! Just die! Do you intend to wipe out our entire house? If not for your title, I never would have married you!”
I was cast out by my husband.
I walked the roads, unaware that my feet were drenched in blood. The people, suffering from the war, clung desperately to me, a member of the royal family.
When they learned I was the manifestation of divine rejection—an utterly powerless one—they cried,
“She’s a witch! The kingdom is ruined because a witch like her was born into the royal family!”
“Kill her! If we kill the witch, the gods will protect Glisia once again!”
“Kill her! It’s all that witch’s fault!”
My hair was torn out, my clothes ripped by sharp nails, my skin clawed open. Stones flew at me from every direction.
I was hated by everyone.
Glishia—the land called the Nation of the Gods.
Four ducal houses, each embodying the supernatural powers of earth, wind, water, and light, brought prosperity to the people. In return, the royal bloodline existed to save those very dukes from the afflictions caused by their powers.
Their noble sacrifice protected the people of Glishia.
I, Ormia Beltoar, born as the king’s fourth child, was the only powerless member among the royals.
No—how much better it would have been if I were truly powerless!
The divine blessing meant to relieve the suffering of gifted dukes normally manifested when a royal turned five.
That crucial day, when blessings should have emerged, became the worst day of my life. The moment I bestowed my blessing, the recipient collapsed in agony.
My blessing brought only pain to the gifted.
Again and again—two, three, four times—even the Duke of Wind, famed for his exceptional power, screamed it was a “curse” as my power wracked him with torment.
Divine rejection. Glishia’s flaw. A defective product.
I became a symbol of ill omen.
Because the people knew of my existence, I had to attend official ceremonies. Though disguised as merely powerless, I remained officially the king’s child—but effectively, I became non-existent.
One day, a commoner girl manifested divine power.
She took my place.
My life was one of neglect and contempt. Though I accepted a proposal from a man who seemed kind, even that marriage was merely for appearances—a union arranged solely for his title—and brought me no happiness.
My misfortune only deepened.
The Empire invaded Glishia.
Amid the chaos, I was saved by Liam Wilboyer—the very man who had invaded Glishia.
The Duke of Fire, exiled from Glishia as a heretic.
I expected him to kill me, just as he had done to my parents and siblings. Instead, he merely imprisoned me.
Liam was crueler than anyone I had ever met. No emotion emanated from him at all.
His eyes were utterly hollow.
Though no one tormented me anymore, inexplicable agony persisted. My body slowly withered away.
One day, visiting me in that cold prison as I lay dying, Liam said,
“The gifted dukes are trying to rescue a princess who carries no blessing. They cling to the foolish hope that her child might be different.”
His voice carried no thrill or warmth of conquest—only icy detachment.
“But I’ll never hand you over to them. They must feel the same agonizing death by slow decay—just as my little brother did.”
Ironically, the prison became my sanctuary.
As I faded toward death, the only person who stayed by my side was Liam Wilboyer.
In my entire life—not my parents, not my siblings, not my servants, not even my husband—no one had ever remained by my side so faithfully for so long.
Because I was the divine rejection, people believed my mere presence brought misfortune and avoided me.
I was dying, and I could feel my life nearing its end.
I was lonely. I was cold.
Though I had grown accustomed to loneliness during my short life, facing death made me even more vulnerable.
It was human instinct. In my final moments, I reached my hand through the bars toward Liam.
Perhaps he pitied me.
Or perhaps he only intended to push my dirty hand back inside the cell.
But his hand touched mine.
Tears welled up from the warmth.
It was so warm—so comforting to feel another person’s warmth.
In that instant, without my realizing, my blessing flowed forth.
I couldn’t control it.
White blossoms, appearing whenever I used my power, scattered through the air and slowly drifted down upon me as I lay on the floor.
At first, Liam Wilboyer winced in pain—but gradually, color returned to his face, and his once-clouded eyes now clearly focused on me.
“You…”
Ah—so this is how my blessing is truly meant to be used.
I had been called divine rejection because my blessing brought only suffering to the gifted. But the truth was, I simply hadn’t known how to use it properly.
Only at the moment of death did I finally understand its right use.
And then it ended.
I opened my eyes—and I was fourteen again.
I had returned to the past. This was my second life.
From my previous life, I now understood how to properly wield my blessing.
It wasn’t divine rejection, a flaw, or ill omen—it was the greatest power in the entire royal lineage, greater than any before.
At a grand banquet, before everyone’s eyes, I demonstrated my blessing and proved my worth.
Amid falling white petals, I declared to all:
“I am not rejection.”
The gifted dukes collapsed before my blessing, trembling with overwhelming emotion.
They hailed it as a sacred, immense divine blessing unlike anything they had ever experienced. The entire crowd cheered, and the temple declared me a saint.
But while I was at the temple, the four ducal houses joined forces and launched a rebellion.
Overnight, the king of Glishia changed.
The Beltoar royals became slaves to the dukes, and I was locked in a gilded cage.
“Come now, Ormia! Use your power! Bestow your blessing upon us!”
Duke Haiman imprisoned me and monopolized my blessing. Surrounded by frenzied people, I became a spectacle.
I became their puppet, stripped of all freedom.
Then one day, something strange appeared on my body.
“Death blossoms have emerged on your body. At this rate, you won’t live past twenty-two.”
The physician gave me a terminal diagnosis.
Rarely among Glishian royals, some bore flower-shaped marks—and all of them had died before reaching twenty-two.
Searching my memories, I recalled that in my first life, I had also died around my twenty-second birthday.
Upon hearing my prognosis, Duke Haiman grew impatient.
He became obsessed with my child—determined to produce an heir who would inherit my power so he could monopolize it forever. He repeatedly threatened me to keep producing those blessed blossoms.
He even brought my parents and siblings before me, holding knives to their throats to coerce me.
It was a living hell—but then hope arrived.
The Empire invaded Glishia, with Wilboyer leading their forces.
At last, my nightmare drew to a close.
Watching Liam enter my secret chamber—the private room the duke had kept me in—I knew my second life had ended.
But it wasn’t over.
I opened my eyes—and I was eighteen again.
This was my third life.
“Father! Father!”
It had been so long since I’d called out that word.
Crying, I ran to the king and told him everything I’d endured.
My first life, my second life—all of it.
“It’s not a lie. It’s not a dream. Look—you’ll see I’m not divine rejection!”
Begging him to believe me, I demonstrated my power.
I proved my blessing and exposed the dukes’ atrocities. The king, moved by his young daughter’s desperate tears, believed me.
As a result, I was locked away in a tower.
The king feared the dukes might rebel just as I’d foretold—but lacking the strength to oppose them, he simply imprisoned me instead.
“Father! Mother! Help!”
My parents abandoned me, and my older brothers never came.
The king installed the same blessing-bearer from my first life as my replacement.
Liam invaded Glishia right on schedule.
Though the king, forewarned by my knowledge, prepared for the invasion, he couldn’t withstand the Empire’s might.
My body withered away in that cold tower. Liam, knowing this, never transferred me to the dungeon.
“If only your Beltoars had helped even a little, my brother wouldn’t have died like that. My father wouldn’t have gone mad—and I wouldn’t have had to be the one to slit his throat.”
Once again, I heard his bitter, tear-filled resentment.
Liam visited me occasionally, his expression blank, silently watching me fade away.
There was neither mockery nor pity in his gaze.
If he’d only kept me alive as bait to trap the dukes, he wouldn’t have needed to visit at all.
He could have simply left me to die—but instead, Liam came. Sometimes he muttered to himself; other times, he tossed in bread as if offering charity.
“…Why?”
I wondered why he kept coming to see me.
In my first life, I never got the chance to ask.
In my second, I ran out of time.
But this time, I wanted to know.
Why did he stay by my side as I died?
“My brother died alone. Facing death alone is a lonely thing.”
The Wilboyers—the heretical House of Fire, exiled by King Beltoar.
Liam’s younger sibling, who had succumbed to the side effects of his gift, and countless other suffering Wilboyers.
I could have saved them.
If there was another life after this…
“If there’s a next life… I’ll definitely save you—and your brother.”
Liam only stared at me silently, his eyes hollow and empty.
In his pupils, my dying form was reflected.
I wanted to show him my power. I reached out my hand—but couldn’t tell if he took it.
Perhaps someone as gentle as he would have.
And so, I died for the third time.
Then my fourth life began.
I opened my eyes—and I was in a bedroom.
White flower petals were slowly drifting down around me.
It was the townhouse of Jeffrey Olan, the viscount I had married—and this was the viscountess’s bedroom.
In my first life, I had married Viscount Jeffrey Olan, but we never consummated our marriage and merely pretended to be husband and wife. Still, I kept waiting for him.
I was powerless, starved for affection, and a caged pet who didn’t even know how to escape.
I was a pitiful child, shackling my own ankles, striving desperately for even a scrap of love.
My first life ended with stones hurled by the people.
My second, betrayed by the ducal houses.
My third, abandoned by my family.
Yet here I was—alive once more in a fourth life.
The sunlight streaming through the window,
the air filling my lungs,
the fabric brushing against my skin,
even the mild morning hunger—
all filled me with overwhelming happiness.
I was joyful.
Though I knew I would still die at twenty-two, I was grateful.
Covering my eyes, I burst into tears.
My sobs likely echoed down the hallway—but no one came in. Though I was merely decoration even in the viscount’s mansion, I was thankful today that no one disturbed me.
Tears streamed down my cheeks, soaking the pillowcase—but I couldn’t stop crying.
Instinctively, I knew this was my final life.
If this truly was my last chance,
and I was fated to die young anyway,
‘Liam Wilboyer.’
Perhaps this time, I can change your life.
When male lead is the homewrecker
“I know she doesn’t love him.”
I’ve read the novel below twice already. Girls, I’m highly recommending it to you!
The female lead? Not a good person.
The second male lead? Not a good person.
The male lead? Willingly plays the third party, breaking up the female and second male lead’s relationship despite all the warnings from his friends—so yeah, he’s definitely not a good person either.
Basically, nobody in this novel is simple-minded or without scheming.
The female lead starts off as the male lead’s secretary, but don’t worry—later on, she takes over the company while the male lead steps back to support her. He won’t steal her spotlight, overshadow her, or dull her shine.
I love novels where men are out here snatching wigs, tearing each other down, and going to war just to win the female lead’s affection. And this is exactly that kind of novel. Most of Hai Dai Ran’s works have this dynamic. You’ll see the male characters’ emotions being pushed to the absolute extreme.
There’s even a scene where the second male lead exposes the male lead online for being a homewrecker. The brotherhood immediately gangs up on him, dragging him through the mud. I find it compelling —it completely flips reality on its head, where usually, women are the ones fighting over a man and getting torn apart by the sisterhood.
For me, female leads in the novels I read should only struggle in their careers, not in love. But if the brainless romantics in the story are all men? I have zero complaints.
I’ve pretty much read all of Hai Dai Ran’s novels and even translated all of them—her works are just my thing. I’ll slowly upload everything here. One day, when my website is official, I hope I can invite her to join as one of the star authors.
Here’s the story synopsis:
One-line summary: She is his lifelong obsession, to the point where he was willing to be a third wheel, scorned by society, just to wedge his way into her relationship with her fiancé.
Cold-hearted and indifferent female lead + Scheming and subservient CEO male lead
Intro 1:
“I know she doesn’t love him.”
With blood trickling from his clenched fist, Rong Xiu gazed at the woman before him, his eyes clouded with anguish. Hidden in the wardrobe, he had witnessed Fan Xia – the woman he desperately loved – in an intimate embrace with her fiancé. Yet his heart still yearned for her, defying all reason.
Fan Xia, the elegant and composed assistant, carried something mysterious in her eyes whenever she looked at her fiancé, Wen Lan Sheng. Strange occurrences began to surface – secret meetings with the young Gu Jin Yi, an unexplained withdrawal of 5,000 yuan… Then suddenly, her fiancé’s sister, Wen Jing, violently attacked her.
In this matriarchal society, Rong Xiu had risen to become the chairman of a powerful healthcare conglomerate, breaking through gender prejudices. But for the first time, he willingly stepped into the shadows as the other man, disregarding his friends’ warnings to become her secret lover.
Because he had discovered the truth – Fan Xia wasn’t the pure angel everyone believed her to be. And perhaps, he was the only one capable of helping her execute her mysterious plan…
Intro 2:
Rong Xiu’s biggest regret in life was missing out on Fan Xia.
He secretly loved Fan Xia for 7 years.
Watched her go public with her boyfriend.
Watched her kiss her boyfriend at their wedding.
Until that man blissfully nestled in Fan Xia’s arms, obtaining everything he could only dream of.
The crazy jealousy stripped away his hidden secret love, layer by layer, burning like wildfire.
Fan Xia, how can I have you!
【Reading and Trigger Warning Guide】
1. Female dominant, male submissive, male pregnancy
2. Male lead schemes his way to the top, male competition
_____
Please help me, I want to bring you the best possible things.
If you find any chapter or novel with poor translation and editing quality, let me know by commenting directly under that novel or chapter. I will retranslate it as soon as possible.
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Chapter Comments (17)
Inline Comments (120)
For a man, this reaction was understandably awkward.
Oh. 👁️👁️😳
“If she’s being sent away anyway, who would do such a thing!”
Seriously, that people disgust me so badly… The audacity! Caring for her only in the struggle, and calling her devious when they are the ones who should be cursed! I hope she rises in the Empire and i hope that the news somehow causes in them atleast despair or some kind of disability.
“Marcus, please shut up! People avoided me, calling me ‘God’s rejection’—how cou
👁️👁️
👄
Man… I know she’s miserable, but did you have to humiliate the woman like that?
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Girrlll whaaaat😭 that’s saaaaaaaad. But i hope she doesn’t do something to let them harm her body… even if it’s for scaping
Yes! Thank god he say it! Omg, she is crazy but the olan worked well. I hope she gets to the empire safely and swiftly
Loved this novel, i came because i started the manhwa and the story was really wonderfull, so i just had to know the rest. I am loving it.