If You Wish For My Death (6 Chapters Left to Complete) - Chapter 5
Veronica, who had been laughing lightly as if she didn’t care at all about the maid’s feelings, suddenly stiffened her expression.
Startled by the sudden gaze, the maid flinched.
“I’d like to have some tea.”
“I-I’ll prepare it right away.”
The maid quickly bowed and hurried out of the room.
Veronica sat down on the long sofa by the windowsill instead of the bed. She remained still for a moment, then relaxed her body fully.
Unlike her usual days filled with restlessness and anxiety, today felt different—leisurely and peaceful.
If one changed their mindset, even the beginning of a tiresome past didn’t seem so bad.
Yes, for the first time in a very long while, she was in an exceptionally good mood.
With a distorted smile, Veronica lay down fully on the sofa.
Soon after, the maid returned carrying a teapot and teacups. Veronica leisurely sipped the tea poured for her.
“Veronica.”
Harry, having just seen off the two princes, came to find Veronica.
He looked at his daughter, who was calmly enjoying tea time with an unusually serene expression, perplexed.
Just this morning, she had been bedridden with a high fever, yet now she was half-reclining on the sofa, sipping tea at her ease—it was no wonder he was astonished.
Noticing her father who had come to see her, Veronica greeted him for the first time in a while: “Ah, Father. I hope you’ve been well.”
“Anyone seeing us might think we haven’t met in ages.”
“That’s exactly how it feels—like I haven’t seen you in so long, Father.”
In her previous life, right up until the very end, Veronica had never properly faced her father.
She’d been too consumed by her desperate wish to die.
“Nonsense.”
Fortunately, he dismissed his daughter’s greeting as mere idle talk.
Veronica sat up from her slouched position. Harry took a seat in the empty space beside her.
His eyes carefully scanned her face, and his wrinkled hand gently touched her forehead.
“How are you feeling?”
“My condition?”
“You were quite ill lately, weren’t you?”
Ah, now that he mentioned it, Veronica recalled the memory she’d nearly forgotten out of sheer boredom. According to the original timeline, she should have been suffering from fever until this morning.
She hadn’t noticed it when she first woke up, but now she felt a heavy sense of fatigue.
Still, compared to the countless agonies of death she’d endured, this was nothing more than a minor inconvenience.
“I’m fine. The fever has completely gone down.”
“That’s a relief.”
Harry let out a sigh of relief.
“But, Veronica…”
“Yes, Father?”
“When… did you develop feelings for His Highness Prince Teron?”
“So that’s why you came—to talk about this.”
Veronica gave a sly smile. Harry added anxiously,
“Just yesterday, weren’t your affections set on His Highness Prince Roel?”
It had even been an obsessive, one-sided infatuation.
Though he’d been surprised that his proud, high-spirited daughter would fall into such a crush, he’d never imagined it would be on the fourth prince—the one with such weak standing and even a physical disability in the Imperial Family.
He’d wanted to immediately persuade her to stop, but her infatuation had been quite serious—
She’d actively pursued him for a whole year, even collapsing from feverish exhaustion.
Just the day before yesterday, she’d sobbed, begging to marry His Highness Prince Asar.
Having lost his wife early and with only this one daughter left, Harry had feared she might die next and had rushed to seek an audience with His Imperial Majesty the Emperor.
He’d pleaded earnestly until the Emperor agreed to arrange an engagement between his daughter and the fourth prince.
Yet now, his daughter was requesting to marry not him, but another prince.
“Weren’t you desperately wishing to marry His Highness Prince Roel? You wouldn’t even eat, only crying—may I ask why you suddenly changed your mind?”
“Well… perhaps falling ill with fever helped clear my head. Can a person’s heart really stay the same forever? I suppose I didn’t love him enough to cling desperately to an unrequited affection.”
“What nonsense. Just yesterday—”
“Father.”
Veronica cut him off.
“Are you unhappy that I’ve given up on His Highness Prince Roel?”
“It’s not that, it’s just…”
“Then that’s all I need to hear. What more is there to say?”
Veronica grinned cheerfully and finished the rest of her tea. Harry stared at her strangely.
Perhaps it was because he was finally having a proper conversation with his daughter after so long—
Her face was unmistakably his own daughter’s, yet inside seemed to dwell an old man who’d weathered countless storms over long years and achieved enlightenment.
“You seem… a little different.”
“I’m exactly the same, Father.”
Whether she understood his thoughts or not, Veronica simply kept smiling.
“Are you truly alright? You’re not forcing yourself to give up, are you?”
“Of course not, Father. I’m actually in a very good mood right now.”
“…If you say so, I suppose I have no right to argue.”
Though Harry was deeply unsettled, he couldn’t object since Veronica genuinely appeared happy.
Veronica set down her teacup. A brief silence passed—an oddly suffocating silence.
After seeming to ponder something deeply for a moment, Veronica resumed speaking.
“Actually, Father, there’s something I’d like to ask of you.”
“Tell me anything.”
Ah, so she hadn’t fully let go after all? Was there another motive? Harry assumed she’d ask for something related to the fourth prince.
Knowing how determined she’d been before—when the prince hadn’t returned her affections, she’d tried other means—this time she must have made a firm resolution.
But what came from Veronica’s lips was an unexpected request.
“Next time you go to the palace, please allow me to accompany you.”
“You want to accompany me on my audience?”
“Yes. You usually visit His Imperial Majesty around this time of year. I’d like to join you on that occasion.”
Harry’s eyes widened.
“May I ask why?”
“Just because I want to.”
It was a completely incomprehensible answer.
Harry looked baffled, but Veronica simply kept smiling pleasantly.
Two weeks later, father and daughter Hardness entered the Imperial Capital.
Once Veronica had recovered sufficiently, Harry had brought her along to the audience with His Imperial Majesty, just as she’d wished.
In the grand audience hall, Veronica met the Emperor.
The very man whom, in the distant future, she would command to behead his own father while shouting “traitor!” now welcomed them both with relaxed warmth.
Veronica skillfully concealed the turmoil within as she faced the Emperor.
“May the glory of the sun always be with you. It’s my first time meeting you, Your Imperial Majesty. I am Veronica Hardness.”
“Oh, I see. So you’re the young lady of Duke Hardness’s house I’ve heard so much about.”
“I’m truly honored that you already know of me.”
Though she knew the rumors about her couldn’t possibly be flattering, Veronica smiled as if genuinely delighted.
The Emperor chuckled heartily at her demeanor.
“Haha! Truly a daughter of a duke—you’re remarkably mature for a girl of sixteen.”
“You flatter me.”
She took no pleasure in the Emperor’s praise whatsoever.
After all, how could she hold in reverence a man so lacking in patience and so utterly debauched that he’d sired numerous illegitimate children?
It was this very man whose sons’ struggles for the throne and rampant corruption had plunged the nation into chaos, yet who himself had died without suffering greatly.
A man like filth scraped from the bottom of a slop bucket. Veronica inwardly cursed him, yet never let the smile leave her face.
“Right, you said you had something to tell me?”
“Yes, Your Imperial Majesty.”
Wanting to avoid prolonging the meeting, she was about to get straight to the point when a servant announced another visitor’s arrival.
The Emperor waved cheerfully.
“Right on time.”
With the Emperor’s permission, two men entered the audience hall. Their faces were familiar.
“I summoned them upon hearing the young lady of House Hardness had come.”
The ones he’d summoned were Asar and Cassian.
It was clear why the Emperor had called them. The two princes, who’d come unexpectedly upon his sudden summons, didn’t look particularly pleased either.
Harry felt the same. Though he kept his expression carefully composed, his displeasure was unavoidable.
Of course, Veronica wasn’t particularly fond of the Emperor’s unnecessary consideration either, but right now, his unilateral decision wasn’t entirely unwelcome.
The Emperor clicked his tongue as he looked at his sons.
“I only called the fourth, yet the fifth came along too.”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
“Fifth Prince, you may return now.”
As Cassian hesitated to respond, Veronica spoke first.
“No, Your Majesty. His Highness Prince Teron should hear this as well.”
“The fifth child? …Very well, then take your place.”
Though displeased, the Emperor reluctantly granted him permission.
Cassian gave a brief bow and moved forward alongside Asar, and thus the two stood side by side next to His Imperial Majesty.
“Now, speak. What is it you wish to tell me?”
“In truth, I came seeking an audience because there’s something I deeply wish to request of Your Majesty.”
“Oh, is that so? Speak freely.”
The Emperor leaned forward slightly—
He clearly already knew what she’d say, his anticipation practically brimming.
Veronica smiled radiantly. Sunlight pouring through the glass windows seemed to shine solely upon her.
“I wish to marry His Highness Prince Cassian Teron Diasta.”
“W-What? The fifth prince? Not the fourth?”
The Emperor asked in confusion.
He was certain the young lady of House Hardness had set her heart on his fourth son—
After all, Duke Hardness himself had personally come requesting a marriage between her and the fourth prince.
From the Emperor’s perspective, binding House Hardness to his side wasn’t a bad move, so he’d even ordered the fourth prince to go personally to House Hardness to propose.
He’d been sure everything was proceeding smoothly—so what was this?
Veronica nodded.
“Yes, Your Majesty. The one I wish to marry is His Highness Prince Cassian Teron.”
When scheming men desperately battle for her favor in the male harem
This one’s also on my reread list! The rivalry, scheming between the men in the imperial harem are just as intense and thrilling as in classic palace drama novels, where concubines fight to the death. Give it a read, girls! I promise you won’t be disappointed.
Synopsis:
“I am not worthy of her… but I still want to be by her side, even if only as a loyal dog…”
Those were the painful whispers of Yue Guanyi – the proud Crown Prince of the Great Qi, who was torn between deep love and a guilty conscience. Despite holding the supreme power of the Imperial Guard, he still could not forget the dark past when he was sold into a brothel.
Fate played a cruel twist when Qiu Shuzhi – a young female official who had just passed the imperial examinations with top honors – stepped into his life. She did not know that she was the one who had saved him from a tragic fate many years ago. And now, her heart was the target of pursuit for both Yue Guanyi and the powerful Empress Dowager Qin Qing.
While Yue Guanyi only dared to silently care for and protect the one he loved from afar, the Empress Dowager Qin Qing openly expressed his feelings and did not hesitate to take advantage of his power to approach Qiu Shuzhi. The covert struggle between the two most powerful forces in the imperial court began…
Trigger warning: All men in this novel are yandere style.
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this chapter was extremely sad. I like the fact that the author keep emphasizing on her past life, like not to let go her trauma. I i have read many fast pace regression novels when as soon as fmc finds love everything else just goes really fast and nothing else matters almost as if forgetting the revenge which was suppose to be the priority, so far loving this novel i hope they don’t ruin it.
I can totally understand the fmc she don’t want fake friends cause she already has a experience where she thought someone was her friend but they where only using her for her status. I mean its always hard to trust people when u been betrayed badly. I can totally understand her having trust issues.
she must be thinking something really romantic is going on between them. If only she knew what her favorite is scheming in that head of hers.