There Is No Paradise Where I Ran Away To (14 Chapters Left to Complete) - Chapter 4
The sky’s warm, blue sunlight welcomed its new master, gently caressing the earth. As I opened the window to usher the advancing spring breeze into the room, I spotted carriages in the distance, lined up one after another, bearing the Beitnes family crest.
“If I put it nicely, you may stay here until you’ve fully repaid that debt. Conversely, it means you cannot leave until it’s all paid off.”
Several days ago, we finally found the source of the worrying 700,000 mori. What had begun as a simple request to stay only until Mother returned had turned into a pitiful, tearful plea.
Yet, I don’t regret it. If it’s for protecting Mother, that petty humiliation hardly even qualifies as humiliation.
“At least it’s fortunate the debt won’t grow any larger.”
Though I sighed in relief, everything remained shrouded in mystery.
How did Mother even know Duke Beitnes to borrow money from him? Why would Duke Beitnes lend such a large sum to someone with no credit? And what is his true motive behind showing me such leniency?
Somewhere between hostility and goodwill—or perhaps a shade closer to hostility—was that gaze.
A blue gaze… leaning toward hostility or toward goodwill?
Suddenly, a familiar memory surged, tangled and chaotic. Vivian frowned, trying to sort through those half-formed recollections, but they faded like mist, as if they had never existed at all.
The procession of carriages came to a halt in front of the mansion. At the sound of horses snorting, my drifting consciousness sharpened. I grabbed the pre-packed trunk and stepped out of the room.
Looking down from the second floor, the mansion was bustling with life for the first time in a while. Servants carrying belongings ignored Vivian entirely—without even a nod of greeting—but she didn’t mind in the slightest.
All she felt was a thrilling familiarity. It almost felt as if calling out “Mother! Father!” would bring an immediate reply.
“Place this luggage in the Duke’s bedroom. Be careful—it mustn’t break. Arrange it just as it was in his previous room; he’s terribly particular. And this…”
Charlotte, giving instructions to the butler, noticed Vivian standing on the lobby staircase. Vivian hurried downstairs and met Charlotte face-to-face for the first time. The feather-adorned hat suited Charlotte remarkably well, and Vivian’s eyes lingered on it briefly.
“I am Vivian Ebelline.”
Vivian quickly composed herself and offered proper respect and courtesy to Lady Beitnes. But no corresponding response came. Embarrassed by such blatant scrutiny, Vivian realized she was clearly unwelcome. Anxiously, she added:
“As you’ve likely heard, the Duke has permitted me to stay here temporarily. I’ll do my utmost not to trouble either of you. If you would specify a room for me, I’ll stay there.”
“Miss Ebelline may use her original room.”
With a sigh, Charlotte withdrew her irritable gaze and flicked a finger. An awkward-looking maid immediately scurried over.
“My original room? But that room is…”
“From now on, this girl will assist Miss Ebelline closely. If anything is amiss, please inform her.”
“What?”
Mother borrowed money from them, they waived the interest, allowed me to keep using my old room, and even assigned a maid.
Was that gaze not hostility—but goodwill?
I never interpreted it that way, yet the Duke and his wife seemed to show me something closer to kindness. But judging by Lady Beitnes’s expression, it appeared she had no say in any of these decisions.
Then why is the Duke showing me such excessive kindness?
As always, unanswered questions breed formless dread.
“No, my lady. A small room is all I need. My former room is meant for the masters, and besides, I don’t require a maid. I appreciate the gesture, though.”
“I’ll relay your words to the Duke, but he won’t change his mind. That’s simply not his way.”
Her tone, confident and certain, made it clear she and her husband knew everything about Edwin Beitnes.
“I’m Charlotte Windler. I look forward to getting along well.”
Charlotte… Windler?
The surname “Windler” stunned Vivian, who had assumed Charlotte was Lady Beitnes. Confused and embarrassed, Charlotte bowed politely to Vivian and immediately turned away.
[This is the timeline separator]Why? For what reason?
Charlotte’s heels tapped the floor impatiently. She knew it looked ugly, but if she didn’t vent somehow, her frustration would surely spill in an even worse direction.
“The Duke called me unexpectedly this early evening and simply said, ‘I’ll be away from the mansion for company business for a while. You’re in charge of wrapping things up here.’”
She had just been thinking it was the perfect opportunity to ask for a delay in their wedding.
“And from now on, Vivian Ebelline will also be staying at that mansion.”
Had Edwin not followed up with that shocking statement, she might have already been begging him to postpone the wedding.
“Let Ebelline continue using her old room. And assign her a capable maid, too.”
What mattered most to Charlotte right now was delaying the wedding—but Edwin’s unexpected attention toward someone else unsettled her deeply.
Edwin was paying attention to Ebelline. Whether for good or ill, this was startling: Edwin, who had never shown interest in anything beyond company affairs, now had a surprising new focus.
Charlotte abruptly halted and turned around. Behind the busy servants, Ebelline appeared, clutching a trunk.
Their eyes met again. That girl—having lost everything—was smiling foolishly. Charlotte forced a stiff, polite smile, turned back, and felt an irrepressible heat rising in her chest.
[This is the timeline separator]The road from Perrington to Rodinia was filled with dark clouds. Just as I thought, “It’s about to pour,” heavy raindrops began pounding the carriage, shaking its interior.
A carriage. And rain.
Naturally, an unforgettable memory surfaced—clear and vivid.
“You’re not a bad person. I’m being chased right now. Please, help me survive. I must reach the harbor—I need to board the ship to Newway.”
A fourteen-year-old boy begged a nine-year-old girl for his life. Hiding inside her carriage, that was the extent of his desperate plea.
The boy, fleeing Preston’s soldiers, was covered in mud and looked like a beggar; the girl, refined like a noble princess. That stark contrast must have stirred the little girl’s compassion.
“What’s your name?”
“Sayer…”
“Sayer?”
“Sayer Raven.”
Preston’s royal dynasty had changed once more. Earl Ebelline, seeking to restore the Mayer dynasty, overthrew Duke Raven, who had defended King Banister, and sent them all to the executioner.
Now, anyone in Preston bearing the Raven name was being hunted down and killed by the Ebellines. Despite knowing this dire reality, that boy had still dared to tell his name to the little girl—a bold act indeed.
“My name is… Vivian Ebelline.”
He saw remorse in the small girl’s eyes—and only then realized the carriage he’d climbed into to save his life belonged to his enemy.
He couldn’t bear the shame of begging his enemy for mercy. The vow he’d made—to live like a dog and exact revenge on the Ebellines—was utterly shattered by that one name: Vivian Ebelline.
Edwin recalled the moment he signed his name beneath “Vivian Ebelline,” carefully written on the loan agreement she’d provided.
A woman brought to her knees by a single signature of mine. Unaware that such a document might destroy her, she’d boldly inscribed “Ebelline” there.
It felt almost like someone else’s story—that I owed my very survival to such a woman.
Fourteen years ago, little Vivian Ebelline must have seen Sayer Raven in much the same way:
A powerless, pitiful traitor and survivor—doomed to die soon no matter what. So the kind-hearted Ebelline had decided to show mercy.
Unlike me.
The boy saved by that child now planned to take the life of the gentle, pitiful Ebelline—
At the right moment.
At the most perfect instant.
[This is the timeline separator]The carriage arrived at the Rodinia ducal residence. Under the butler’s umbrella, Edwin slowly surveyed the gathered servants at the mansion’s entrance. Through the crowd, Charlotte appeared, piercing through the rain with a radiant smile bright enough to dispel even storm clouds, rushing toward him anxiously.
“Your Grace!”
To Charlotte, it was always just Edwin—even in the rain. She’d walk through fire for him if needed.
“You must be exhausted from the long journey. Shall I prepare a meal first? Oh—and it’s been so long, Mr. Loic!”
She didn’t forget to warmly greet Loic, who had quietly appeared behind Edwin.
“You’ll catch a cold. You’re getting soaked.”
Edwin was unusually calm. He took the umbrella from the butler and handed it to Charlotte, whose freckled cheeks flushed red.
“Thank you, Your Grace. Or perhaps you’d prefer a bath first, since it’s still early?”
Edwin didn’t respond to her gentle question. His eyes were fixed far away, scanning the crowd of servants for something—or someone—else.
The golden-haired girl he expected to see was nowhere.
He looked up toward the second floor, searching for anyone gazing down from a window—but not a single strand of sunlit hair appeared anywhere.
“…Miss Ebelline has been playing the piano all day for the past few days. Sophie just told me she went for a short walk.”
As soon as he mentioned “Ebelline,” his attention shifted toward Charlotte. She was deeply annoyed but hid it well.
“Oh, right—Miss Ebelline also said the room was too generous and she didn’t need a maid. I passed on her message, though I told her not to get her hopes up. What should we do?”
Edwin let out a dry chuckle. The insolent Ebelline, who hadn’t even shown her face, had used her guardian to convey her wishes.
“Leave it.”
He was about to leave when his eyes casually caught sight of a golden-haired woman far off.
Her ash-gray eyes were also fixed on him. Even though their gazes met, Vivian gave no reaction. Edwin turned to walk toward her—and instantly, Vivian panicked and fled without reason, vanishing from sight.
[This is the timeline separator]The mansion’s commotion stirred my heart. It almost felt that if I turned my head, I’d find the people I love—and who love me—right back in their rightful places.
Ironically, though this was a mansion stolen from us—where our family crest and traces of our parents had vanished—it now felt more alive with our family’s presence than ever before.
Yet, the obstacles ahead grew clearer: my missing father, my mother who left behind massive debts and never returned, and the cake Duke Beitnes offered—sweet cream on the surface, or perhaps a terrifying poison within?
An unfounded sense of dread drove Vivian into the forest. She longed to escape this harsh reality, even briefly, and calm the storm within.
“Not to your liking, Miss Ebelline?”
Startled by the low voice, Vivian tightened her grip on the fork she’d loosely held. Looking up, she saw the Duke and Miss Windler.
During all the days the Duke had been absent, Charlotte had always invited her to meals and dined together with her—despite clearly not wanting to. She never made exceptions.
“I’m sorry for the misunderstanding earlier. I thought you two were married.”
As always, Vivian initiated conversation to break the awkward silence.
“The Duke is my guardian. We’ve been like family ever since he was adopted into the Beitnes household.”
Only then did she learn they were guardian and ward—and that Edwin had been adopted into the Beitnes family.
“No, it’s delicious.”
“Then eat. Staring at it won’t make the food jump into your mouth.”
“Yes…”
The brief exchange ended there. Charlotte chattered cheerfully like a songbird, recounting everything that had happened in his absence. Edwin responded with just enough remarks to keep her conversation flowing.
As Charlotte said, they truly were family. Watching them, Vivian keenly felt the distance between herself and them—and realized, with painful clarity, that she had no one left.
Earlier, when she’d fled into the woods, she’d heard Duke Beitnes’s carriage approaching. She hadn’t been waiting for him—but Vivian ran anyway, clinging to the foolish delusion that her father, not the Duke, might be inside.
Though she knew it wasn’t her father, she denied it. Though she knew her mother wouldn’t wait for her, she refused to believe it. She clung to the absurd hope that if she ran breathlessly, even the gods would be moved and restore her life.
In her frantic sprint, the hem of her only dress became caked in mud, and one shoe came loose. She shoved her wet foot back in and ran again.
Escaping reality leaves a scar that never fades.
The servants surrounding them, the horses impatiently snorting as they rushed to finish work, and Edwin and Charlotte’s cheerful rapport—all formed a harmonious picture that Vivian Ebelline no longer belonged in.
“Miss Ebelline.”
Just as tears threatened to well up at thoughts of her parents, the Duke’s deep voice resonated.
“Don’t you know how to use a knife?”
Vivian silently shook her head.
“Or is the Ebelline household so lowly that I must even teach you how to eat properly?”
Only then did she sharply lift her head, her eyes red-rimmed, glaring back defiantly.
“Why do you speak to me like that? Though my family owes you a great debt, such insults are deeply offensive.”
Her tone was firm—but his smile was arrogant, betraying no hint of regret. Edwin rang a bell, and a servant immediately approached.
“Miss Ebelline says her meal is insufficient. Bring more food.”
Vivian glanced at her plate and quickly refused.
“I’m fine. I still have food.”
“I’m not fine with that.”
His posture remained perfectly upright, but the ambiguous smile—neither hostile nor kind—made her shiver.
“If you dislike being insulted, then eat, Miss Ebelline.”
“But I…”
Edwin rose from his seat. With each heavy step closer, her head dipped lower. The moment she sensed his shoes beside her, his rough hand seized the chair’s backrest and spun her around.
Her body, once facing the table, now faced Edwin. Before she could even lift her head in surprise, his cold fingertips gripped her chin, forcing eye contact.
“It seems you don’t understand the meaning of the document you signed that day.”
This was the second time she’d been shocked by his ungentlemanly behavior—grabbing a lady’s face so brazenly. His overwhelming presence pinned her in place; she couldn’t push him away or speak her mind.
“What attitude should you have toward the goodwill I’ve shown you?”
His voice softened, as if hostility had never existed.
“You have the duty to abide by all my decisions and the responsibility to obey my will. Accepting my goodwill means exactly that, Miss Ebelline.”
At a moment when she missed her parents most acutely, it was those blue eyes before her that cut her heart to the core.
“Eat even if you don’t want to. Wherever my eyes can’t reach, if food is served, you will eat it—without leaving anything behind.”
Tears she’d tried to hold back streamed down her reddened cheeks, but those merciless eyes stubbornly waited for her reply.
When the male lead is punished by carrying the female lead’s child and having periods like a woman
“I’ve given birth to two children for you, yet you still think about him.
Was I nothing but his substitute to you from beginning to end?”
Synopsis:
Meng Huan, a scumbag who has dated countless girlfriends, transmigrates to a female-dominated country.
Day 1: Whether it’s female dominance or not doesn’t matter. The beauties here are passionate and amorous. Isn’t it easier to date them than in modern times?
Day 2: After a night, Meng Huan discovers the differences in the female-dominated world. Men here actually have chastity locks and menstrual cycles. This hinders his ability to perform, damn it!
Day 3: What’s wrong with sleeping around? I don’t want you to marry me. I’m meant to be a playboy. I don’t care about male virtues… What? You want to drown me in a pig cage? Marry, I’ll marry!
Day N: Meng Huan inexplicably vomits and receives the shocking news of his life… He’s pregnant.
_____
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MANGA DISCUSSION
1 Comment
Chapter Comments (2)
Oh god, what the heck with him?!!! If he wanted to hate, it wasn’t her!!! Feel bad for fl
“He would die at the hands of the man he’d once spared, without ever finding his missing father or seeing his mother again, who’d promised to return.
+He surrendered his body to fading consciousness.”
It’s “She” in this part, not he.
Inline Comments (1)
Revenge against Ebelline, who had sent his family to the executioner’s block. An
But she wasn’t involved in the death of his parents.
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Blairwoods
I can understand if he hated her but she was innocent man. The one responsibility for the sins were her parents