Lady Devil - Chapter 118

#118

He pressed my shoulder with his left elbow that wasn’t holding me, and in an instant, he swallowed my head with his palm and pressed it down forcefully.

As I swallowed dry saliva in surprise, Johannes’s heartbeat, pounding as if about to collapse, came over to my temple. The sensation of the blade that had been shallowly embedded in my palm suddenly falling away was chilling. After confirming the sound of metal hitting the floor, Johannes finally exhaled a labored breath.

“Tolerance. Misunderstanding…. Inet….”

“……”

“Yes, misunderstanding, you….”

“……”

“I, that, can’t… don’t you think.”

He whispered desperately to me as if wringing out his insides. I felt a tightness in my chest. It’s a misunderstanding. That trembling voice seemed to brush over my nape and shoulders. It’s okay.

I grabbed Johannes’s lapel and buried my forehead in it. What’s okay…. Nothing has changed. Resentful tears and darkness mixed chaotically, making my vision waver.

“I… hate you so much….”

I sobbed under his palm.

“I hate you and I hate myself… Ah, I, really… I feel like I’m going to die…. What should I do, Johannes. I can’t stand it anymore…. I really hate it…. I don’t have the confidence to love you gently, nor to see your back…. I truly feel like I’ve gone mad….”

“……”

“Are you showing me this side of you out of responsibility alone, when you’re not even sure if you won’t change? Don’t do that, Johannes. If I’m to remain by your side like this, I will… treat you as if you don’t exist…. Ah, yes, I won’t see you anymore. I won’t listen to your voice. Like in the old days, never, never again will I open my mouth to you….”

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