Lady Devil - Chapter 117

#117

“You’re the one who twisted me like this. You’re also the one… who showed me that twisted form like a mirror…. So beg me for forgiveness. Fear that I might leave you forever and tremble, endlessly prove that you belong to me. Want me as if you can’t live without me. Love me…! Like that, like that…!”

“…..”

“Kill….”

…Kill me.

At that moment, I seemed to open my eyes wide. My lips, which had ended a long string of curses with self-harm, parted as if breaking off. The last word I spat out carelessly seemed to strike the back of my head.

Kill me. It was the deepest inner thought that even I didn’t know. The turbid river inside me formed a rapid current, unintentionally revealing the muck beneath.

Kill me.

I felt as if I was taking my first breath. The feeling was as if I had wandered in fog for decades or centuries, and with one inadvertent step, crossed that boundary. The white-stained, rather dark view before my eyes suddenly cleared.

How consumed by evil was this twelve-year-old girl in my head? Why did she stomp on even clear affection with near-mad kicks, stand tall on it, and scream for his death? Why on earth did she push me into such confusion? Good heavens. That child….

She was trying to save ‘me’.

Kretzman.

At that moment, I remembered. The nights. The cruel nights when I had to endure lovemaking with Johannes as if being assaulted. The secret and terrible ecstasy I felt each night, tied limb to limb by Johannes’ hands.

In other words, I would tremble, reaching the most intense climax when I could feel Johannes obsessing over me with my whole body, when I was crumbling in his grasp.

Seeing Johannes suffering because of me made me feel as if I had regained the power I had lost, making me leap with joy. When I sobbed in Johannes’ violent embrace, obsessing over me to the point of pain, I felt his affection more clearly than ever. Ah, so cruel and….

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