But soon, she gathered herself, thinking that it couldn’t be possible.
She had played Mi Yeon, but didn’t want to die like Mi Yeon.
Regardless, Kang rapidly rose to stardom, receiving almost as much attention as the lead.
It was like a massive hit by a chartreversing song, all the paths she had walked were highlighted again.
Director Hwang started excessively fussing over Kang since then.
Given he had the golden goose, it wasn’t too much for the greedy man to treat her like gold or jade.
The only one who sincerely worried about Kang’s health due to the successive forced marches was her manager, Sam Young.
Ever since the day, a long time ago, when she started having nightmares, she never slept soundly, which he knew all too well.
((())) ((())) ((()))
After returning home, Kang showered and headed to the espresso machine in the living room, as was her habit.
Her hand, about to press the button, stopped dead in its tracks.
Should I help you?
She remembered San’s words, always spoken in her dreams.
So she stood dumbfounded in the dim kitchen, not even the light properly on, for quite a while.
Her head felt heavy and blurry. Eyelids dropping slowly.
Living with hundreds of weights tied to her nerve cells, time always seemed to pass twice as slowly.
The finger that had barely touched the button was withdrawn after hesitation.
“…….”
Normally, she would have avoided sleep at all costs, but today was different.
While it was too early to say she trusted him, she thought she wanted to give it a try.
Whether he would appear in her dream today and save her.
And if she met San in the dream, she wanted to ask him something she hadn’t asked earlier.
Could he help her get out of this hellish nightmare?
Or was there a way she wouldn’t dream at all?
She wondered if he might know something.
Someone might say she’s crazy, but it was because she had actually encountered him, who she had only seen in dreams, that day.
She hoped that the San in her dreams and the San she met today were the same person.
Heading to her room, Kang neatly took off her slippers and lay down on the huge bed.
Falling asleep was always scary, and that was still the case.
But today, her expectations surpassed her fear.
So she closed her eyes as if giving in to the sleepiness that was soon to come.
Feeling as if she was floating somewhere, her consciousness started to fade.
The dream was as brutal as always.
No, it was much more horrifying than usual.
And the person she had firmly believed in didn’t appear in her dream.
Thanks to that,
“Aaaaaah!”
The ship had to wake up after a long time of torment in nightmares.
Her heart was in turmoil, and her bodily senses ran amuck as if to incite a fit.
Arms and legs beyond control flailed wildly on top of the blanket.
Kang, barely managing to sit up soaked in cold sweat, expelled rough breaths into the void.
“Haah, haah! Haah……!”
Resentment lost of its destination seeped out, mixed with fear.
“Why……?”
Though she knew it was a laughable matter, if there was a mountain before her eyes, she wanted to pour it all out instantly.
Why didn’t you appear today?
Why didn’t you save me?
Of course, it was not his duty, but her heart had long been lost due to the exploding sorrow and fear.
The pain from the spots where she was hit by the orphanage director, who turned into a monster in her dream, was too vivid.
The sensation of the leather belt winding around her tender skin was enough to violently dig out memories she consciously buried.
It hurt.
“……It hurts so much.”
Kang slowly closed her eyes and wrapped her trembling fingertips around her shoulder.
Come here. I’ll save you.
The sight of a mountain extending a hand swayed and appeared.
So vivid.
Her face is now clear enough to draw.
The him in her dreams disappeared along with the appearance of the him in reality.
She wobbled out of bed.
Then, she went straight to the kitchen, received a full dispenser of ice, received water, and drank it while it trickled down half way.
Her mind snapped to with the numbing cold as if her brain was going to burst.
“Haah.”
Kang, who wiped her wet lips with the back of her hand, headed to the sofa and collapsed. She didn’t even have the energy to walk to the bedroom.
She was trying to fight it somehow, but she was exhausted to the point of feeling her limit.
She hadn’t left anything undone to chase away the nightmares.
Director Hwang personally sought a shaman, dismissing the reality Kang was experiencing as insomnia or sleep disorder, and even had a talisman written at a great ceremony.
Of course, such things were of no help at all.
Injections, medicine, folk remedies, superstitions.
Thinking he’d just wasted money, Director Hwang blew up and turned over the fortuneteller’s place, but he couldn’t vent his anger on Kang.
All he could do was vaguely reprimand her, ‘You need to toughen up. How can you live in this harsh world with such a weak mentality.’
She couldn’t even laugh at the absurdity.
If it were something she could get over with sheer determination, she should have overcome it long ago.
It was she who came back alive from the brink of death not once, not twice, but three times.
She had been confronting the misfortune that had followed her since birth, wondering what else she could do to toughen up her heart.
“It’s miserable.”
Unpleasant thoughts surfaced, only worsening her mood.
Tears welled up along with her anger, forming a thin film.
She rubbed her hot eyelids with the back of her hand, her brows furrowed.
It was most infuriating that sleep poured out even amidst all this.
“All this while, you showed up fine. Why didn’t you today? You just had to reach out.”
The resentful murmur echoed in the dark living room.
“You just had to hold my hand……”
At that moment.
A cold chill twined through the fingers draped over the sofa armrest.
“Like this?”
Simultaneously, she felt the sensation of lips pressing against her fingertips and heard the voice that softly broke the silence.
Kang’s eyes snapped open.
“Ah!”
She screamed, leaping up and frantically clutching her hand as she scanned the surroundings.
The living room was occupied by darkness and no one else.
But she felt an eerie sensation, as if she was not alone.
She definitely heard it.
She definitely felt the presence.
It had directly responded to her whimper that a simple handholding would have sufficed.
‘Like this?’
As if to pacify a child.
As if to ask if she was upset and regretful because it came late, or didn’t save her.
The feeling of it slipping into her hand and making a firm grip was also certain.
But, no matter how much she looked around, she was the only one in this spacious house.
She quietly stared at her palm.
Her trembling gaze slowly slid down to her fingertips.
Although it was a mere moment, the heat of the kiss left by San quickly spread throughout her body, shaking all her senses intensely.
At the moment she confronted his trace so vivid that she couldn’t deny.
Kang was certain.
Han San,
“……”
Had visited.
When scheming men desperately battle for her favor in the male harem
This one’s also on my reread list! The rivalry, scheming between the men in the imperial harem are just as intense and thrilling as in classic palace drama novels, where concubines fight to the death. Give it a read, girls! I promise you won’t be disappointed.
Synopsis:
“I am not worthy of her… but I still want to be by her side, even if only as a loyal dog…”
Those were the painful whispers of Yue Guanyi – the proud Crown Prince of the Great Qi, who was torn between deep love and a guilty conscience. Despite holding the supreme power of the Imperial Guard, he still could not forget the dark past when he was sold into a brothel.
Fate played a cruel twist when Qiu Shuzhi – a young female official who had just passed the imperial examinations with top honors – stepped into his life. She did not know that she was the one who had saved him from a tragic fate many years ago. And now, her heart was the target of pursuit for both Yue Guanyi and the powerful Empress Dowager Qin Qing.
While Yue Guanyi only dared to silently care for and protect the one he loved from afar, the Empress Dowager Qin Qing openly expressed his feelings and did not hesitate to take advantage of his power to approach Qiu Shuzhi. The covert struggle between the two most powerful forces in the imperial court began…
Trigger warning: All men in this novel are yandere style.
_____
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