To You, Whom I Shouldn't Love - Chapter 49

“Noona, isn’t uncle coming today?”

Noah carefully asked while looking at Cassel’s empty seat. The child’s eyes darted around quickly, as if gauging the situation.

Riena, who had been thinking about last night’s dream, reacted a bit late.

“…Huh? What did you say?”

“I asked if uncle isn’t coming today.”

“Mmm, I guess he’s not hungry. Don’t worry and let’s eat.”

The ends of Noah’s eyebrows drooped as he looked at Riena’s expression, which was different from usual.

Noah had become unusually perceptive for his age while being neglected at the Lorraine mansion. Perhaps the child had noticed that something had happened between the two adults.

Riena was about to explain that it wasn’t like that, but stopped herself. Instead, she cut the sausage on Noah’s plate into bite-sized pieces and spread plenty of butter and jam on the bread.

While Noah ate cautiously, Riena left her own food completely untouched. Her mouth felt dry, and even drinks wouldn’t go down.

Noah, who had hurriedly stuffed the remaining bread into his mouth all at once, poked a sausage with his fork and held it out to Riena.

“Huh?”

After chewing and swallowing the bread in his mouth, the child said.

“You should eat too, noona.”

“Noona doesn’t have an appetite…”

Riena was about to say it was okay if she didn’t eat, but seeing Noah becoming gloomy again, she put the sausage in her mouth. Noah smiled broadly with jam on the corners of his mouth.

Riena wiped the child’s face with a napkin.

“Noona is really fine, so don’t worry and eat a lot. Okay?”

“Okay.”

Riena smiled at the child and then looked at the seat across from her, falling into thought again.

It was clearly Riena who had suggested that they take some time to think separately. It was also she who said she wanted to eat separately until her thoughts were sorted out.

Cassel was just being considerate for her sake.

But why did it upset her so much?

She had said they should keep their distance to sort out her thoughts, but she didn’t really know what to sort out or how.

After finishing the meal with a heavy heart, Riena left Noah with the nanny and hesitantly took out some writing paper. The recipient was, of course, Raoul.

Riena first wrote words of apology. She said that there seemed to have been some misunderstanding, and that she was sorry for sending him away so abruptly yesterday.

Then she got to the main point.

Did something happen between you and Cas when you were young? I don’t remember anything special, but I’m asking just in case. I’m also curious if anything happened after that, even if not from childhood.

Finally, she wrote that she wanted to talk in detail in person, but had to ask by letter because she was busy.

After sending the letter through Amy, Riena sat on the terrace and looked out at the garden.

‘At times like this, it’s a bit sad that I don’t have many friends.’

She remembered that when she was young, Count Dyke had tried to make friends for Riena. Thanks to his permission, she was able to interact frequently with Raoul as well.

But when Countess Dyke came to the mansion, even the few friends she had were cut off. Count Dyke had entrusted the overall household affairs to the Countess as the lady of the house, and Riena’s social activities were part of that.

The only remaining friend, Raoul, was able to maintain their connection because he sent letters regularly on his own.

She thought it was okay. There were many children who welcomed her when she went to the village, and there was Lucy, and Joanna too.

When Bianca was in a good mood, she would occasionally socialize with her as well.

But looking back now, she regretted not having a friend to confide in about these feelings.

This mess had happened between Cas and Raoul, whom she thought were her closest friends…

She couldn’t confide in Amy. Although they were close, she was an employee, and above all, a person of the Winkler family.

She couldn’t tell Baroness Donovan either. Talking about this would only give her worries and concerns.

As Riena was lost in thought, staring blankly at the garden, Ryan, who had spotted her, waved his gloved hand vigorously. Riena noticed belatedly and waved back.

Ryan ran up below the terrace.

“Were you admiring the flowers, miss?”

“Mmm.”

Riena made up an excuse. However, her lie must not have been very natural, as Ryan’s face became thoughtful.

“It seems you have some worries.”

Although he must have heard that Riena and Cassel had fought, he didn’t show any sign of knowing.

Riena smiled bitterly.

Usually, she would have made an awkward lie saying it wasn’t true, but today even such empty words wouldn’t come out.

Ryan looked at her silently for a moment, then smiled brightly.

“When I have worries, I look at flowers. When I stare blankly at flowers, peace comes to my heart.”

“Really?”

“So why don’t you come down for a moment and look at the flowers? I know you haven’t properly seen the garden or greenhouse yet, so I’ll guide you.”

To be precise, Riena had been to the garden before. On the first day she came to the mansion, she ran out to the garden, unable to control her emotions.

However, only Cassel knew about that.

Besides, she hadn’t properly seen it other than that, so Ryan was right.

But maybe because of her gloomy mood, she didn’t feel any motivation. She just wanted to sit still and be blank.

When Riena didn’t say anything, Ryan urged her.

“Come on.”

At that moment, Amy, who had approached the terrace, shouted at Ryan.

“Don’t try anything weird with the young lady, Ryan!”

“What do you mean, weird? I’m purely doing this out of concern for the young lady. Amy Carrot! Aren’t you the one thinking strange things?”

“What did I do?”

Riena burst into laughter unexpectedly while listening to the two bickering like siblings.

Amy was surprised at this, and Ryan became triumphant.

“See? I told you I could make the young lady happy.”

“I-is that so?”

Amy lowered her tail.

“Young lady, then would you like to go out for a bit and take a look? I’ll prepare some refreshments in the garden.”

Seeing the two energetic people today made her feel a bit less lethargic. Although her mood was still down, she felt enough strength to go out to the garden.

“Okay, thanks.”

While Amy went to the kitchen, Riena went down to the garden. She thought about calling Noah to look at the flowers together, but he would be in the middle of his lessons by now, so she didn’t.

As Riena entered the garden alone, Ryan, who had already taken off his soil-stained gloves and apron, greeted her.

He bowed with an exaggerated gesture. Riena burst into laughter as she watched Ryan bow deeply and sweep his right arm gracefully.

“Where did you learn such a greeting?”

“From a book. Something like ‘Learning Noble Etiquette Easily for Commoners’, I think that was the title.”

“Is there such a book?”

When Riena opened her eyes wide, Ryan grinned mischievously.

“I’m joking. I saw Madame La Chapelle greeting like this before and imitated it.”

“I thought it was real.”

“Then let’s say such a book really exists.”

He was as smooth as if he had butter on his tongue. When Riena glanced at Ryan slightly, he tried to hold back his laughter as he guided her inside.

As they went a little further in, a white garden swing and a similarly white table came into view.

Ryan spoke with excitement.

“This is the first time we’re using this table.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Usually, afternoon tea parties are held here, but there hasn’t been a lady of the house for quite a long time. It might have been used before, but I haven’t been here for very long. It hasn’t been used by anyone while I’ve been here.”

“I see.”

“From now on, since you’ll be using it often, I should take even better care of this place.”

As Riena sat down in the chair, receiving Ryan’s clumsy escort, Amy, who had already arrived, spread a white cloth on the table.

Soon after, maids brought in trolleys loaded with refreshments.

Whether it was because they had prepared a lot for Noah, who likes desserts, or out of consideration for Riena’s low mood, there were more diverse desserts than usual on the table. There were even two teapots.

However, there was only one teacup prepared.

“This seems a bit much for me to eat alone, won’t you two join me?”

When she asked Ryan and Amy, the two looked a bit surprised.

“Is it okay for us to do that? It would be an honor, but…”

“What’s wrong with it? Wouldn’t it be a bit sad for me to have tea time alone in such a nice place?”

Ryan, who regained his composure before Amy, nodded.

“Of course. We can’t make the young lady sad, so we’ll join you.”

“Sigh.”

Amy sighed as she watched Ryan plop down in a chair. But instead of saying anything to him, she went into the mansion saying she would bring more tea sets.

Riena called out after her.

“Tell them to bring snacks to Noah too.”

“Yes!”