He wasn’t angry about the current situation. Instead, he harbored resentment for the past, for the incident where he broke the last promise. Had he given up hiding his true identity? Roger’s gaze towards me revealed the anger and resentment from that past incident.

I took a deep breath.

“There’s a reason, there are circumstances.”

“If there are circumstances, does everything become acceptable?”

“Today, I can’t stay by Roger’s side. It’s true that Roger is an important person to me, but…”

Roger waited for my words.

“Roger is not the only important person to me.”

While I should apologize to Roger, I didn’t want to neglect the precious person by my side because of it.

“…Do you know how miserable it makes people feel?”

“But if I’m talking about that day, it was my fault for breaking the promise. I know that it made Roger difficult and lonely.”

“…”

“So, if I stay by your side, I want to apologize until the end and be there for you. That’s how it has always been.”

Forgetting the wounded hand, I clenched my fist. When I quickly opened my hand after wiping the dry blood, the wound had reopened. I was shocked to see the hand, now more lively and full of blood than before.

“…You.”

Roger was the same. After inspecting the surroundings, he grabbed my arm to prevent me from touching the wound. He tried to find a cloth to treat the wound hastily, but there was nothing suitable.

“What if a shard goes deeper while moving!”

Even though his words were harsh, his actions were gentle. He held onto my arm to prevent me from moving. Only later did he realize he hadn’t used honorifics and was surprised. His eyes, meeting mine, widened in embarrassment.

“…Roger.”

He flinched at my voice.

“I actually had a lot to say to you. I had prepared a lot.”

“…”

“But the thing I wanted to say the most is, I’m sorry, really sorry, Roger.”

Tears fell on the back of the hand that he held. Even if I pretended otherwise, meeting Roger after a long time made me happy. And thinking about the young Roger waiting for me with an anxious heart in the slow passage of time, I felt guilty.

“Really, I was wrong.”

“…”

I was happiest when I met you and Yurik. The end of that precious time always weighed heavily on my heart.

Even if I held my breath to stop crying, my shoulders trembled more than before. Roger turned away from that sight. The grip on my hand gradually loosened.

“Once your hand is treated, you should go.”

“…”

Are we parting ways again? I didn’t apologize properly. There are many things to say, and it’s true that I had prepared things to say. I don’t want to part like this.

As I helplessly stood there, Roger glanced at me.

“…When you’re calm, whether it’s Theus or Jonsegu, contact me through them.”

“…”

“If at that time, you’re still hurting and crying, you have to deal with it yourself.”

⭐⭐⭐

The treatment ended faster than I thought.

After removing the glass shards, a needle and thread were passed through the torn gap to suture the wound. The problem was the hallucinogen used to minimize pain. It had side effects.

I came to nurse but ended up lying on the hospital bed, groaning in pain. It felt like experiencing hell once with severe dizziness and abdominal pain.

I groaned. Roger, who had come to nurse me, lay down in the hospital bed and groaned miserably. It was as if I had returned after experiencing a long time in hell.

He groaned while watching me cry again, even though I had just wiped away the tears in front of Roger. Roger clicked his tongue, looking at me with a pitiful gaze. It was quite embarrassing.

“…Roger, I’m really sorry.”

The most embarrassing thing was this damn mouth of mine. Words popped out without going through my thoughts, and it was frustrating.

I felt a sense of separation between my body and soul, and my mind felt distant from the field of view. This state had continued for three hours.

As much as I wanted to bind my lips like I did my hands, it was impossible.

“Does that damn apology automatically pop up when you see my face now?”

“Roger… Ugh.”

“Let’s not talk.”

It’s not my will to apologize. He lay on the bed in his own room, watching me, then turned his back, resting his waist.

Oh, I have to go see Yurik… I have to go to Penton to get the peanut jam in my bag….
I looked out the window at the snowy weather. The hazy and cloudy dark sky beyond the window felt abyssal.

As I gazed at that color, Yurik’s face came to mind, and the ugly face of my father also flashed in my thoughts.

If the side effects don’t improve and I stay in the hospital like this, my father will mistakenly think that I’ve continued the acquaintance from today and even extended it to an overnight stay, and he’ll be delighted.

I wanted to avoid that situation at all costs.

Then, a dream-like and distant clarity returned.

“Ah!”

“…”

As I tried to sit up, I ended up falling under the bed.

“What… are you doing?”

“…”