“Der…”

Damion lifted his head. Ansi’s elder brother’s name flowed from her dry, painfully furrowed lips. It seemed she was searching for her elder brother, uncertain if he was alive or wandering in a dream.

Damion pressed his lips tightly and replaced the damp cloth. Even after switching the quickly heated cloth with a cold one, Ansi’s expression did not improve.

He slowly wiped Ansi’s body with the cloth. Ansi shivered. However, he continued moving the cold cloth to try to bring down the fever enveloping her entire body, even a little.

Kardian’s question rang in Damion’s ears.

Is Ansi truly happy by my side. Damion could not confidently answer that question. No, he was afraid to answer.

Because he knew that regardless of his answer, it would be the wrong one for Ansi.

Ansi slowly opened her eyes. The red light of dawn was seeping through the cracks of the window. She removed the cold, damp cloth from her forehead and lifted her body.

She frowned. Her whole body ached. But the fever that had engulfed her had subsided.

In truth, it didn’t really matter. No, having a fever was better. Then she could fall asleep without other thoughts. She could rationalize suspending judgment under the pretext of being sick.

However, the fever had already lifted, and Ansi had to think again.

The threat to kill Der would not be empty words. Given how easily he killed his wife Bekishi, how much easier would it be with Der?

She knew betraying Damion again was not an option. But she also could not abandon Der. The best course would be to retrieve Der first and then come clean to Damion about everything.

Ansi slipped out of bed.

As she set foot on the floor, pain shot through her body as if it would shatter.

“Ah…!”

Ansi reflexively let out a groan.

Then she sensed someone’s presence. The moment Ansi raised her head, her eyes met with the man rising from the sofa.

Ansi’s gaze wavered. She could not tell how long he had been there. Judging from his sunken eyes, he had kept watch for a long while.

No, in fact she could not be certain of that either.

Recently, Damion always had that sort of face.

Suddenly, Ansi thought that the man was withering away more and more. As if someone was wringing out his happiness and vitality.

“Are you alright?”

The man approached Ansi and supported her. A cracked voice emerged from his dry lips. She could not read if the emotion revealed in his sunken eyes was worry or reprimand.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Ansi found herself defensively answering while shaking off Damion’s hand. Then she froze for a moment. She knew he disliked this kind of response.

She was about to open her mouth to add something.

“Okay.”

Damion readily replied.

Instead, he took the thermometer he had placed on the side table and grasped Ansi’s arm again. Ansi reflexively pulled back. Damion, holding her body, pulled down the nightgown Ansi was wearing.

“The fever has gone down.”

A subtle shame rose. Ansi blocked Damion’s hand, but Damion lifted her arm regardless to take her temperature.

“It’s down enough to not be a concern.”

Damion muttered while looking at the notably lower temperature compared to yesterday. Sighing with relief, he set down the thermometer.

He buttoned up Ansi’s clothes and gazed at her silently.

Ansi, who expected to reject him more strongly, was unexpectedly docile. However, as if she disliked looking at his face, she had turned her head to the opposite side of Damion.

Resignation was deeply permeated in her face.

And even now, at the end of her gaze, Damion did not exist.

Instead of turning her face to look at him, Damion posed a question.

“Did you meet Kardian yesterday?”

Ansi flinched. Damion could predict her next reaction. She would get angry thinking it was the result of surveillance. She would pour out a contemptuous gaze with a sharp face. As she always had.

However, Ansi’s actions were completely different from expected.

“…”

Ansi did not answer.

Damion lowered his gaze and stared at the back of her hand. The hand tightly grasping the hem of her clothes was trembling.

Like someone gripped by fear.

Ansi recalled the eyes that had been watching her from all sides.

She thought she had evaded those gazes on the way to the study, but she was wrong. Seeing that Damion knew, in the end someone had been watching her.

That fact made Ansi sink into even greater unease. She realized once again that an inescapable net of surveillance was cast over her every moment.

Under the gaze of this man who could not trust her, the fact that she had to neglect Der’s death without being able to do anything hit her.

Then Ansi became unbearably afraid.

“Ansi.”

Damion reached out and grasped Ansi’s trembling hand.

He had not asked the question expecting this reaction from Ansi. He just wanted to talk. To reveal what each had hidden from the other and pour everything out.

But as a result, Ansi was trembling.

Damion was seized by a feeling as if he had committed a great sin against her. He wanted to erase the trembling of this hand. He caressed Ansi’s hand that had turned cold.

His heart grew impatient.

Damion posed a more direct question.

“Is there evidence that your elder brother is alive?”

Ansi’s gaze wavered.

She parted her lips slightly.

A hope raised its head that perhaps Damion was asking for evidence because he was willing to help her.

But she knew well that it was a futile hope. Just a few days ago, had Damion not crushed her hope? And had he not made everyone in the mansion watch her?

She could not know how he intended to hold her this time.

“Are you really curious about evidence?”

“…Yes.”

“You won’t believe it anyway.”

Ansi spoke with conviction. Her belief in distrust was firm.

Damion felt suffocated.

What the evidence was that Der was alive was not important. More important was whether he could believe Ansi’s words without such a thing.

If he truly trusted her, he would believe her words without doubt, and if he could not trust her, he would consider it a lie even if Der was brought before his eyes.

And he had already lost his chance. He had ignored and dismissed her words. Ansi no longer had expectations of such a Damion.

“What should I… do?”

A vague question slipped from his lips.

It was also what Damion most wanted an answer to right now.

What should I do so you won’t tremble like this. What should I do to quell my anxiety. What should I do… for us to achieve the life we hoped for.

Last night, while keeping watch by Ansi’s side, Damion thought endlessly about her. Ansi, overcome by fever, had wept searching for her elder brother. It pained his heart to see her like that. He wanted to erase the despair and sadness on her face, but Damion did not know how.

Right now, he grasped nothing in his hands. Happiness slipped through his hands like water. He hoped Ansi would present that solution.

However, Ansi spoke in a voice filled with despair.

“You have no intention of doing anything for me anyway. So… please, don’t stop me.”

It was a plea but mixed with immense resignation. Her blue eyes were empty. The blue eyes that had been like a vast ocean had now discolored like a dry, cracked earth.

Suddenly Damion realized.

That he was unhappy right now.

And that this woman was the same.

He just… wanted to be together with Ansi, for a long time. For that, he had stopped and confined Ansi. For his happiness. For her happiness.

When he was with Ansi, he could be happy. So he had made this woman his life’s purpose. He had wanted to spend his life with her.

However… Ansi was unhappy now.

So starkly.

“…He said if I let you go, he would spare Der.”

A subdued voice flowed from Damion. Repressing emotions as much as possible, he only stated the facts that needed to be conveyed now.

“I searched places that might be holding your elder brother but he wasn’t there. Kardian, whom I encountered there, proposed it. That if I let you go, he would return your elder brother.”

Ansi swallowed dryly.

She thought Damion did not believe her words at all. So she considered there was no longer a possibility of saving Der together with Damion.

But if that was not the case…

“Damion.”

“Leave me, Ansi.”

Ansi’s eyes trembled.

“You were going to anyway.”

Damion gripped her hand with his eyes downcast.

His reason for living was Ansi.

Then… if this woman was happy, could he also be happy?

Last night, with that realization, Damion had decided to let Ansi go. If what Ansi needed now was not himself but Der, he had resolved to readily release her.

“I…”

Ansi slowly shook her head.

“I didn’t want to leave you.”

Her voice quivered faintly. Ignoring this with effort, Damion continued.

“Holding onto you was my greed. So leave me, Ansi.”