Among the male leads, Hillstain, with his silver hair, was the most impolite and ill-mannered.
In the original story, when I died,
—“If you let me hold you tonight, it will comfort you.”
He was the very man who had uttered such words.
Was that even reasonable? To someone grieving over a dead friend!
At first glance, his voice was melodious and his dimpled smile gentle, making him appear affable—but Hillstain’s demeanor shifted drastically depending on whether he was smiling or not.
That very charm was the secret to his popularity, yet in a different sense from Edan, he was utterly insane.
An addict to the pleasure of healing. A pervert who experimented the most at night and tormented Ivy with the crudest methods.
Anyway, Hillstain ignored Ruben’s greeting entirely and bluntly blurted out whatever he wanted to say. I shrank further into myself and hid behind Ruben’s back.
Meanwhile, Ruben responded calmly to Hillstain’s question.
“I am hiding nothing.”
Then I heard Hillstain’s soft chuckle, followed by the sound of a sword being drawn.
Startled, I reflexively turned my head—only to see a long sword whirling through the air.
“Saying that just makes me more curious.”
Hillstain took one deliberate step closer toward us.
And for the briefest moment, I felt Ruben’s back twitch.
It was such a minuscule movement—I would never have noticed it had I not been pressed tightly against him.
Slowly lifting my head, I saw the sharp blade of a sword positioned between Ruben’s neck vertebrae.
I wasn’t sure whether it had pierced his throat, but judging from Ruben’s earlier reaction, it seemed clear he’d been nicked.
My entire body trembled. I summoned every ounce of strength just to keep myself from collapsing.
Still, my lips dried completely, and I gripped the flagpole tightly.
‘Why is everyone here insane? Is it going to hurt you to just use words?’
With a sword pointed at someone else’s neck, Hillstain leisurely added a soft chuckle and commanded,
“Bring out whatever’s behind your back.”
“I apologize. I cannot do that.”
“Even though I ordered you to?”
“I refuse to comply.”
That was when—
Hillstain’s sword rose to Ruben’s chin and began slowly tracing across his skin.
I instantly held my breath.
“Working under that unlucky bastard must be rubbing off on you. Right, Ruben? Since when did you become so ill-mannered?”
Giggling mockingly, Hillstain deliberately chose provocative words to provoke Ruben, who valued Edan more than his own life—but Ruben didn’t move an inch.
Even though the blade must have hurt, he stood rigidly like stone, as if numb to pain, shielding me in front.
‘Ruben…’
Ruben could never raise his sword against Hillstain.
Hillstain was Captain of the Imperial Knights and the Crown Prince’s right-hand man. Thus, any misstep risked branding Ruben a traitor—a particularly sensitive issue since Edan was a bastard prince locked in hostility with his elder brother, the Crown Prince. Hillstain, fully aware of this, always exploited his advantageous position and spoke again.
“Step aside.”
“I refuse to comply.”
“Didn’t I say it was an order? How many times must I repeat it?”
“No matter how many times you ask, my answer remains the same. I cannot step aside.”
As this tense standoff continued, blood finally began seeping from Ruben’s chin.
Hillstain, who had only been lightly grazing the skin, now pressed harder with the hand gripping his sword.
‘Crazy…!’
Ruben’s wound felt like it was scraping against my own conscience.
Hillstain didn’t even know who I was—was it right to keep hiding like this?
Gritting my teeth and holding my breath, I decided to stop hiding.
Just as I prepared to step one foot sideways—
I felt Ruben’s arm tense as he sensed my movement—and simultaneously, the sharp clash of steel against steel rang out.
“…?!”
Hillstain, Ruben, and I all turned our heads in unison.
Hillstain’s sword had flown far away, landing against a stone wall—alongside another sword drenched in blood.
Confirming this, the three of us naturally shifted our gazes toward where the swords had come from.
There stood Edan, drenched in monster blood.
“Greet me.”
Without even properly looking at Hillstain, Edan uttered the words in a low voice.
Then, taking a handkerchief from a subordinate following behind him, he briskly wiped his hands.
The handkerchief became soaked with thick, sticky blood. After roughly wiping his hands, Edan casually wiped away blood spatter on his cheek and handed the cloth back to the soldier.
Only then, after sweeping his hair back, did he finally look at Hillstain.
No—more precisely, at me first, then Ruben’s chin, and finally Hillstain.
“Greet. Me.”
Dissatisfied, Edan repeated the same phrase twice—until Hillstain finally placed a hand on his shoulder and bowed deeply.
“Hillstain Mathias greets His Highness Prince Edan Dietrich, Star of the Empire.”
Normally, one should reciprocate such a greeting—but Edan remained silent.
Hillstain, waiting, lifted his head—and precisely on cue, Edan spoke.
“Sir.”
“Yes, Your Highness.”
“Who told you to lift your head?”
At this sudden fault-finding, Hillstain’s eyebrows twitched.
“Your greeting displeases me. Again.”
Edan ostentatiously slipped one hand into his pocket and stood with one leg casually crossed, his posture absurdly arrogant despite his elegant tone.
“I greet you again after a long time.”
Hillstain bowed once more to Edan. And Edan said,
“Deeper.”
His icy tone carried the implicit threat that he might kill Hillstain if the bow wasn’t satisfactory.
I saw Hillstain’s shoulders twitch. Though he hesitated briefly, he soon lowered his head and shoulders even deeper.
Edan, apparently intent on humiliating him, left him like that for a while before slowly speaking.
“I thought you had no business coming north. What brings you here?”
His words were even more impolite than Hillstain’s. Fortunately, his question implied Hillstain could now lift his head—so Hillstain finally straightened himself.
When he raised his head, all traces of his usual smile had vanished, replaced by humiliation.
“I sent multiple invitations to the Grand Duke’s Castle, but received no reply—so Crown Prince Killian ordered me to come and obtain a definite answer.”
“What invitations?”
“You didn’t receive them? The matter is widely known throughout the Empire.”
Edan tilted his head as if annoyed—staring down at Hillstain with an arrogant gaze, as if to say, “Why are you questioning me instead of just answering?”
“Sir. Did I ask you that?”
“My apologies. Regarding the Grand Holy Maiden’s celebratory ball…”
Interrupting Hillstain’s calm reply, Edan jerked his chin.
“Bring it.”
Not only cutting him off, but issuing a command without context or explanation.
Frowning, Hillstain followed Edan’s chin gesture with his eyes.
It pointed toward where the two fallen swords lay.
‘He must be really pissed off.’
Edan was furious that Hillstain had provoked Ruben—and was now deliberately toying with him through his capricious behavior.
Suppressing his anger with patience, Hillstain walked toward where the swords had fallen. He sheathed one—his own—and brought the other to Edan.
“I shall attend, out of courtesy.”
Courtesy, my ass. You’re going to see Ivy.
A faint, bitter smile appeared at Hillstain’s lips—he surely thought the same as I did.
“I shall convey that. I look forward to seeing you at the ball.”
When Edan gave a slight nod, Hillstain finally turned to leave.
But just as the portal opened and Hillstain stepped toward it, he suddenly turned back toward us.
“Your Highness, excuse me—but may I ask what you’re hiding behind Ruben?”
You idiot! Just leave! Please, just go! Drop your damn curiosity!
As attention returned to me, I gripped the flagpole even tighter with trembling hands.
Edan slowly walked over and casually leaned against the defensive wall beside me. Then, turning his head ostentatiously to look at me, he smiled as if amused by a new toy.
Since I was hidden behind Ruben, Hillstain clearly couldn’t see me—so Edan was definitely teasing or provoking him.
“Of course, you may ask.”
“Then please tell me—”
“But you must pay a price.”
“…A price?”
Anxiously, I avoided Edan’s gaze and secretly stole a glance at Hillstain.
Hillstain was forcing a smile, but his subtle displeasure was unmistakable.
“If you offer one of your arms as monster feed.”
It was an absurd condition.
Hillstain’s lips, slightly parted while speaking, snapped shut. His previously smiling eyes had now turned cold.
“If that’s the condition, I must decline. Then, farewell.”
Hillstain vanished into the portal.
The moment he left, all strength drained from my body, and I collapsed onto the floor.
With the tension released, pain finally registered—and the cold I’d forgotten returned in full force.
By now, pure white snowflakes were fluttering gently from the sky.
“Beautiful…”
It wasn’t the time for poetic appreciation, but exhaustion had piled up, clouding my thoughts. After all, I’d written resignation letters to escape, and so much had happened… though, ultimately, I’d failed.
Suddenly, my vision spun—and I fainted on the spot.
[This is the timeline separator]I’d failed to escape. Edan was on the verge of going mad. And I’d even run into Hillstain—everything was a mess.
Another nightmare. In my dream, I was flailing helplessly, stuck in a muddy pit.
“Hah…!”
I gasped awake, panting.
But either I hadn’t fully woken—or perhaps I’d slipped into another dream.
“Edan…?”
His shimmering golden hair glowed in the sunlight right before my eyes.
Flawless skin—even up close, no pores visible—neatly groomed eyebrows, a sharp nose… perfectly long eyelashes, soft eyelids, and lips so perfectly shaped. Edan’s appearance was utterly beyond criticism. Look at that jawline—even lying sideways, how could it remain so sharp?
And along his neck, thick veins pulsed visibly. His collarbones exuded sexiness, his broad shoulders led to thick, firm forearms… and resting atop his magnificent chest—my own hand.
“…?”
Turns Out He’s Been Secretly in Love with Me
One-line summary: He acts like he doesn’t like her but is actually playing hard to get.
Synopsis:
Xu Muzhou like her. He has liked her for a very long time, and through repeated schemes, he finally closed the distance with her.
But this is still far from enough.
He wants to be the one who stands out among her many suitors, to fight for her attention, and to make her take the initiative to pursue him.
_____
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