“X month XX day, winter.

Today, Sophie betrayed me.

She says Oscar is Alex’s son, and that she’s been secretly meeting him since they came down to the duchy together.

How could Sophie do this to me? I really thought of her as a true sister…

My heart aches from being betrayed by a dear friend. She says she never once thought of me as a friend, and that she followed me from the start with this purpose… It makes me even sadder and brings tears to my eyes.

The mental anguish seems to have transferred to my body, as I have a fever and feel dizzy.”

“X month XX day, summer.

Demian came to see me with flowers.

My beloved son, it seems he’s very worried since his incompetent mother has been ill for years now. I don’t know who he takes after to be so kind.

Lena cried, telling me to pull myself together for Demian’s sake, who is only three years old.

She’s right. To protect my young child, a mother shouldn’t be this weak.

Moreover, I heard that while I’ve been lying sick, Sophie has been going around the duchy as she pleases.

As if she were the duchess herself.

At this rate, I might lose everything to her. Even Demian’s things. I can’t let that happen.

For Demian’s sake, I must stand up.”

“XX month, XX day winter.

What is it called when someone who committed a crime acts shamelessly instead?

Sophie demanded that I divorce Alex. She says she doesn’t want to make her son an illegitimate child. That he can’t call his father ‘Dad’ even though he is his father.

What does that have to do with me? Sophie betrayed me first, so I have no intention of giving in.

Don’t be ridiculous, Sophie. I will absolutely not divorce Alex. Who would that benefit?

I will endure. For our Demian, I will endure until the end and surely take back everything to give to my son.

You and Alex can never be happy.”

“X month XX day, early spring.

Demian collapsed after being poisoned.

I can do nothing as the child groans in pain, turning pale blue.

It’s miserable.

I’m sorry, Demian. Because mother is powerless, because I’m not strong enough to protect you…

If only I could, I would die in your place.

My precious treasure, please don’t leave mother.”

“X month XX day, early spring.

Christina left me and went to Sophie.

But I don’t even have the energy to feel betrayed now. Because Demian still hasn’t regained consciousness.

All I can do is hold his small hand and pray.

God, please save our Demian.”

“X month XX day, early spring.

Sophie proposed a deal with the antidote.

She tells me to go back to being a living corpse and not come out of my room. To do nothing like before, just live while only breathing.

Then she’ll save Demian.

How can you be so cruel, Sophie? You and I were once friends, and now we’re both mothers with children.

No matter how much I hate you, I never thought of harming your son. Because as a fellow mother, I know how terrible that would be.

But you… You don’t even have that minimum decency.

Why did I trust someone like this and come all the way here? I should have listened when Dad and my brothers tried to stop me.

Still, I don’t regret it. If I hadn’t married Alex, I wouldn’t have met Demian.

I won’t regret anything.

Because everything was my choice.”

“X month XX day, early spring.

Demian opened his eyes.

The child thinks he woke up after suffering badly from the flu.

Thank goodness.

For now, it’s okay if you don’t know anything, Demian.”

“X month XX day, summer.

The maids are gradually leaving me. That’s probably because I’m an incompetent master.

Using depression as an excuse, I’ve shut myself in my room, but it feels like I’m really getting depressed.

I feel so, so depressed.

But I don’t want to die. Because I have to see Demian grow up.

I may be weak, but I won’t leave you behind.”

“X month XX day, autumn.

Only when Demian comes to see me do I feel that I’m alive.

The hope of my life, a single ray of light.

However, seeing a child who is mature beyond his years keeps bringing tears to my eyes.

Because I can see how much this small, young child is struggling and trying so hard out there on his own. And yet, there’s nothing I can do for him.

If we endure the current hardships, will a bright future come to us someday?

I truly hope so.”

“XX month XX day, winter.

Sophie gave me tea as a gift.

The tea brewed with dark red leaves was too sweet and had a strong aroma.

I didn’t want to drink it again, but I had no right to refuse.

I don’t know what her intention was, but I have to keep drinking this. Even the maid by my side now is already Sophie’s person.

At least I’m glad she didn’t give it to Demian.

Perhaps Sophie was aiming for me to feel this way?”

“X month XX day, spring.

These days, I constantly feel dazed and my body feels heavy.

I have nightmares every night and my nerves are on edge.

I used to be a composed person.

Why am I like this…?”

“X month XX day, summer.

I can feel my health gradually getting worse.

It’s been like this since I started drinking Sophie’s tea.

I need to hold on until Demian grows up…

Will I be able to?”

“XX month XX day, late autumn.

Hearing that I was unwell, the former Duke Vandermir came to visit.

He shed tears, apologizing on behalf of his son and daughter-in-law.

I asked him to protect Demian. If he was truly sorry, to return everything to Demian at least.

He said he understood, and asked if there was anything else I needed. So I also asked him to leave some property under the name of Cyan Mondor.

Cyan Mondor.

In my naive days, I did many things under this name.

I was truly happy. Back then, the world felt like it was mine, and everything around me was always bright as if night would never come.

So even if I’m gone, I hope this name remains to support Demian.”

“XX month XX day, winter.

I can’t sleep due to insomnia.

Drinking the tea helps me fall asleep somewhat, but I feel like I’m becoming more and more lethargic and on edge.”

“X month XX day, spring

Sometimes I feel suffocated even when I’m just sitting still in my room.

For no reason, I end up screaming and thrashing about.

I can feel myself gradually changing.”

“X month XX day, early summer.

What should I do for Demian’s birthday this year?

Last year, I ruined the party he was looking forward to because I had a fit.

I felt so, so sorry.

But Mom didn’t mean to do that either. I don’t want to have fits like that.

But I’m scared because I don’t know why I’m like this.”

“X month XX day, summer.

Sophie has been visiting me frequently lately.

She smiles with satisfaction as she observes my pale complexion.

I’m just afraid.”

“X month XX day, summer.

Today is the last day I’ll see you.

Sophie said that as soon as she saw my face. And then she revealed the true nature of the tea she gifted me.

She says it was made with black magic. When consumed, it sharpens your nerves and makes you suffer terrible mental anguish.

She says that with long-term consumption like mine, even brainwashing is possible.

I finally understood why my condition had been strange all this time. Sophie had been slowly, gradually killing me.

But now she wanted to end it, so Sophie, who was once a close friend and sister, looked me straight in the eyes and said:

Monica, kill yourself tomorrow night.

…I cannot refuse those words.”

The final diary entry that followed was essentially a letter left for Demian. Arasila, who had been reading, closed the diary and tilted her head back.

As her violet hair flowed down, her reddened eyes were revealed.

‘Demian’s mother was murdered.’

How much more painful would it be for Demian, who had already been in agony thinking his mother took her own life, to know this truth?

While worried that he might blame himself for this, a burning anger towards the current Duke and Duchess welled up.

‘They’re worse than beasts.’

As much as she wanted to take this diary and report them immediately, it wasn’t the right time yet.

After Demian returns, she had to leave the choice to him. If only to respect Monica’s final letter.

‘What I need to do now isn’t to take revenge in her stead. It’s to prepare the foundation to defeat our common enemy.’

Arasila, having composed herself, put the diary back in the jewel box and cast a locking spell. So that no one but her could open it.

Even when something that feels like the world is crumbling happens, the actual world keeps turning as usual.

The magic tower she returned to after her vacation was unchanged, unlike how greatly Arasila’s life had been altered.

Sally and Rudy greeted her warmly as she came to work after nearly three weeks.

“Senior, I missed you so much!”

“Welcome back. I cleaned your desk while you were away, senior.”

“Thank you, Rudy. I missed you too, Sally.”

Arasila smiled brightly. Though her face seemed unchanged, it had become slightly gaunt, but the two didn’t mention it.

This was because Eric had advised beforehand that it would be best not to bring up anything related to Demian in front of Arasila.

It was truly appropriate advice. Arasila didn’t want to stir up the emotions she had barely managed to calm either.

“It’s been a while, Lady Vandermir.”

Eric, who appeared behind Sally and Rudy, greeted her gently.

“Ah, Young Lord Roberts. Have you been well?”

“Of course, it’s nice to see you again. I actually had something to tell you regarding our research.”

Eric smiled softly and naturally shifted the topic to work. Arasila responded willingly.

“I found a plant with similar characteristics to the Dilai flower. I was thinking of experimenting with what we’ve researched so far using it, what do you think?”

“Of course, that sounds good.”

While Arasila was away attending the New Year’s festival and on vacation, the remaining three had diligently continued their research.

They explored how to cultivate and manage the Dilai flower to extend its lifespan.

They had obtained somewhat useful and positive results, and now planned to apply and modify those findings by testing them on similar plants.

“I’ll send you the experiment reports every week.”

“Yes, thank you.”

“It’s nothing. Oh, but do you know something, my lady?”

“What is it?”

Arasila looked up at Eric in confusion.

“Sally and Rudy were really looking forward to your return. That’s probably why you were able to finish your vacation well and come back, I think.”

Eric spoke each word with careful consideration. With a kind and mature smile, he added:

“Originally, when you wait patiently and earnestly, good results always follow.”

“…Is that so?”

“Yes, it always is. That’s how it’s been every time I research. Well then, I’ll go conduct the experiment now.”

Eric, who had offered gentle consolation in a roundabout way, left his seat.

Arasila realized that her juniors’ somewhat calm attitude towards her was thanks to him and felt grateful.

And so, Arasila returned to the same daily routine as before the New Year’s festival.

She had ordinary conversations with the people in the research lab, commuted regularly on weekdays, and ate her meals properly from morning to evening.

Outwardly, she seemed to be waiting for her husband with composure. In reality, there were no strange signs visible either.

Only, she developed a habit of compulsively checking the newspaper three times a day, and a habit of secretly turning on the lights while pretending to be asleep with the curtains drawn.

The former was in case there might be any small news related to Demian, who had gone to the northern battlefront, and the latter was for meetings to investigate Frederick and the Lester ducal family behind the scenes.

The main members of that meeting were Arasila, Colin, and Riley.

In fact, Arasila had planned to keep Riley locked up in the shed with Brady, and use him when needed.

However,

‘I don’t want money or anything! I just want revenge for my comrades! Please use me in any way, sister!’

Riley had knelt down and pleaded first.

He emphasized that he had various skills and was good at gathering information, so he would be useful.

His gaze was so earnest yet determined.

There was no harm in having someone to secretly use, and judging by his personality that valued loyalty, he didn’t seem likely to run away leaving Brady behind.

So after some deliberation, Arasila accepted Riley as a temporary subordinate.

“Sister, I followed Miller and heard him boasting drunkenly that he’d become the Knight Commander if the Emperor changed!”

Riley’s eyes shone as he spoke. Unlike his somewhat naive-looking personality, he was unexpectedly meticulous when it came to work-related matters.

Even Colin, who was initially reluctant about Riley joining, now evaluated him fairly positively.

“I see. It seems Lord Miller was promised the Knight Commander position in exchange for cooperating with the Crown Prince.”

The current Knight Commander, Ben Dyke, was not particularly old.

Moreover, he had no notable misconduct and his reputation was good, so it would be safe to assume he wouldn’t be stepping down from the Knight Commander position for a while.

Even if the Emperor changed, he wasn’t someone who would be pushed out.

By the time Ben Dyke reached retirement age, Joseph Miller would also be somewhat old to become Knight Commander.

Yet the fact that he boasted like that clearly meant he had received some promise from someone who wanted to take the throne.

After Riley’s report, Colin’s report followed.

“There’s nothing new from the Lester ducal family yet. However, they weren’t particularly close with the Grant marquis family in the past.”

“There must be a reason they’ve become close recently. The fact that they’ve grown closer to Marquis Grant means they needed the Crown Prince’s power.”

The three ducal families, known as the pillars of the empire, had no reason to curry favor with the imperial family.

And it’s not like the Lester ducal family was originally close to the imperial family either.

There must be a reason they joined hands with Frederick to the extent of participating in dangerous treason. Colin bowed his head, saying he would investigate in more detail.

Confirming that the night was deep, she sent the two of them away.

Left alone, Arasila turned off the lamp light and approached the window, pulling back the curtains. Her face, gazing at the full moon hanging in the sky, was somewhat troubled.

Although the Hugo marquis family was helping, and Colin and Riley were doing their best within their capabilities—

‘It’s not enough just us. It would be good if there was even one more person who shared our intentions.’

She simply couldn’t shake off such thoughts.

Arasila’s side needed someone in a higher position. But how easy would it be to find such a person?

Moreover, it was a matter of dealing with the Crown Prince and ducal family who were likely preparing for treason.

There wouldn’t be anyone willing to step forward readily.

Unless they had a friend’s life at stake like Riley, or served Demian as their master like Colin, or were family to him like Arasila.

That’s why even Arasila couldn’t easily ask for help from those around her this time, and was struggling to figure things out on her own.

Believing that if it wasn’t enough, she just had to put in that much more effort.

However, life is truly mysterious, and sometimes what you wish for comes true at unexpected moments.

Or you end up receiving help from completely unexpected places, from entirely unexpected people.

The person who would fill the part Arasila felt was lacking arrived in early spring, when fresh green buds were blooming on tree branches that had been bare all winter.