“Is it refreshing?”

“Yes, not there… a little higher up.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

Splash, splash.

The sound of water echoed from the silver basin. The fragrance of white sandalwood and pomegranate crushed in palm oil wafted gently through the bedchamber.

I was enjoying some well-ripened red grapes while entrusting my smooth feet, devoid of any calluses, to Derek.

Even I had to admit my adaptability was remarkable.

‘Aside from the inconvenience of not having magic, living as an empress is quite nice.’

I was, after all, merely a figurehead empress who didn’t even have to work.

With power, backing, and devoted servants at my disposal, there was no need for any troublesome struggles.

This level of human existence was quite manageable.

“Um, Your Majesty.”

“Yes?”

“There’s something I’d like to ask…”

And the one responsible for the greatest pillar of my comfortable life was this knight, Derek Noert.

He was truly sensitive to my every gesture and glance, striving to fulfill my every wish.

Just look at today.

It was unthinkable for a guard knight to wash feet and give foot massages. If it were known that other noble houses treated their guard knights this way, the world would be turned upside down.

Knights were a proud bunch, and even for a lord they deeply respected, they wouldn’t easily kneel.

Let alone washing feet.

However, Derek prepared warm water and fragrant oil at my single word without complaint. Moreover, he carefully attended to me with a look of gratitude in his eyes.

I was quite satisfied, so there was no reason not to answer his question.

“You may ask anything.”

“The other day… you refused His Majesty the Emperor’s visit, didn’t you?”

“Yes, I did.”

“Are you… alright with that?”

At first listen, his tone seemed quite concerned. But at my age, how could I not perceive the hidden meaning in his words?

Derek was hoping I was unbothered.

It was rather cute how he was asking, hoping that not even a teaspoon of affection for the Emperor remained.

I tilted my head slightly and gave him a smile with my eyes.

“I’m accustomed to being served, you know.”

“…”

“I no longer wish to serve anyone. Even romantic love is a form of service to me.”

I was originally quite an impudent youngest sister even to my older sisters.

The only one I truly respected was my eldest sister.

Other than her, there was no one before whom I would bow my head.

Whether I became weak, became human, lost my magic, or even if a blade forged of holy power was about to pierce my soul and annihilate me.

I was born not knowing how to bow.

Enrique was the sole exception to this for me.

“So the answer is simple. Whatever the Emperor does now, not only am I unbothered, but I wouldn’t mind never seeing his face again for the rest of my life.”

At my clear answer, Derek’s hands paused momentarily before resuming their movement.

‘He really is like a winter bear.’

His build, his height, his muscles.

Above all, I liked his ash-gray hair and eyes, reminiscent of a snowy winter sky.

I looked Derek over and then reached for the bowl of grapes, swallowing a few more.

“Ah.”

It was then.

When I bit into a plump grape, the juice spilled and stained my lips. Derek raised his head, wondering what had happened when I exclaimed, and as soon as our eyes met, with him trying to conceal his desire, I felt mischievous.

“!”

I, who had been wiggling my feet, darted out my red tongue and licked the grape juice. It must have been quite stimulating to watch me lick my own lips, as the veins in Derek’s neck bulged as he watched.

I giggled and pressed the tips of my toes against his firm thigh as he knelt.

“Sir Knight, would you bring me that diary over there?”

“…Yes, Your Majesty.”

A metallic sound came from the sturdy knight’s throat.

Teasing him was quite enjoyable. Every time I played a prank, his yang energy grew stronger, which was good for me to greedily devour and turn into lifespan.

But I shouldn’t push him too hard, as it would be pitiful.

I took the diary that Derek respectfully handed to me and opened it to the page where I had left off yesterday.

This diary, with its red lambskin cover and pages of high-quality paper, was a record of the events that occurred when ‘Leonarda Achilo’ became ‘Leonarda Nix’.

I had found it a few days ago while changing the bedroom to my liking, and thinking it might be helpful, I had been reading it.

Why haven’t I finished reading such an important thing yet, you ask?

‘It’s frustrating. Extremely!’

I have no right to speak, given my own failed love, but honestly, seeing someone else’s failed love story was infuriating.

I had to take deep breaths several times while reading the stories Leonarda had scribbled. I couldn’t contain my anger.

[ I hate him so much for not looking at me. I wish he would die. Or at least disappear from my sight… Or I… Ah, I can’t take this anymore……. ]

The ‘Or I’ part was haphazardly covered with black ink, but I could roughly make out the hidden content by discerning the ends of the alphabet strokes. And at the end of the last sentence were a couple of tear drops.

After skimming through the page I had been reading yesterday with blurry eyes, I thumped my chest once and turned to the next page. Meanwhile, Charlotte, the maid who had entered, dried my feet with a fluffy towel.

[ I’m so lonely that I want to keep a pet. A dog would be nice, or a cat. But why do I sneeze so much when I’m near animal fur? Am I not even able to keep an animal? I don’t know where to fill my loneliness then. Why was I born like this? ]

‘It seems Leonarda had a fur allergy.’

[ After a long time, I felt well enough to attend a banquet with the ministers. The servant serving the meal first portioned food onto his plate. Then he naturally moved towards that woman. When that woman said in an embarrassed tone that she was sorry, the servant seemed to realize his mistake. What am I… in this palace? ]

It was only natural that a legal wife should take precedence over a concubine.

No matter how cherished a mistress might be, she couldn’t be treated better than the legal wife in a place where they were together, according to propriety.

‘Honestly, I don’t understand why a mistress would even be sitting at a banquet with the ministers.’

Given how minimal the Empress’s influence is in the current palace, let’s set that aside.

‘Did they let this servant live?’

If it were me, I would have plucked out those useless eyeballs.

Seeing that there’s no mention of it, it seems the impudent head was left intact on the body. That’s no way to maintain discipline.

The real Leonarda must have had a much kinder personality than I thought.

“Tsk.”

I irritably tore off some grapes and put two in my mouth at once.

As I chewed the grapes with bulging cheeks while reading various stories that choked me up, I felt the urge to throw this diary away or burn it immediately.

“Phew.”

After forcibly holding back and turning the next page with trembling hands for a few minutes.

‘Anyway, so the mistress is doing all the duties of the Empress, using the excuse that the Empress’s body is weak.’

So they can’t even call the mistress a mistress! They have to call her ‘Holy Maiden’?

‘This is ridiculous. What does it matter if she’s a Holy Maiden? Who cares? She’s a childhood friend, so what?’

The Emperor clearly purposely put Leonarda in the position of Empress.

If a healthy person became Empress, he wouldn’t be able to give power to the woman he loves!

‘Wait, then is he just waiting for her to die as soon as possible even now?’

He’s completely insane.

After reading the diary to the end, I felt utterly disgusted as Enrique came to mind.

“It’s your fault. To think you’d make me kill you…”

Even with my eyes closed, the scene of Enrique blaming me vividly comes to mind.

Enrique, who wasn’t under mind control, nor under anyone’s spell. He who decided to kill me with a clear mind.

What was his love, really?

Would it be better if Enrique’s feelings weren’t love? Perhaps it would be less miserable if he had never loved me for even a moment.

But he did love me to some extent.

‘Just enough to love me less than himself, that’s how much he loved me.’

I too, born and raised as a demon, never learned what love was, but I knew what loyalty, devotion, and aesthetics were. And even though I knew he was a holy knight, I wouldn’t have killed Enrique.

That much was certain.

‘Did Enrique think I would kill him if his identity was revealed?’

Is that why he attacked without hesitation?

I had no intention of attacking.

‘He clearly said that. He asked why I had come down. He resented me. He resented having to kill me with his own hands…’

In other words, Enrique had planned to have someone else kill me.

Our newlywed home must have been a trap.

But things went wrong because I escaped from there.

‘Ah, no matter how many times I think about it, it’s just awful.’

I suddenly recalled the unfamiliar woman with pink hair. He, who had been reluctant to have skinship with me, remained still when that woman ran and embraced him.

“Ah, my poor Enri! My love. You must have been through so much?”

There was much that could be inferred from that one sentence.

A relationship close enough to call Enrique ‘Enri’. Probably the woman Enrique truly loved.

Given that he was a prince, that woman’s status must be noble.

Everything that woman wore and adorned, as seen by my dying eyes, was of high value, so my guess is reasonable.

‘Moreover, it was probably that woman’s plan to send Enrique to that region to meet me in the first place.’

She must be quite ambitious too. To endure for a whole year to make Enrique the Crown Prince.

I applaud that patience, at least.

‘If it were me, I could never have watched my man spend an entire year with another woman.’