Suddenly, her heart began to flutter.
‘Why am I feeling this way?’
Ren leaving her house was supposed to be good news.
She should have felt relieved that she no longer had to protect him.
‘Grandmother is trying to ease my burden and alleviate my anxiety.’
How could she not understand Bireta’s intention to take on this troublesome task?
Sharti rubbed her chest area under the blanket.
Despite her mind feeling grateful and relieved, her mood still felt strange.
‘There’s no need to worry since he’s leaving with Grandmother Bireta.’
Except for one time, Bireta had always been perfect, and as a current mercenary, she left no loose ends.
Since Ren had seen Sharti and her grandchildren’s faces, Bireta would surely educate him well to prevent any future misconceptions.
“So I hope you’ll think positively about it.”
“……”
Unlike Sharti, who felt conflicted with her unsettled heart, Ren seemed to be in a good mood, feeling unburdened.
Perhaps because of this, Sharti’s mood continued to sink.
She felt frustrated with herself for being the only one to receive this news so glumly when she would have welcomed it just a few days ago.
“I mean about talking with me. Even if it’s just for one day. Don’t feel burdened, just think of it as practice like just now.”
“……”
Sharti looked at Ren with a bewildered expression.
He seemed more interested in Sharti speaking than in Bireta’s proposal.
‘Is he not concerned because he’s already made up his mind about Grandmother’s suggestion?’
Maybe he was talking about practice for Sharti’s sake, who would be left alone.
‘……Well, at least he’s thinking of me.’
Sharti suppressed her feelings that were starting to spiral out of control.
She lacked composure, having received sudden news while still feeling heavy-headed from the lingering fever.
Sharti lifted the corners of her drooping mouth.
Though it wouldn’t be visible under her hood, she wanted to congratulate him with good intentions.
“……Clothes?”
Ren furrowed his brow.
Ren bent his waist slightly and stared intently at Sharti’s palm with an intense gaze.
Tilting his head this way and that, Ren shifted his gaze to look at Sharti.
“I’m wondering if I read that correctly just now.”
Ren let out a sigh, his chest rising and falling dramatically.
He placed both hands on the bed and lowered his head deeply.
“……So you’re sending me off.”
“……?”
Sharti couldn’t hear the words he muttered to himself.
Ren raised his head crookedly.
“I couldn’t tell you earlier, but I got scolded quite a bit.”
“……?”
“That old woman hit me here, saying I should learn how to converse properly first.”
Ren brushed up his bangs, speaking with emotions removed and exaggeration added.
His forehead, which had been slightly reddish until now from being hit by Bireta, was revealed.
Sharti opened her mouth in surprise.
‘Are you okay?!’
She had heard complaints more than once or twice about how being hit by Bireta made one’s bones ache even if the outside seemed fine.
As Sharti reached out her hand, Ren promptly presented his forehead.
After confirming Sharti’s reaction, Ren cleared his throat and began to vent his grievances.
“I just spoke to her the way I speak to you.”
“……”
“Then I got scolded and hit by that old woman several times.”
Sharti closed her mouth, at a loss for words.
Bireta disliked ill-mannered people and wouldn’t associate with those lacking courtesy.
And in Bireta’s eyes, Ren would have fallen into both categories.
‘I shouldn’t have left his informal speech unchecked.’
Perhaps leaving him to use casual speech due to his memory loss was the root of the problem.
She hadn’t expected his attitude to be the same towards adults.
Sharti reflected on her mistake with slightly clouded eyes.
One had to use honorifics and respond properly at all times.
This was true not just for Bireta, but for meeting anyone else as well.
‘Since Ren looks intimidating, he needs to change his first impression through conversation.’
While Ren’s first impression was of an intimidating person using short and rigid speech, his actions actually showed kindness and consideration.
He was someone who knew how to express gratitude and apologize, and who tried to worry about others and be helpful.
Surely Ren could gain favor if he just changed his attitude a little.
“It seems I need to practice to improve.”
Ren showed enthusiasm, seemingly aware of his problem.
“So I think it would be good if we became practice partners for each other.”
“……?”
No matter what the topic was, it always ended the same way.
By now, she should have noticed his ulterior motives, but Ren didn’t give her a chance.
“Those soldiers might come back too. I’m not sure how long I’ll have to pretend to be a runaway slave with a broken head.”
As Sharti nodded, seeming persuaded, Ren smiled and then hid it.
“So we’ll need practice to appear as perfect runaway slaves. Especially when dealing with the master.”
“……”
“Don’t you think so? Master?”
Sharti just blinked blankly.
Needless to say, Sharti had been far removed from the title of ‘master’ throughout her life.
It wasn’t a title she would use or hear.
Perhaps because of this, Sharti’s cheeks quickly reddened in embarrassment.
“If we don’t practice perfectly, that old woman might hit me again.”
Sharti hesitated at the brazen counterattack.
With Bireta, that possibility was highly likely.
As Sharti pondered seriously, Ren sat down on the floor by the bed and matched her eye level.
“Even if it’s not pretending, not using informal speech was our first promise, after all.”
Sharti let out a small laugh.
Wasn’t it a promise he only remembered when it was convenient?
But soon her mind became calm.
‘He wants to… have a conversation…..’
For her, conversation meant writing.
Her voice was a weapon, and using her voice in front of others was only to frighten them.
Even then, since settling in the village, she had only mumbled briefly under the blankets on thundery days.
‘He wants me to… let him hear my voice.’
Sharti clutched the blanket.
It was a simple thing. One might wonder why she was agonizing so much over something that just required putting strength in her throat and making a sound.
But it was shameful.
Showing the terrible flaw she had gained after losing her normalcy, receiving reactions of not just mockery but discomfort and contempt mixed with disgust, had been etched into her as a wound.
“Sha-.”
A large, rough palm covered her pale hand that was gripping the blanket.
When Sharti reflexively pushed it away, this time he held out his palm.
Ren’s thick index finger wrote large letters on his big, rough palm.
“……”
“Oh, was I too fast?”
Ren, clumsy at hand-writing communication, patiently rubbed his palm and rewrote repeatedly.
Sharti felt the tightness in her chest that had been building up until now loosen.
Because of this, her mouth opened unconsciously.
“Why are you going this far?”
“……”
“Do you pity me?”
Ren’s lips quivered at the words spoken weakly.
But Ren used his hand instead of his mouth.
“There’s no way a conversation is possible with a voice like this.”
Sharti bit her lip hard.
Contrary to her feelings, words came out without going through her mind.
“You met the soldiers. You heard Grandmother, Birena, and Tein’s voices. Now you know how different their voices are from mine.”
“……!”
Sharti had many grounds for rebuttal.
Because everyone did. Even Bireta’s family couldn’t hide the pity that seeped into their faces when they heard her voice.
Sympathy or discomfort and contempt.
She had become accustomed to it, and that familiarity became natural and expected.
Her ears weren’t damaged and her hearing was normal, so she had simply accepted the obvious without exaggeration.
But Sharti’s breath caught as she saw Ren, angry at her.
Ren swallowed a groan and scratched his head vigorously.
This was the limit of his ability to calmly continue hand-writing communication.
“Originally, I suggested practice or whatever because I like your voice, Sha. Pitiful? You’re a doctor, you can save people, you can sew and cook, and you even have this house. If anything, considering everything, I’m the most pitiful one with just a big body and a dumb head that can’t even distinguish between herbs and weeds, and gets hit on the forehead by an old woman.”
Ren stated boldly.
He was so confident that even Sharti was about to agree without thinking.
When Sharti didn’t deny it, Ren felt a moment of self-loathing, but he continued resolutely.
“It’s practice. Just practice. We have nothing else to do for three days, so let’s practice for just one day first.”
[This is the timeline separator]Ren, who had briefly gone to the kitchen due to Sharti’s stomach growling, sat in a chair for a moment and held his head.
‘What exactly am I trying to do?’
What had clearly been an act to persuade Sharti had somehow become sincere, and he found himself trying to convince her with all sorts of excuses.
While emphasizing practice to Sharti, Ren couldn’t understand why he himself was going this far.
‘What is it about Sha that’s got me caught up?’
Rather, his inexplicable doubts only deepened.
Could he really be sure that this behavior wasn’t born out of sympathy?
Was this not a desperate attempt to leave something in her memory when he leaves her side in three days?
“Am I really broken?”
Ren rubbed his solar plexus with one hand.
He needed to accurately figure out the cause of his uncontrollable thoughts and actions whenever he saw Sharti.
Only then could he make a clear decision on Bireta’s proposal.
“Let’s start with the meal first.”
Ren clicked his tongue after checking the remaining meat stew.
The unheated stew was beyond lukewarm, with meat grease floating on top.
Just in case, Ren took a spoonful of the solid parts, but immediately covered his mouth.
‘It’s cold.’
This wasn’t a temperature suitable for the sick Sharti to eat.
Ren, unable to spit out the food Sharti had prepared, swallowed it with water and looked around quickly.
That’s when he realized the oddity he had felt every time he saw the kitchen.
“……There’s no hearth.”
If that was the case, he just needed to find something to substitute for a hearth.
As Ren was looking around, Sharti was coming out of the bedroom.
When Sharti stumbled, Ren rushed to her side to support her.
“Don’t come out, just wait. I’ll prepare it quickly and bring it to you.”
Despite Ren’s dissuasion, Sharti stubbornly headed to the kitchen and rummaged through her pocket.
What Sharti took out was a red magic stone.
“What are you going to do with that stone?”
Instead of explaining, Sharti struck the magic stone on the table a couple of times.
Ren watched with surprised eyes as the pattern on the stone became clear and smoke began to rise.
When Sharti placed the stew pot on top of the magic stone, it didn’t take long for the stew to start boiling.
“What is this? A hearth?”
Sharti didn’t stop her hand-writing communication.
Thinking that Sharti’s wall was indeed consistent, Ren swallowed his disappointment.
“Why use a magic stone instead of a hearth?”
“……”
Sharti was just then scooping the appropriately boiled stew into bowls.
After placing his portion of stew in its place, Sharti showed him her hand-writing.
“I see.”
Chopping firewood and tending to a fire was certainly not easy for a woman alone.
In comparison, the magic stone did indeed seem convenient.
Ren sat in a chair and watched Sharti start her meal before picking up his spoon.
Even so, his gaze kept darting to the magic stone.
‘It must be expensive.’
Since magic stones were valuable, she must have kept it separately.
Ren became lost in thought as he cleaned his bowl thoroughly.
Then he thought of what he could do.
With a more relaxed mind, Ren stood up from his seat.
“If you’re done eating, go back inside. I’ll wash the dishes.”
Ren turned his back, holding the bowls.
“……”
Sharti, who had also taken her cold medicine, got up hesitantly.
Before Ren started washing the dishes, she mumbled to his back.
“Thank you.”
“……!”
Ren quickly turned around, but Sharti was already entering the bedroom.
Indeed, the power of warm stew was great.
Seeing Sharti with her guard lowered after filling her stomach, Ren was about to further ignite his resolve when-
“We’ll talk tomorrow. I’m going to bed early today.”
Clunk. Ren froze, holding the dishes, and stared blankly at the bedroom door.
The makeshift bedroom door that had been clumsily put together was rattling.
Imagining Sharti standing behind the door, Ren rubbed the area near his solar plexus.
‘Is this broken too?’
______
In This Life, I Won’t Be Foolish To Lose You Again (Female-dominant)
When Shen Yuan encountered Su Jin again in his previous life, she had already become the Prime Minister of the current dynasty. As for him, the former top young master of the capital, he had long since fallen into the abyss, becoming a singer on a pleasure boat.
After a song ended, he was redeemed and sent to the Su Residence.
Su Jin respected and cherished him, gave him a roof over his head, and bestowed him with warmth. Shen Yuan fell deeper and deeper, but before he could express his feelings, Su Jin passed away.
Shen Yuan died to follow her in death, but instead, he returned to when he was fifteen years old.
At that time, he was not yet engaged, and Su Jin was just a poor scholar.
Shen Yuan gritted his teeth, casting aside all his pride, and thought of ways to coax and entice her every day.
The colder and more indifferent Su Jin was towards him, the more proactive Shen Yuan became.
He was not afraid of being mocked by the world, only wanting to marry his Wife-master early, to hold her hand and never let go for a lifetime.
[Note: This story will not specifically point out the male lead’s reincarnation time point; it’s all in the details. Whenever you feel that the male lead is acting strangely, he has most likely been reincarnated.]
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