‘His hair seems longer than when we first met.’

Sharuti was captivated by the slightly swaying dark brown curls. Then, she felt a sudden urge.

She wanted to touch his hair.

Surely, if she did, their eyes would meet.

‘…I must be tired! Why am I thinking such things!’

Sharuti snapped out of her imagination, shaking her head internally.

‘Be careful not to fall asleep like last time. Stay awake!’

Sharuti opened her eyes wide, straightened her back, and shook off drowsiness.

“…Is anything uncomfortable?”

“Ah, no!”

“That’s good.”

Ren chuckled and released Sharuti’s hands.

In a blink of an eye, Ren caught Sharuti’s feet.

“R-Ren! I’m good now!”

“I am not satisfied yet.”

Ren, in a familiar posture, wrapped Sharuti’s feet and legs with a towel and continued massaging.

It was still a skillful massage, causing Sharuti to make involuntary sounds of pleasure.
Sharuti, who had been tossing and turning while trying to withdraw her foot, gave up and tightly closed her eyes. In the meantime, she felt that Ren’s massage skills had improved.

‘Does he study massage separately?’

Certainly, thanks to Ren’s massage, many symptoms, such as leg soreness and stiffness after a long walk, had significantly diminished.

The hands were no exception. Sharuti repeatedly clenched and stretched her hands.

The changes in her body after Ren’s massage had become familiar as well.

Many things had changed due to Ren’s presence, and gradually, Sharuti had become accustomed to those changes.

“How was your day?”

“What are you talking about?”

Even as Ren asked back, he remained focused on the massage.

“You went out.”

“…….”

Ren lifted his head.

“You probably needed to wrap the bandages, but even though it was a short time, you freely went outside. You must have visited several villages, saw people, met them, and had conversations.”

“…….”

“I was curious about how it went.”

Ren suffered from amnesia and was someone who would eventually leave.

Instead of the fake name ‘Ren,’ he would recover his real name and return to his original life.

Despite getting used to it, influenced a lot and gradually changing, in the end, she would be alone again.

Sharuti reaffirmed reality and gathered her resolve to loosen up.

“Did you remember anything?”

“I don’t know.”

While Ren was nonchalantly responding, he remained focused on the massage.

This time, Sharuti avoided Ren’s touch.

“Ren? Take a look at me.”

Ren’s voice sounded quite sarcastic, making Sharuti worryingly stare at him with a concerned expression.

Unexpectedly, Ren’s expression, as he reluctantly raised his head, was not good.

“What happened? Did someone behave rudely? Or did something really trigger a memory or…”

“Sha.”

“Yeah.”

Ren couldn’t easily open his mouth. Due to Sharuti’s restlessness, her lips felt dry.

Due to that, Sharuti was unaware that Ren was slightly pressing his body against hers.

“It was peaceful. The village, the people, everything.”

Ren looked down with a bitter tone.

“A sense of belonging, camaraderie. I saw and confirmed those feelings for the first time today, feelings I have never had or experienced.”

“…….”

“And at the same time, I realized. The fact that I am an existence that cannot belong to those feelings.”

His self-deprecating monologue was pitiful.

Unconsciously, Sharuti reached out her hand. However, her hand, extended awkwardly, stopped in mid-air.

‘What should I say to comfort him?’

After much contemplation, Sharuti gathered the courage and patted the back of Ren’s hand.

“Since you have no memories, things will change when you find them.”

With her small hand, Sharuti resolutely comforted Ren’s large, unhidden hand.

Ren raised his head.
“What if? Even if I find my memories, what if I’m still empty inside?”

Sharuti was somewhat surprised inwardly.

It was an extremely negative and skeptical reaction.

“Even if I find my memories, what if I become more pathetic than now? What if the memories I was looking for are actually my flaws?”

Profound loneliness. Vague fear. Distinct resignation.

As the distance between them closed, Ren’s emotions were vividly revealed.

“Do you know what I was thinking while wandering alone today?”

Ren expressed self-reproach.

“Meeting people, going to new places, I thought it was fortunate that not a single memory came to mind.”

“……!”

“I like my current self. It’s not that my subconscious is rejecting it; it’s my current will. I don’t want to actively search for what I’ve lost.”

It was a statement that cut off and discarded the past that had already passed.

The cold appearance that might come back to haunt her later caused a sharp pain in Sharuti.

At that moment, Ren turned his head towards Sharuti.

He was smiling. It was a slightly poignant smile, as if to say it’s okay.

“The little doctor said that. I am, ‘Ren,’ a ‘good person.’ But… when I find my memories, all the emotions I felt and realized while being with you, Sha, might fade away.”

Ren, who no longer looked like a good person in the eyes of an innocent child, expressed his fear.

He was worried that once he found his memories, his present and past would intertwine and become murky.

Ren’s gaze deeply penetrated Sharuti’s eyes, as if delving into her innermost thoughts.

‘It’s just a speculation.’

However, Sharuti found herself unable to offer any rebuttal.

There was no certainty about the variable called memory.

Due to her lack of eloquence, she couldn’t even come up with words to comfort Ren.

‘In any case, it’s Ren’s memory. It’s not something others should interfere with in the decisions of the patient.’

Then what was the pain from earlier?

Sharuti couldn’t understand why she herself felt hurt by Ren’s harsh words, saying that she didn’t need a past with lost memories.

‘…He promised, though.’

Even recalling Ren’s promise didn’t completely dispel the turmoil in her heart.

While observing the quietly distressed Sharuti, Ren subtly flipped his hand and held her palm.

“And there’s something else I feel.”

“……?”

Ren lightly shook Sharuti’s hand.

“I’m happy that there’s a place for me to return to.”

“…….”

“I’m glad that you’re there at the place I’m returning to, Sha.”

At that moment, Sharuti’s gaze turned towards the hands held together.

The trembling transmitted through the large palm on the other side tickled her.

Sharuti slowly lifted her gaze and looked at Ren.

“So, I’m okay. You don’t have to worry.”

“…….”
As the relationship grew closer, Sharuti learned a lot about Ren, and she could also discern his emotions. As much as Sharuti changed, as much as she influenced the change in herself, Ren was also influenced by Sharuti, but the difference in their transformations was undeniable.

Sharuti was quick-witted.

She deliberately didn’t withdraw her hand and felt the tremor coming from him for quite a while.

It was a night when thoughts multiplied.

Three days later, the main gate of Ashu’s village swung wide open.

Dozens of mercenaries, emitting a rough impression and fierce momentum, visited the hidden village.

The village chief’s mouth gradually widened as the tremendous crowd approached.

“S-so many… Please come in.”

The village chief, whose face showed signs of tension, welcomed Bireta and the mercenaries with courtesy.

Leading the mercenaries at the forefront was someone Sharuti knew well.

“Our kid is here.”

It was Bireta.

She had rushed here, believing in just one note from Sharuti.