Griselda took a step back, her face gradually stiffening. Even her eyelids slowly widened. In her direct line of sight was the door gap, open about two finger joints wide. And through that dark gap, tap tap. Four bronze claws quietly slipped in and grasped the door. Yes, they were beast claws. The torch shadow illuminating the doorway suddenly distorted at the presence inside.

“…Time?”

Johannes asked with difficulty. That voice, as if stabbing down pain, came from far above Griselda’s crown, which often heard it described as pole-like. The boy’s voice, still youthful and familiar to her ears, from such a high place. Griselda, turned pale blue, slowly, slowly raised her face. Pushing her chin up, high.

Eyes met where they shouldn’t have.

“Can it be solved… by mere time?”

“……”

“More than anything… more than anyone… she needs my apology.”

The open gap was narrow. The devil only showed one eye through that narrow gap. That was rather tragic for Griselda. A black devil imitating a child’s voice. If there hadn’t been the door as a shield between them, and if she had rather witnessed the devil’s full form. Perhaps she could have reflexively fled even before being frightened.

Griselda had been tightly closing her mouth for some time now. While her whole body was trembling, her legs were stiff and she couldn’t even flee. In the end, without being able to give a single answer, she just had the image of the devil’s long black eyelashes trembling finely imprinted in her eyes. The monster behind the door seemed to slightly lower its head. Griselda heard something rough and hard scratching against the door. Was that the sound of the devil’s horns she had seen long ago?

“Inette will never feel at ease.”

“……”

“Unless I beg for forgiveness with tears before her… and prove that I can no longer harm her, she will surely remain frustrated like her mother and be wary of me for the rest of her life. She would fear me.”

“……”

“I’m certain. She’s the only one who can tame and discipline me. So for her wellbeing, I need… her… Yet at such a time, I can’t even get close.”

The devil’s already half-sunken eyelids closed tightly then. The pupil that had been like a crack among shattered silver fragments disappeared like that.

“I don’t know the way.”

The last was a soliloquy like a crying child. Crack. The ominous claws dug into the doorframe. Now even the devil’s hand, with bulging veins, was trembling. And then, at that moment, fire lit in Griselda’s eyes.

“Get a hold of yourself.”

Griselda’s voice echoed through the empty corridor. The devil, seemingly a bit startled, opened its eyes hazily and looked down at her.

Griselda was also startled by herself. It was an exclamation she had let out without realizing. Its foundation was not courage. In fact, it was anger that she thought had long since decayed and been erased. Just then, the devil was leaning its temple against the door gap with a slightly staggering gesture. Griselda’s eyebrows contorted as if in pain. Does this thing, who has seized the position of heir to this fortress, even know what it looks like right now? Perhaps gaining strength from the devil’s appearance, which had seemed out of its mind for a while now. The anger that had been suppressed for a moment finally began to boil up. After holding back again and again, Griselda finally burst out like a machine gun.

“How dare you think of acting spoiled to a sister who already has nowhere to place her heart…. You, since when have you become so pathetic? What? The young lady’s wellbeing? No. Right now, you just want to be forgiven. You want to unload all your guilt, your worries, your thirst onto the young lady. To make it all as if nothing happened…!”

“……”

“Who… By whose permission…”

Griselda, who had been hissing, suddenly closed her mouth. How many times had she shaken her head during the not-so-long scolding, her hair was disheveled under her headcover, with several strands escaping around her ears. Her throat and ear canals were all hot. She felt like her chest would burst with contempt for the overgrown boy before her eyes. Ah, you know what? Devil. Your mother didn’t live like that.

“He’s not my son, is it?”

The voice of the duchess, whose eyeballs were disgustingly glistening just before her final rest, flashed through her mind. That dry branch that painfully gripped Griselda’s wrist. On the sickbed of the woman who had driven her husband to his death to cover up her own sin, and even caused her to lose the child in her womb, the pungent smell of herbs wafted like the scent of death. What had she answered the duchess then? Though she hadn’t fully grasped the intention, she seemed to have just quietly sneered.

Ah…! The duchess, that woman.

She never apologized to Griselda even once. Until her last breath, she didn’t say a word about that tragedy of the past. Before Griselda, that woman was merely cold and sickly pale like porcelain, a noble lady as lofty as an expensive flower. She lived so indifferently.

Griselda hated her to her heart’s content. She despised her to her heart’s content. Even after regaining peace of mind by seizing a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and gaining a son named Winfrid, she had no hesitation in contempting that woman. Rather, she felt she had gained spiritual superiority.

A woman who didn’t even know how the outside situation was unfolding. A woman who couldn’t even handle her own husband gently, crumbling day and night to the gestures of a ruler more demonic than a devil. A foolish woman who placed things that weren’t even her sons as sons, and only then felt deeply at ease alone. A foolish noble lady. Thus, that woman no longer occupied even a speck of dust in Griselda’s tragic life. Griselda stepped closer to the door.

“Are you sorry?”

She gritted her teeth once.

“Are you afraid of being shunned for life?”

She raised her face, almost burying it under the devil’s chin. It looked down at her with a light full of wounds and confusion. Looking up from right below, she could clearly see even the opaque inner membrane of the devil’s eyelids. She grabbed the doorframe. The monster’s claws embedded right above touched Griselda’s fingers and eyes, but she was not afraid at all. Rather, the gaze that had always been like an orphan’s, now like a trapped wild animal cub, caused a strange anxiety and sympathy to well up. Somewhere, the smell of rain-soaked earth arose. On such a dry night.

“Then…”

Keeping her gaze fixed on the monster’s, Griselda swallowed once. She could certainly bestow the mercy of setting up a flag that a young child could use as a guide. She strained her voice. Mustering all her strength, she finely chopped her voice and delivered it very softly.

“You should… grow silently.”

Johannes’ eyes wavered in the shadows. He seemed to be asking with his eyes what she meant, not understanding. Griselda was just as unstable.

“Your anxiety and guilt are entirely your own, so take responsibility for them. Become a noble and upright knight with an excellent spirit to succeed the duke’s family. Become a pillar that the young lady can hate for life without any effort… That’s what I mean.”

“……”

“Our young lady will live through it that way.”

“……”

“Postpone your apology until after that.”

Griselda’s anxious gaze fell slightly. She stepped back a little, letting go of the door. Is this truly the right mercy? She didn’t know. But for Griselda herself, it was the best advice she could give. That’s what she thought. The devil had no reaction for a long time. Griselda only realized how heavy one of her shoulders was when she felt the flickering torch shadow above her head. She had been putting so much strength into the shoulder holding the lamp that she felt a slight muscle ache coming on. Just as she raised her head to leave altogether.

“…Alright.”

Johannes murmured lowly between his fangs.

The beast’s eyes hidden under long eyelashes were completely wet. A sticky membrane slowly enveloped the eyeball once before retreating back inside the eyelid. Its bronze cheeks and mouth, clearly showing signs of fatigue, were a quiet smile that Griselda could not understand. Click. Leaving Griselda standing dumbfounded, the door that had been just a long narrow gap closed.

Griselda stood alone in the silent corridor, her heart all scratched up.

***

That night, she had a long dream. Somewhere in the endless darkness, a baby’s cry kept faintly ringing. Griselda shoveled dirt to cover that cry. Chills kept coming, wrapping around her nape, and her rain-soaked hands kept slipping. No matter how much she covered, the crying wouldn’t stop. It was such a nightmare.

…Lord Winfrid!

Griselda woke up with a start, unable to even scream. After just trembling with her body drenched in cold sweat, she suddenly jumped out of bed and headed straight for Winfrid’s sickroom. She didn’t think for even a moment, so it was purely instinct ingrained in her bones.

Lest she wake the child, she quietly opened the door with her trembling hands under control and approached the bed. As soon as she laid eyes on the sleeping child’s back, sighs of relief poured out. The sensation of hot vigor returning to her entire body, which had been heavy and cold like a wet cotton ball until then, was strange even to herself. Griselda gently lifted the blanket and lay down with her chest against the child’s back. Perhaps she couldn’t completely suppress her presence, as Winfrid, who seemed deeply asleep, turned towards her.

“…Where did you go?”

“To my quarters.”

“Then why didn’t you just keep sleeping there… Why did you come back?”

“I had a nightmare.”

“Did a monster appear?”

Winfrid yawned long and then burrowed into her chest. Griselda slipped one arm under the child’s shoulder and embraced his small back entirely. She rubbed her nose tip against Winfrid’s crown. A scent that seemed like milk and sweat gently moistened her philtrum. Though this child in her arms was just clinging and acting spoiled. She was surprised and glad to the point her nose tingled that she continued to gain courage to live on from this tiny child.

“No.”

Griselda gently patted the back of the child who was already silent. She closed her eyes.