#120

Because I desperately missed that sweetly shattered expression and terrible grip when he, having reached his climax completely in my mouth, roughly pushed the back of my head forward.

“Don’t think of spitting. Ah, swallow it all, Yvette.”

How pitiful and sweet was that fierce command that momentarily sounded mixed with anger, unable to contain the excitement.

Gripping the fully erect shaft with both hands, sliding my tongue, swallowing deeply into my throat, pressing the tip of my tongue against the narrow groove at the head of the manhood, Johannes would stiffen his entire body and groan as if dying. My sun who grasped and pressed down on my head. You probably never knew.

In truth, I wanted to make you cry at least once.

In truth, I always wanted to pin you down. So beg me more. Ah, Johannes.

I looked at Johannes, somehow suppressing the trembling rising from deep inside along with tears. He was staring at me with an expression on the verge of losing his breath. I picked up his hand that had fallen beside my thigh and guided it to his lower body.

“Do it yourself…”

And I murmured as if letting it slip:

“Show me… how easily you become an aroused, vulgar man. Pretend your hand is mine… okay?”

Johannes opened his eyes wide as if shocked.

“What are you hesitating for? You must have done this habitually since long ago. Imagining me…. So do it by yourself now…. I know you can do it. You actually like it…. So let me see it well. Don’t hide or cover anything…”

I grasped the side of his pelvis. At that, his lower garments rustled and spread further to the sides. As his white, smooth lower abdomen and groin were fully exposed under the cool moonlight, Johannes exhaled with a sound that clearly showed his embarrassment even to one ear. Even the platinum-colored hair around his groin seemed to turn bright red then.

That reaction pleased me terribly.

I gently stroked the soft hair covering the base, taking care not to touch the manhood. The sensation must have been too delicate and insufficient. I could see his manhood twitching anxiously.

It was spewing pre-fluid that had instantly pooled inside its groove, drip, drip. Like tears of excitement. The opaque fluid left a sticky trail as it slowly flowed down along his contours.

Johannes turned his head away completely.

As if ashamed. And on the other hand, it was a gesture tinged with a kind of contempt. It seemed to be contempt directed not at me, but at his own body. A habitual self-loathing. As if he absolutely couldn’t bear to look at his lower body that couldn’t hide its inner thoughts even with my gaze right before him.

“Don’t look away…”

But he stiffened at my voice.

“You watch too. What a pleasing sight it is. And… do it, Johannes…. I want to see. Okay?”

I urged Johannes to look, soothing and mocking him as he couldn’t bring himself to face me. Barely, just barely, Johannes’s gaze towards me seemed to ask if I was serious, but I didn’t bother to answer.

I simply wished for him to succumb to pleasure. I wished for him to become a more shameful man because of me. For him to be ashamed of the self he had prided as having lived only honorably.

And yet, I wanted to see my helpless knight who would end up following my words.

Ah, Johannes. Johannes. When I feel that you belong to me, I can’t help but shudder….

The part of his nape that hadn’t turned black and his cheeks were all flushed a wretched red. The anxious gaze that seemed to repeatedly ask if this was really okay finally slipped under his eyelids. Had he steeled his resolve then?

His sharp nails came down trembling and grasped his center. But he couldn’t move, stiffening his whole body as if something dirty had touched him. A moment of silence.

“Ugh…”

He let out a short gasp, his shoulders shaking. His hand that had long hesitated finally slid down.

Trembling slightly, it rose again.

And so, hesitantly, he began to move up and down his own body.

That day, Johannes immersed himself in his act very slowly. The start was so slow it was frustrating to watch. But as speed picked up in the hesitant hand movements, they gradually became smoother, and I couldn’t take my eyes off that sight.

The sensation of my lower abdomen tightening made me wet my undergarments. Hah… hah. Even his breathing, which grew rougher as Johannes increased the pace of his hand movements, was an indescribably beautiful melody to these ears.

The pre-fluid that his manhood, excited by his own hand, occasionally spilled forth formed a soft foam between his grip and the slick skin before slowly dissipating.

The fluid that hadn’t yet turned to foam flowed and flowed, slowly wetting his platinum pubic hair. That dampened platinum color mixed with the chilly moonlight that occasionally struck… Ah, Johannes. How could you…

How could even such a lewd appearance be so beautiful?

Perhaps your body is beautiful even to your own eyes?

I was completely enthralled by his actions when I suddenly raised my eyes to look at Johannes’s face. But my heart sank first. Because unexpectedly, my eyes met directly with Johannes’s.

Only then did I realize.

That Johannes had not taken his eyes off me, who was absorbed in his hand movements, for even a moment.

Johannes, who had been panting while staring at me with clouded eyes, seemed to have completely abandoned his shame by then. Dark pupils like a black moon held in an icy lake. Even after our eyes met straight on, he continued to pant endlessly, focused on rubbing himself. There seemed to be no way to stop.

With such an expression that seemed utterly mindless, he gazed at me persistently while pleasuring himself. Like someone who had gone blind from the sight of my expression.

Have you always had this expression? Does it feel like you’ve brought the fantasy in your mind into reality today? How did I, who became aroused watching his body, appear in his eyes…?

When that thought occurred to me, my face flushed hot instead. It took quite a long time for those silver eyes, which had swallowed a more heated breath than before, to notice my embarrassment.

Those eyes that suddenly flinched showed a hint of embarrassment for a moment, then soon contorted painfully. Those eyes looked as anxious as a child’s. Those eyes seemed to be begging me anew. Ah… please.

Don’t… despise me.

Tell me it’s okay… Yvette.

Don’t reject… this me….

I felt like I would lose what little sanity I had left to his anxious gaze. The knife-like grip did not cease its wet movements even in that moment of pleading to me. The sticky friction sound of rising and falling along the slick shaft continued to come from below without pause. As if trying to torment me with just those motions.

Yes, Johannes was clearly caressing me in his mind. He was rubbing his own body while imagining the scene of him caressing me, and in the end he was flushing red hot like melted iron – I could tell just by looking at his eyes. Because his unfocused silver pupils clung to my body and urged me on.

I’m imagining you, Yvette. So…

“…Look at me.”

Was it an auditory hallucination? It was certainly not a voice that merely wished for me to look. He wanted me to reach climax while watching him. My heart plummeted to the floor at that voice. A shudder that started in my waist instantly ran up my back.

I squeezed out my voice as if responding to Johannes’s plea.

“Is… masturbating in front of me… that pleasurable for you?”

Johannes seemed at a loss for words and couldn’t answer. His wavering gaze looked just like a frightened child. He gazed at me with eyes that seemed to melt with anguish in an instant. Yet his unstoppable touch seemed both bestial in its inability to stop, and somehow innocent at a glance. Ah, I could no longer endure.

“Johannes. Johannes…”

I panted, grasping his thighs.

“Looking at you… I feel like I’ll die instead…. So lovely…”

“…Ugh.”

“Ah, really…. So… beautiful, Johannes…”

I blindly caressed his abdomen exposed like a white sculpture between Johannes’s outstretched arms. That beautiful abdomen, solid as steel unlike mine, and sensual because of its solidity. I pushed up the hem of Johannes’s top all the way to his chest as I leaned down.

“Ah, hnngh…”

Johannes let out an urgent moan as his erect manhood pressed against my lower abdomen. I had no capacity to pay attention to that sensual reaction. I simply kissed his damp skin, parting Johannes’s firm chest, gasping with extreme thirst. I took the protruding tip in my mouth.

“Leak… leak more, Johannes. Get wetter. I’ll watch you.”

It was an impatient voice even to my own ears.

Ignoring his moans dripping onto my crown, I went further down. Along the well-defined contours of muscle, to the base of that thing still excited in Johannes’s grip. Past Johannes’s moving hand, above it. To that sweet tip. I first extended my tongue, grazing it with my lips. I kissed the groove, wet with fluid that had pooled there from the start, with an audible sound.

“Ah.”

At last Johannes’s hips jerked shallowly upwards. I felt the vibration on my chin. Feeling like I would choke, I pulled my lips away and swallowed, tasting the sour flavor of bodily fluids lingering in my mouth. Even that was like unripe pomegranate juice, so sweet on my tongue.

Unable to resist the urge to taste it again, I hurriedly traced his sensitive tip with the inside of my lips as if sucking it in.

“…Vette. Ah. Yvette.”

Like Johannes’s deep exhaled moan, I licked up the fluid pooling inside the groove and quickly took it in my mouth again. Then I suddenly sat up straight.

The regret was too much, as it was difficult to confirm Johannes’s expression with my eyes while I was leaning down. My whole body trembled like an aspen tree. At that moment, I felt I would wither from burning thirst if I did not capture the shuddering Johannes with these eyes.

Johannes was staring at me, completely stiff and trembling. It was a pitiful sight of him just grasping his genitals motionlessly, as if he could no longer endure. The massive wings that had been crumpled against the wall suddenly shook with a shudder.

That sight was as sensual as a beast in heat. It was also blasphemous, like a priest kissing the foot of lust.

My Johannes.