Roel Ibelle…

“So she was the woman the Count and Countess cherished so much.”

He had heard before that she was too fragile and rarely left the house at the Count’s estate.

Just hearing that story, he could somehow predict what kind of personality the woman would have.

She must be extremely fragile and just boring. In a word, it meant she was a woman from whom one should not expect the joy of meeting.

However, it was also true that he was curious about the face praised by men and the reasons his father complimented her until his mouth wore out.

Originally, the reason their first meeting was arranged was simply because of that curiosity.

That’s how the two people had their first meeting arranged by their parents.

Casien Ersian treated Roel as kindly and gently as possible.

As if he would give her anything she wanted, as if he very much welcomed this engagement and was confident he would only look at her in the future.

The curved eyes whenever they looked at him, the mouth that only spoke kind words, the skillful consideration he had never received before all shook Roel’s heart.

It was as expected. A woman who grew up pretty and knew nothing was too easy.

There was nothing remarkable about the woman who was eyed by all men and praised by his father until his mouth wore out.

After Roel left like that, Casien immediately regretted coming to this place, swayed by the rumors around him.

An engagement with the utterly boring Roel Ibelle. He already felt sick of it.

Of course, that didn’t mean he disliked the woman. If he had to evaluate, it was closer to liking her.

The problem was that his heart withered just from meeting her once.

Still, Casien endured and met her. He smiled kindly every time they met and did his best to fulfill his duties as a fiancé.

Even when he acted like that, seeing the men’s eyes constantly following her, she certainly seemed to be a woman good to have by his side, as his father said.

Thinking like that, he tried to endure somehow, but…

What could he do? His heart was not moved.

Casien thought he was putting in considerable effort just by not bringing up the breakup first to Roel.

Perhaps because of that mindset, the lukewarm meetings gradually became less frequent.

As expected, Casien soon began to turn his eyes elsewhere to find new stimulation in his boring life.

Then one day, he accidentally went to meet Roel Ibelle with traces of another woman on him. Although he wasn’t particularly in a deep relationship with the new woman, the woman he briefly met deliberately left traces on his clothes.

He thought “oops” for a moment but soon felt it was rather fortunate.

If the woman cried and made a fuss about this incident, it would be better to dump her. Well, he would be even more grateful if she brought up the breakup first.

But the woman who saw the red marks did not even blink an eye. She neither cried nor particularly interrogated him.

For the first time, curiosity arose in Casien at the sight of Roel Ibelle treating him the same as usual.

* * *

He thought she was just an innocent lady who knew nothing, but Roel Ibelle was a more amusing woman than he thought.

She had known from the beginning that he had no heart for her and even knew that he occasionally spent time with other women behind her back.

Casien was a terrible man who rationalized that it wasn’t a complete affair since he gave neither his body nor heart. But at the same time, he was also a man who knew how to discern that having eyes for other women while having a fiancée was not a very desirable thing to do.

So when the woman got angry, he thought he would have to endure it to some extent. But Roel Ibelle remained composed in any situation.

Such a reaction was also interesting, but what made him continue his bad habits was the woman’s eyes.

No matter what he did, the fact that her eyes directed at him were always full of sincere affection… strangely brought him satisfaction.

What made this woman so blindly devoted?

Considering the prestige exuded by the Ibelle Count’s family, it was unlikely that she fell for him after seeing his background. It also didn’t seem like she fell for his looks.

Did she become so infatuated just because he treated her a little well?

“Isn’t that too naive? Or just stupid.”

In fact, since the type of sincerity did not determine the degree of satisfaction, Casien thought it was fine either way.

Then, by chance, he witnessed the woman crying.

Roel Ibelle shed tears miserably as if she had lost a part of her world.

He already knew that her composure was all an act, but he didn’t know she was having such a hard time.

“I thought I hated crying women…”

For some reason, he couldn’t take his eyes off Roel crying.

Whenever a large teardrop flowed down her white cheeks, his heart felt electrified, and he couldn’t tell exactly what emotion he was feeling.

Guilt? If so, even after seeing the woman cry, his feet did not budge. Rather, he leaned comfortably against the wall and slowly took in the sight of the woman’s unhappy appearance.

Even during that time, Roel continued to shed tears miserably.

The emotion he felt whenever tears fell… seemed like intense euphoria. Perhaps the satisfaction of fully possessing the woman. And the excitement rising from deep within his heart, along with a slight sense of betrayal.

It was the most stimulating pleasure he had ever experienced in his life.

From the moment he realized that fact, Casien no longer deliberately hid the fact that he was seeing other women. And he eventually made Roel break down in front of him.

After sufficiently enjoying that sight, when Roel seemed too overwhelmed, he would whisper sweet love to her.

Then the woman would love him again like before.

Indeed, Roel Ibelle was the most beautiful woman when she clung to him, shedding tears and yearning for affection.

It was impossible to escape from the satisfaction he had once become addicted to.

However, Casien, who was accustomed to being easily loved, was overlooking an important fact.

The fact that what he was doing was not love, but merely the pursuit of pleasure. The fact that even great affection would eventually fade if trampled hundreds of times.

If he had known what determination Roel had when she opened her heart to him, what she was willing to give up to stay by his side, would he have stopped playing with her heart, holding it but not quite catching it?

Would he have taken those as greater pleasure, or would his trash-like thought process have returned to normal even slightly?

Those have now become facts that will never be known.

The most important fact was that Roel Ibelle had left Casien Ersian forever.

* * *

“It was only briefly like that at first… After that, I really loved you… I sincerely loved you, Roel.”

“…And that was love?”

“I loved… you, I loved you so much… So-”

“Are you trying to say that you loved me so much that you went around meeting other women?”

Roel burst into laughter filled with absurdity, to the point of being dumbfounded.

“How can you call that love? And with your own mouth at that.”

“I know you’re angry, Roel. I’m really sorry. You have every right to be angry. I… I did everything wrong. But I’ve reflected a lot…! It will never… never happen again, Roel…!”

Roel fiercely slapped away Casien’s outstretched hand.

“You grabbed me just to say this nonsense?”

“No… No, I wanted to clear up the misunderstanding… It seemed like you… you didn’t know that I loved you…”

The longer Casien’s words went on, the more distorted Roel’s expression became.

“I love you, Roel… So please come back, please…”

Roel, who had been taking deep breaths, gathered her last strength and pushed away Casien’s hand. She was about to leave the place when Casien’s words made her stop.

“If I don’t see other women…! I knew your mother would make us break up.”

“…”

Seeing Roel stop, Casien thought his excuse had moved her heart even a little.

“So I had no choice but to do that, really. Believe me, Roel.”

Casien, who quickly crawled on his knees, blocked Roel’s path again and grabbed the hem of her skirt.

“I couldn’t say it was like that from the beginning… But really, after that, I did it because I didn’t want to break up with you, believe me…”

“So you knew that fact too…?”

“Yes, your mother-”

Slap!

Roel slapped Casien’s cheek with all her might.

“…Trash.”

Although he was slapped hard enough to turn his head completely, Casien clung to Roel again as if it had never happened.

“Hit me as much as you want until your anger subsides. I did everything wrong. I was wrong, Roel… Just don’t leave… Please don’t go like this, okay?”

Rather, he brought Roel’s hand to his cheek as if she could ruin him as much as she wanted until her anger subsided. Casien’s voice began to be mixed with sobs.

“Roel… Roel. Are you listening to me?”

Even when she rubbed his cheek with her hand and desperately pleaded, Roel didn’t budge.

“Can’t you look at me…?”

“…”

“I love you, Roel.”

At the tearful confession, Roel lowered her head to look at Casien. It was the gaze he had wanted so much, but Casien’s sobs only grew louder.

“I really love you…”

Roel, who had been silently looking at Casien for a long time, spoke in a voice devoid of any emotion.

“You’re really a bad guy.”

“I know… I did everything wrong… wrong. I know it too, I know I did wrong… So… don’t go.”

“Casien.”

At the voice calling his name, Casien lifted his head as if enchanted. Roel had eyes that showed not a shred of emotion.

Soon, even more terrifying words penetrated his ears.

“I… I hate you so much. I truly despise you to the point of getting goosebumps.”

“Don’t go… Don’t go, no. Absolutely not.”

Realizing that this was truly the last time, Casien desperately clung to the hem of her skirt. But Roel spoke indifferently, not caring.

“Your love is so horrible, Casien.”