I don’t know how he noticed, even though I came in and packed my luggage very discreetly when Reus wasn’t around.

Perhaps he interpreted my attempt to return to our old ways as a way to deceive myself. Whatever the case, I had to give up on packing my luggage to leave.

‘It’s not like I need luggage to run away.’

This time, I was determined to leave somehow. Even if I had to flee with nothing in the end. Even if I had to bring up the past while looking Reus in the eye.

Come to think of it, the Emperor was quite clever. He must have revealed the truth knowing that once I learned everything, I would have no choice but to leave Reus in the end.

If I had been born without knowing anything about being the original story. And if by chance upon chance, I had reached the current situation, I might have made a slightly different choice.

But since that’s not the case. At least I shouldn’t do that.

I shouldn’t stay by Reus’ side, knowing that he becomes infinitely weaker when I’m around. Even if it means dying alone, I had to avoid blocking Reus’ path forward.

So I had to leave.

I didn’t bother packing my luggage and lived as usual. The peace that seemed to continue effortlessly was suddenly shattered by Reus one day.

“Why… aren’t you looking for your bag?”

I calmly replied to the voice tinged with faint resentment.

“I don’t need it anymore.”

Reus was confused by my answer, unsure if I had found another way and was acting like this.

“I think it’ll be fine without luggage.”

“…Roel.”

“Have you eaten dinner? If not, shall we go eat together? I was just about to head down to the dining hall anyway.”

I took Reus’ hand.

“Is this why you said we should go back to how we were before…?”

“No. It has nothing to do with that.”

“Don’t be kind to me. Rather… treat me like before. Get angry, ignore me, push me away.”

Despite saying that, Reus couldn’t bring himself to let go of my hand.

“You don’t have to stay with me, so please… If you’re going to be like this, please treat me like before.”

“What does that mean, Reus?”

“It’s better than you leaving.”

“Why?”

Reus couldn’t easily continue speaking. I looked at him for a moment and then smiled as usual.

“Reus. Let’s stop this and go downstairs. Everyone will be waiting for us to come down together.”

I pulled his hand, but Reus didn’t budge. Soon, a tear-choked voice was heard.

“What exactly do I… What should I do to make you not leave? Please tell me, Roel… I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ll do anything you say, so please just tell me…”

“…You haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Then why do you keep trying to leave?”

“And why do you keep trying to hold me back?”

“…”

“I-”

“Roel.”

I couldn’t finish my sentence because Reus hugged me.

“Don’t do this. Don’t do this… I was wrong. So please don’t say anything.”

So Reus also knew what the Emperor had told me. Knowing everything, he still tried to hold me back, saying he would make an effort.

The situation I had been dreading had finally come.

I just stood still without saying anything. I didn’t hug Reus back or comfort him like I used to.

Soon, my shoulder began to get wet.

Reus, unable to speak carelessly, hugged me tighter as he cried. But nothing changed. Even the man’s desperate sobs couldn’t change my decision.

“Your father caused that carriage accident, didn’t he?”

“…”

“Then why do you keep holding onto me? Now, stop-”

“I like you.”

What interrupted my words was Reus’ desperate confession.

“Roel, I like you…”

This time, I was at a loss for words. It wasn’t something that should have been said in this situation. But my rejection had forced Reus to confess.

“My father ruined your life. Then how…”

“I don’t care even if you completely ruin my life.”

“…Reus. Don’t do this.”

“I won’t ask you to like me back. Just stay by my side. You don’t have to force yourself to be kind to me. Just… please don’t leave my side, I beg you…”

“…”

“I’ll try to create reasons for you to stay at the Grand Duke’s mansion. I’ll prepare your favorite food every day… plant the flowers you like, and also… bring you the books you enjoy every day. I’ll create a space just for you where the sunlight is best…”

Reus painfully began to list the things he could do for me. But as he continued speaking, his voice became more choked with tears until eventually, his pronunciation became completely garbled.

In the end, unable to finish speaking, Reus collapsed onto my shoulder.

“Reus, I-”

I was about to say that I would only be a hindrance to him, but I stopped. If I said that, it was obvious he would deny it and try to hold me back again.

“…I don’t want to stay next to someone as dangerous as you.”

I could feel Reus’ hand gripping my arm tense up.

“I know everything. You’re planning a rebellion, aren’t you?”

Reus dropped his hand as if he had lost everything. He seemed to have never expected that I would know this fact.

“Roel… That’s… .”

“So how can I be happy here? Are you telling me to live here knowing the danger and enduring it? Ah, I see. What you want is not my happiness, but for me to be trapped here and live in fear for the rest of my life.”

“No. Roel… That’s absolutely not what I meant. How could I ever think of making you unhappy?”

“I don’t see much difference.”

“Roel…”

“If it’s punishment, I’ll accept it. If what you want from me is my unhappiness… I’ll stay by your side.”

I know it’s cruel. I knew that Reus didn’t mean it that way, and that he wouldn’t dare to think like that.

But unless I did this, it seemed Reus would never let me go. So even if it hurt him, I had to push him away somehow.

After all, this would be the last time I hurt him like this…

This much should make him give up. I tried to move away from Reus, who was standing still, unable to move. But before I could go far, I was caught by him again. Reus, hugging me from behind, asked me.

“Is it unhappy for you to be by my dangerous side?”

“…Yes. I no longer want to be by your side-”

“If that’s the reason, I’ll give up on the rebellion.”

“What… what do you mean?”

“Didn’t you say you don’t like it because it’s dangerous by my side?”

“Reus. Giving up on the rebellion… That’s impossible. That’s not what I meant.”

I tried to turn around to speak, feeling bewildered, but Reus didn’t loosen his arms around my waist.

“Roel. I’ll try to become someone you can like.”

“…Reus. This is-”

“I won’t do anything you dislike. I’ll fix everything you don’t like. I’ll change everything to be the way you want.”

“This isn’t right. Reus, that’s… not what I want. Don’t do such things because of me.”

“If that’s the case, you don’t need to worry. It’s because I want to do it now.”

“Reus…!”

“Yes, Roel.”

His tone was calm. As if there had been no problem until now, as if nothing would change in the future. Reus seemed to be saying such things to hold onto me, but the more he did this, the more convinced I became that I needed to leave.

“I’m going to leave regardless of your decision.”

“I have no intention of letting you go, Roel.”

The voice coming from behind me was filled with a fervor I had never felt before.

“Since you won’t listen to anything I say, I’ll do the same from now on.”

“Please don’t do this, Reus…”

I spoke pleadingly, but the arms around my waist only tightened their hold on me.

After that day, the relationship between Reus and Roel changed completely. The distance that had only been growing wider closed to the point where no gap could be seen.

However, this was a form of relationship caused by one-sided feelings, so it was far from the love Roel wanted. Therefore, Roel had no choice but to reject it.

The tender yet turbulent love that the man poured out. Although he packaged his feelings in the gentlest and softest way possible, this was obsession.

But Reus tried to monopolize even a single glance from Roel. He made efforts to direct the woman’s attention to him in any way possible, even if it meant making confessions that would receive no response.

“I like you.”

“…”

“I really like you, Roel.”

Even though it was he who had cornered Roel in the bedroom, making sure she wouldn’t encounter anyone no matter where she went, Reus craved attention as if that wasn’t enough.

At first, Roel tried to persuade Reus.

Saying that this was the life he had been working towards, begging him not to do this. That this wasn’t right. Pleading with him not to make such a choice just because of her.

“Reus, please… Please reconsider. You’ll surely regret this…”

Now it was Roel who was desperately begging.

However, Reus only gladly received the woman’s attention.

He liked it when only he was reflected in the woman’s eyes. When her soft, pitiful voice reached him, no matter what she said, he would respond in a gentle voice with his eyes curved into a smile.

Even when Roel turned her head away, Reus no longer cried.

Because even the time spent waiting for the woman to turn her head back to him was welcome.