Sorry, the Patricidal Tyrant Seems Beastly - Chapter 40

“You are harsh on yourself. When you show signs of sinking deeper into helplessness.”

Benjamin whispered softly.

“I am trampled by you like that, Charlotte.”

Benjamin’s words were ambiguous.

‘Why is he saying such things…’

Charlotte wiped the back of her neck. Cold sweat trickled down.

Benjamin left his seat.

After that, the imperial physician came by.

She drank two bowls of water infused with medicinal herbs. It was more bitter than drinking ground bitter leaves.

“I brewed good medicinal ingredients. Please drink it all as it is.”

Charlotte frowned at the bitter taste.

“I always wonder what this is made of…”

“It’s medicine to replenish your body’s energy.”

“I know it’s the medicine I used to take when I had a cold, but this is too strong.”

“Good things for the body are inherently bitter.”

Aaron took the medicine bowl and handed Charlotte a hard candy.

“Is there something on your mind?”

Aaron asked as Charlotte quietly sucked on the candy.

“Someone said I’m being harsh, but I don’t know what about me made that person anxious.”

“Your Majesty doesn’t seem to know. But somehow I think I do.”

Aaron grumbled as he gathered the medicine bowls.

“Please look back at those watching over you. Then, Your Majesty will know too.”

The bedroom was quiet. The warm fireplace was turned on.

She took a deep breath as she combed her long hair. Warmth seeped deep into her lungs.

‘It feels like I had a long dream.’

Charlotte pressed her temples firmly.

“I can’t remember anything.”

Charlotte stretched her arms out wide. The stiff neck muscles loosened up.

As she rubbed her nape and leaned back on the sofa, someone knocked on the door.

“Your Majesty, your grandfather from the House of Windsor has come to visit.”

Charlotte draped a shawl over herself and said to come in.

“Have you eaten?”

“Yes. What time is it? Are you alright?”

“Yes. There’s nothing to worry about.”

Leandro swallowed hard as he looked at the bedroom filled with the scent of herbs.

“You’re not hurt anywhere…”

“As Your Majesty has already said, I’m not hurt anywhere. I think I fainted after getting caught in some rain, but I’ve needlessly worried you, grandfather.”

“Ah, needless worry, what are you saying… Ah, what do you mean?”

Leandro wrapped his trembling hands around Charlotte.

“I was so surprised when I heard the news this morning. Fainting in the rain again, why did that happen? You fainted like that at the hunting grounds too, what if you faint like that again and worry us?”

“Grandfather.”

“No. You weren’t hurt, so it’s fine. That’s enough.”

After that, they exchanged various greetings.

Leandro heard bits and pieces of the story and stroked the back of Charlotte’s hand.

“If you take after your mother, you’d hate bugs, are you okay?”

“I was fine because Catarina handled it well.”

“I’m glad I sent her to your side. With someone by your side to protect you, we can be more at ease too.”

“How is Uncle Aster?”

“Your uncle has also gotten quite busy with the New Year’s festival matters.”

Afterwards, Charlotte saw Leandro off.

After that, she spent most of her time in the bedroom.

Charlotte tapped the table while looking at the chessboard. She moved the queen and tilted her head back.

‘What was it that I forgot?’

Something gradually scattered away.

[This is the timeline separator]

“Shall we bathe together?”

The reason for bringing this up was Benjamin’s complexion, which looked like he had stayed up for several nights.

“The imperial physician also said that soaking in warm water relaxes the muscles and relieves tension.”

“…You refused before, saying it goes against imperial etiquette.”

“Didn’t Your Majesty say that the old customs are outdated?”

Benjamin gave off the bitter scent characteristic of cigarettes.

‘He smokes cigars when he gets nervous.’

Even cigarettes were quite strong in their own way.

It was a fact she naturally came to know as the time spent by his side increased.

He unbuttoned his shirt.

There were no words.

His eyes met hers. He closed his eyes again and rubbed his neck.

A subtle malice seeped into his black eyes.

“Then I will dismiss all the attendants.”

The head lady-in-waiting led the maids out.

“Come here.”

Benjamin looked down at Charlotte.

“You drive people crazy.”

It’s wrong to torment someone who’s already in pain.

Steam rose from the bathtub.

Charlotte entered the water wearing a white negligee.

Water overflowed from the tub. She glanced down and straightened her waist.

Soap bubbles rose in fluffy mounds. As she leaned back, arms wrapped around her waist.

“Was your waist always this thin?”

“Hmm. It’s the same.”

“You’ve lost more weight.”

“Maybe it feels different because we’re in water.”

Charlotte leaned against him and exhaled.

“Your arms are thinner too.”

“Were they?”

His arms brushed against her.

Charlotte swept her dark red hair to the side. Her hair floated on the water’s surface.

“Why did you smoke cigarettes?”

“Is the scent still there?”

“No. Now it’s the fragrance…”

“I thought it had all faded away.”

“It’s very faint, so it has faded.”

Benjamin cradled Charlotte’s head. Her long hair tangled around his fingers like curly thistles.

“When I get sensitive, it tires those around me.”

She knows from before that Benjamin keeps his distance from Charlotte when he smokes cigarettes.

“Don’t come close to me when I smell of cigarettes. Charlotte.”

Charlotte rested her head on his shoulder.

What conversation did we have after that?

The conversation continued softly.

Her grandfather had visited early, and she felt sorry for needlessly worrying him.

Aaron had prepared bitter medicine, but it wasn’t too agonizing, perhaps because of memories of taking it as a child.

Such meaningless conversations grew longer and longer.

“…”

Feeling the touch of hands caressing her hair, Charlotte fell asleep.

[This is the timeline separator]

‘Your mother, yes, ah… That’s right. She knelt and begged. To let her raise you. That stubborn woman rubbing her hands together and begging, for the first time I felt a sense of fulfillment.’

‘Why, why…’

‘I kept you to see that sight once more, but now it’s not even amusing anymore.’

This was a fragment of the past residing beyond the memories of a previous life.

These were the words of her father as he trampled on her mother’s grave,

Drenched in alcohol, he was somewhat crazed.

‘From now on, Chloe is your mother. Forget the dead woman. Live quietly like before. Don’t let that breath of yours out.’

‘Why that woman…!’

Mom. Why did you leave only me in a place like this? Why only me.

‘What insolent words! From now on, you must serve that woman as your mother. Take away the memorial portrait from that child! You can’t even break free from the shadow of your dead birth mother and cause this trouble! Why did that wench leave behind such a nuisance…’

‘Stop it. Now, stop, stop it.’

‘Move that woman’s grave too. Get it out of this child’s sight!’

Her body sank as if being dragged down by the ankle from underground.

The family members dug up and moved her mother’s grave. At that time, Charlotte was powerless, and everything was taken away from her without any way to stop it.

At that time, she could have escaped. Charlotte was a nuisance after her mother died. But Charlotte had nowhere to go after leaving the family. Until the moment she was sold off as marriage material.

There’s nowhere to go.

She thought everything would end if she was abandoned even here.

[This is the timeline separator]

Benjamin stretched out his arm.

A delicate figure touched his arm. He stroked her long hair.

She buried her face in his neck.

Her body scent wafted strongly. It was like warm, fresh bread. It seemed like fullness would seep into the body if he took a bite.

Benjamin caressed her waist as she lay on her side.

Her curled up body gradually relaxed. The muscles tensed with nervousness also became languid.

“Mmm.”

Her long hair flowed down, revealing her nape.

Benjamin kissed it there. Languid breaths touched her skin and scattered.

The nightgown slipped down loosely. He pulled it back up, adjusted it, and covered her with the blanket.

“Charlotte.”

Benjamin whispered softly.

“It’s time to wake up.”

“It’s hot…”

“The fireplace must have been too high.”

When she buried her face, she could feel his steady heartbeat.

He kissed her shoulder. Short hair rustled softly.

The breath touching and scattering on her skin was ticklish. He gently bit her skin.

“Mmm.”

Charlotte moaned weakly.

All her senses were dulled because it was morning, but he had slipped in between.

“The New Year’s festival will proceed as planned. If it’s too much for your body, you can just make a brief appearance and leave.”

“I feel refreshed.”

“You seem a bit better now.”

Benjamin touched Charlotte’s cheek with the back of his hand.

“I’ll tell the head lady-in-waiting, so stop sleeping now. If you sleep any more, you’ll toss and turn later at night.”

The white blanket slipped down, and Charlotte tilted her head back.

Her white cheeks were spotlessly clear.

Her long hair flowed down in curls.

The slight fever that had risen from the cold was fine now.

“When the head lady-in-waiting comes, just finish getting lightly dressed and come outside. The sunlight is nice. It seems like a good day to get some fresh air outside, so let’s take a short walk.”

As he came out of the bedroom, attendants handed him his outer clothes.

Benjamin put his arms through the outer garment and nodded to the head lady-in-waiting.

The head lady-in-waiting keenly observed and went inside.

“Your Majesty, did you cough?”

“Was there anything unusual last night?”

“The strategist is waiting in the office.”

The attendants bowed their heads. Benjamin passed between them.

The lights in the corridor flickered.

The candlesticks were clean without a trace of soot.

As if the servants didn’t manage things carelessly, traces of delicate care were evident everywhere.

“Please go inside. All the aides are here.”

The doors to the imperial office opened.

The aides who had come out first at dawn also rose from their seats. Benjamin waved his arm for them to sit and passed the aides’ seats.

The chill of dawn clung to him.

Benjamin took off his jacket and entered the office. Rosquella followed Benjamin in.

“How is Her Majesty the Empress?”

“She has almost recovered.”

“This is the first time she’s seen a magical beast, isn’t it? We knights may be fine, but since it’s the Empress’s first experience with a magical beast, more careful attention is needed.”

Benjamin tapped the table with his fingertips.

“It’s bothersome.”

“What is bothersome?”

Benjamin slipped a quill pen between his fingers. The rhythmic hand gestures ceased.

“Isn’t she too detached?”

“You mean Her Majesty the Empress? The Empress was originally of a detached nature, wasn’t she?”

“Even though it’s her first encounter with a magical beast, she seems uninterested in her own well-being. She acts so calmly as if she’s completely stripped away all emotions…”

It keeps bothering me. Benjamin pressed his eyelids firmly.

You were always like that.

You, at the edge of my gaze, look off into the distance, stripping away your emotions one by one. Even now, you’re doing the same.

“Where does that detachment come from?”

That question remained unsolved.