In the end, I couldn’t go out that day. It had become too late to go out.

When I was in Yezar’s arms strolling through the garden, I called out as soon as I saw the backs of the servants to ask for help. But they disappeared quickly, as if they had some urgent business.

Thanks to that, I was carried in his arms like a princess until we entered the mansion.

And when we arrived at the mansion and I was about to put on the new shoes I had asked a servant for. Yezar said we should see the doctor to check if my foot was injured, so I was led away as I was.

As we were coming out after hearing that I was perfectly fine.

‘I’m sorry, madam. I just realized, my body is soaked with sweat. Were you alright while being carried?’

Hearing that, I felt I should change clothes or wash up. But if I washed up, it seemed the glove shop would close.

‘You must have finished preparing to go out. I’m worried you wasted time because of me.’

‘Not at all! Rather, I was the one who caused trouble. Besides, we can go out tomorrow. Surely, it won’t rain?’

And now, I was watching the heavy rain pouring down from inside the bedroom.

‘I wanted to give Yezar a gift quickly.’

Although I felt regretful, Yezar sitting next to me was too worried to go out in this rain.

“Are you still thinking of going out?”

“Wouldn’t it be okay if we went out quickly and came back?”

“No. It’s dangerous. What if the carriage slips while running on the wet road?”

“Yezar, you were going to train the knights in this rain.”

I had already woken up early to the sound of rain tapping on the window. When I noticed Yezar wasn’t next to me, I was looking for where he might have gone.

I thought surely he wouldn’t be training with the knights in this weather. But when I heard the loud shouts of the knights outside, I pulled the bell rope to call Ember.

Ember sighed and said that Yezar usually takes the knights out for training regardless of the weather, saying they shouldn’t skip training.

The ground would be wet and muddy, and they wouldn’t be able to see properly because of the rain. Worried that they might catch a cold, I headed towards Yezar.

Then, as if sensing my arrival like a ghost, Yezar quickly tried to send me back inside the mansion.

‘Madam. What if you catch a cold by coming out here?’

‘You’re more likely to catch a cold than me, Yezar. I know training is important, but isn’t it dangerous now with the rain obscuring vision and the ground being muddy and slippery?’

‘It’s alright. We can do it like we usually do.’

He was adamantly trying to continue the training. If it weren’t for the knights hiding behind me and taking my side, he might have continued.

‘Madam! Please save us. Cough cough. We’re all dying here.’

‘Training in such heavy rain. Cold, hungry, and sleepy.’

‘Madam has come all the way here to stop this. How can our lord not yield in front of the madam, cough!’

Thanks to the knights exaggerating, Yezar finally gave in and came inside the mansion. That’s why he was having breakfast with me and leisurely staying by my side.

As if he had never been displeased for a moment, he was now sticking close to my side like a squirrel.

“Yawn……”

‘I’m drowsy. Getting up at dawn and running around in that rain……’

I yawned involuntarily from fatigue. As I leaned back in the chair for a moment, Yezar spoke to me.

“Madam. If you’re tired, you can go to the bedroom and take a nap.”

“If I go to sleep, you’ll go to handle work, right?”

“No……”

As if! It’s all over your face.

“It’s okay to rest for a day. Doesn’t rest improve efficiency for the next day?”

“I know, but since inheriting the duke title, there was a time when I couldn’t control my emotions and worried those around me. So I wonder if I dare to indulge in such leisure.”

That must be related to Bertisha, right? I understand how he feels, but the more you immerse yourself in work and overwork yourself, the more you fail to take care of what’s most important. Why don’t people realize this?

“Everyone around you already knows how hard you’re working, Yezar. So it’s okay to relax. And if you focus only on work, you end up neglecting what’s most precious.”

Yes. Just like those people who loved Julieta but didn’t even realize she had left abruptly because they didn’t have time to properly care for her.

“Is that something you’ve experienced, madam?”

“Well. What do you think, Yezar?”

I deliberately turned the topic to him playfully. As if he had noticed my intention, he carefully took my hand.

“I thought you must have had such an experience since you mentioned it. But I wanted to say that I’ll make sure you don’t have such experiences in the future.”

It was a hand held gently, as if touching a fragile porcelain. I unknowingly held his hand back. Was it because of the drizzling rain that my heart felt strangely calm?

I wouldn’t have done this normally. The warmth transmitted through the fingertips was so cozy that I didn’t want to let go.

Is it because the day is dark and damp? I wish the sun would come out soon. So that I don’t do strange things.

“Yezar is someone who won’t neglect precious people. I didn’t expect you to extend such kindness to me, but thank you.”

He seemed to have more to say, but he simply nodded. I listened to the rain pattering against my ears while holding hands with him.

As I silently gazed out the window, he spoke first.

“Do you like rainy days, madam?”

I shook my head.

“It’s just a habit. I actually dislike rainy days.”

I disliked rainy days. The whole world is dark, the room is damp, and there’s no one to comfort you even when thunder strikes fiercely.

Of course, I wasn’t someone who feared thunder, but it was the influence of young Julieta’s memories on me.

A fragment of memory from the time when the people of the Orbetian Count’s family briefly avoided young Julieta.

That brief period when the family, immersed in grief after the Countess Orbetian passed away, locked themselves in their rooms and refused Julieta even when she came looking for them.

Perhaps, for a child, there was a rainy day during that period which felt too long.

When the nanny was busy with other matters and couldn’t stay by Julieta’s side, thunder struck with a flash in the dark rain.

Young Julieta was so startled and scared by the sound.

Hating the fact that she was alone in an empty room, she tried to go to her father and brothers who always adored her. Thinking that she might be able to escape this fear.

But none of them opened the door for the young child. The little child was invisible to them, immersed in the sorrow of losing their beloved wife and mother.

Perhaps they even resented Julieta, who had become the cause of their loved one’s death. Such an attitude momentarily affected the servants as well.

When Julieta reached out her hand, everyone turned their backs on her, saying they were busy.

Julieta naturally realized at that moment that no one wanted her and no one would comfort her. Without anyone to comfort her, she spent the night hugging tightly the doll her mother had once given her, listening to the striking thunder.

That memory was so piercingly sad and lonely that even though I wasn’t the owner of those emotions, I came to dislike rainy days. And I really hated being alone on such days.

“Actually, there was a day when it rained a lot when I was young.”

I wondered if I should tell Yezar this story. After all, it wasn’t my story. It wasn’t even emotions I had felt.

But my mouth freely recited young Julieta’s memory.

Perhaps someone wanted to comfort that young child.

If someone could understand even a little bit of that emotion that made the heart ache and tears well up, crying as if left alone in the world, rotting like the pooling rain……

As I was thinking this, Yezar pulled me into his arms. I felt his hand gently stroking my back.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t by your side then. You must have felt so lonely and scared, wanting to cry. You must have wished someone would comfort you.”

I should say, what are you talking about? Why should Yezar apologize for that? But something caught in my throat and words wouldn’t come out.

“I should have stayed by your side instead of trying to train with the knights at dawn.”

I should have said that he didn’t need to do this and pulled away from his embrace. Was it because of the gloomy sky unlike usual? Because of the falling rain? My body wouldn’t listen to me.

“……You’re by my side now. How do you know what I didn’t say?”

“Yes. I guess there’s still a lot I don’t know about you. So. At times like this, please lean on me. Tell me anything. I am Julieta’s husband after all.”

Surely, that child would have wanted to hear such comfort too. If there had been someone to offer a warm word then, she wouldn’t have gone crazy over someone who didn’t love her in the original novel.

Even in that moment when she was dying with a raging fever, she wouldn’t have closed her eyes calling for her father who was too busy to arrive.

Since I was possessed in that body and opened my eyes. Even if I hadn’t realized the fact that I had died. At least, if there had been time to exchange a few words enough to notice that the child who woke up had changed. Even I, who wasn’t the original owner of that body, felt very heartbroken seeing the back of Count Orbetian leaving after only receiving updates on her condition through the doctor.

“Then, you know. Can I stay in your arms a little longer?”