Regret With All Your Might (Completed Main Story) - Chapter 3
Everything had changed.
The nanny never came back, and I always ate bread and meat, fresh vegetables and fruit. My wardrobe was filled with bright dresses.
But what changed most of all was—
“Sis… ter?”
Little Essela, smelling sweetly of milk, was by my side.
I had never seen anyone so lovable in the world. She was a little girl with beautiful silver hair neatly combed. The lady gently tapped her apple-red cheek and said warmly,
“Yes. This is Olivia, your older sister. And this is Essela.”
Essela, who was only three, was so lovely she seemed like an angel who might vanish at a touch.
“An… angel.”
“Essela. Olivia says you look like an angel.”
Essela beamed brightly. Olivia, watching her with wonder, murmured absentmindedly,
“Essela, miss.”
“Hm?”
The lady frowned slightly.
“Call her Essela. After all, you’re sisters now.”
“But… the nanny told me to call her ‘miss.'”
“That nanny gave you the wrong instruction.”
Dare I even say the name of such a beautiful child?
But the lady nodded sincerely. Olivia whispered the name very softly.
“Es… sela.”
As if understanding her name, Essela smiled brightly again.
Something felt strange. Just a few days ago, she had thought she shouldn’t have come here at all—but now, she was so happy.
The lady also showed her a portrait—two angelic boys standing side by side.
“The older one is Conrad, eleven years old. The younger is Jade, eight. Call them ‘older brother,’ just like Essela does. Conrad is away at the academy, and Jade will be back soon.”
No sooner had the lady finished speaking than a crisp boy’s voice rang through the mansion.
“Mom!”
“Jade?”
Still holding Essela, the lady sprang up and hurried out of the room. Olivia hesitated briefly, then followed.
The boy who had dashed up the stairs flung himself into the hem of the lady’s dress.
“Jade. My sweet boy. Did you have fun?”
“Tch. You suddenly sent me to Grandma’s house. I hate you, Mom.”
“I’m sorry, sweetheart. But didn’t you miss me?”
“…Yeah.”
The silver-haired boy grinned shyly. Olivia’s chest tightened. The sight of the lady and the boy reminded her exactly of herself and her mother just a few months ago.
“But who’s that?”
The boy looked at Olivia. Ah… um. The lady hesitated for a moment, then smiled brightly.
“Jade. This is Olivia… your younger sister.”
“Younger sister? Not Essela? But she’s bigger than Essela!”
“Yeah. She’s six.”
Jade beamed at Olivia without a trace of doubt. Olivia had simply assumed this was natural.
But Conrad was different.
“She’s not my sister.”
The eleven-year-old boy, tall for his age and with cold eyes, snapped the words like an arrow. With that single icy remark, Olivia was pushed back outside the circle once more.
“Conrad.”
“She’s not my sister. She’s filthy—”
“Conrad!”
Olivia flinched at the sharp voice. But Conrad himself glared at her with eyes far too old for a child.
“…Olivia. Could you step outside for a moment?”
“…Yes.”
When she closed the lady’s door behind her, Jade asked curiously,
“What did you do?”
“Nothing… why?”
“Then why did my brother call you filthy?”
Olivia couldn’t answer.
It happened one day. The lady said she was going out for the first time in a while.
She kissed each child on the cheek, from Conrad down to Essela, then paused briefly when she saw Olivia.
Olivia held a flicker of hope. Maybe…
But the lady only patted Olivia’s head. Watching this, Jade asked innocently,
“Why didn’t you kiss Olivia?”
“Right!”
Essela chimed in agreement. Jade tilted his head.
“Olivia calls you ‘madam’ too, and you said she’s my sister, right?”
Smiling faintly, the lady patted Olivia’s head once more.
“…Because I’m not this child’s mother.”
“Huh?”
“Never mind. I’ll be back soon.”
“Okay! Have a good trip!”
Conrad glared at her, but Olivia didn’t mind.
.
.
.
“Ta-da! I wrote a fairy tale for you! It took me a whole week!”
It was the first day the lady had left the mansion. Jade held up a sketchbook proudly. For days, he’d been secretly drawing something—and beneath his crooked handwriting were pictures of beautiful princesses.
“This is Essela—the Amethyst Princess. And this is Olivia.”
Jade grinned brightly and pointed to Olivia’s eyes.
“Olivia is the Emerald Princess.”
At those words, Olivia’s heart swelled and tears spilled over. Though Jade looked startled, she couldn’t stop crying. Essela, confused, began crying too.
“Sister, don’t cry. Hweeeng.”
“Hey! Nobody cry! Heeeng.”
When Jade, sniffling, pulled both Olivia and Essela into a hug, Olivia realized, warmed by his embrace, that she wasn’t alone anymore.
She thought that as long as she had the world’s most beautiful Essela and Jade—and the lady—everything would be fine.
But that happiness was short-lived.
“It’s all your fault!”
She was playing with Essela when Conrad suddenly rushed in and shoved Olivia hard. Caught off guard, Olivia tumbled to the floor.
Essela burst into tears, but Conrad didn’t comfort her.
He couldn’t. Because Conrad was crying too.
The boyish Conrad wailed loudly through his sobs,
“If only you hadn’t come! If only you weren’t here! Then our mom—!”
Lightning flashed. It was raining that day. The lady’s carriage had overturned on her way back from her parents’ estate, House Ha Elquin.
She had gone to her family because she was divorcing the duke.
It hadn’t been long since the lady’s funeral.
Throughout the rainy funeral, Essela had kept smiling—but now, sensing something was wrong, she began searching for her mother. No matter how much the nanny and maids tried to soothe her, nothing worked.
“Where’s Mommy?”
Essela, blinking her big eyes anxiously, started to cry. Olivia, watching quietly through the open door crack, gently stepped in.
“Sister!”
Tears welled in Essela’s large eyes when she saw Olivia.
“Mommy isn’t coming. I miss Mommy.”
Seeing Essela sobbing reminded Olivia of herself just weeks ago—searching for her mother, knowing she wouldn’t come, yet missing her every night.
Without a word, Olivia tightly held Essela’s hand. Only then did Essela stop calling for her mother. The nanny and maids, who had been eager to chase Olivia away, fell silent.
After that, Essela often fell ill.
“Mommy, Mommy…”
Her angelic face burned with fever as she called for her mother. But no matter how much she called, the lady never appeared saying, “Essela, my darling.” Eventually, Essela clenched her lips shut and wept silently.
Even six-year-old Olivia understood what it meant for one’s heart to break—it was that pitiful.
But there was no one to turn to for help. Jade had gone to the lady’s family estate, Conrad kept his door shut and spoke to no one, and the duke… was nowhere to be seen.
On the large bed, Essela exhaled hot breaths. A bittersweet scent of tears and milk hung in the air.
Sensing Olivia’s gaze, Essela slowly met her eyes. Her lovely violet eyes were brimming with tears.
“Sister… Mommy… isn’t coming.”
Her childish voice sounded defeated. Olivia bit her lip.
What could she say to make this child smile?
The only words that came to mind were what the nanny had told her most often:
“Your very existence is tormenting House Madelaine.”
“…I’m sorry.”
“Hm?”
At Olivia’s tiny voice, Essela asked again as if she hadn’t heard. Seeing Essela’s weakly blinking eyes, Olivia felt tears welling up again.
“Sis… ter, I’m sor—”
Just then—
The door burst open with a loud bang. Startled, Olivia turned to see the duke striding in with fierce intensity.
She had never seen such a terrifying expression. Frightened, Olivia instinctively gripped Essela’s hand. The duke, glaring at her with eyes like a predator ready to devour its prey, roughly yanked her arm.
“Ah!”
Essela, pulled along by the motion, cried out in pain. Olivia quickly let go of Essela’s hand and turned back. Startled, Essela began wailing loudly.
Her arm felt as if it might tear from its socket. Olivia looked pleadingly at the maids and butler, but no one dared stop the duke.
“Miss. Please don’t cry.”
“Daddy! Sister! Sister!”
The flustered nanny tried to calm Essela, but she wouldn’t stop crying. Reaching toward Essela, who was sobbing pitifully while looking at her, Olivia struggled desperately.
“Let me go! I need to go to Essela—”
SLAM—the heavy door shut. Essela, reaching out to her while crying, disappeared behind it.
I have to go to her. Just as Olivia lifted her eyes toward the duke with resentment—
“How dare you.”
The duke’s voice, hissing through clenched teeth, sent chills down her spine. Instantly, Olivia froze like ice.
“How dare you call my daughter by her name?”
Flames seemed to leap from the duke’s eyes. It felt like standing before a fearsome wild beast. Olivia trembled uncontrollably, forgetting even the pain in her arm gripped so tightly it might break.
Her legs felt like they might give out any second. She had never experienced anything like this.
Strange. He was her father—so why did he look at her as if she were the most hated thing in the world?
“D-Daddy…”
“Who? Who’s your father?”
His voice was cold enough to freeze everything. His words were as sharp as his tone. Olivia blinked once at the invisible line drawn between them—and lowered her head.
The duke spoke quietly, struggling to control his emotions.
“Listen carefully.”
“…”
“Until I give you permission, never again—”
“…”
“Speak to Essela.”
“But… the lady told me to call her ‘sister.’ Essela’s sister.”
Thinking of the word ‘sister’ eased her fear of the duke. Olivia lifted her head to look at him.
I didn’t do anything wrong.
Just as she was about to speak the words filling her mouth—
“…If only it hadn’t been you.”
The duke spoke in a pained, strained voice. Olivia’s breath caught in her throat.
The duke’s expression—just moments ago crushing her arm—crumbled. His violet eyes trembled with genuine sorrow.
“…Hazel would still be alive.”
That impossible hypothetical struck Olivia’s heart like a hammer. The words she’d been about to say vanished instantly.
“Your misfortune… has made me… and my home… like this.”
“…”
“Don’t pass that misfortune on to Essela.”
The duke, who had gripped her arm as if to crush it, slowly released his hold. Withdrawing his indifferent gaze, he turned and walked back into the room. As the door opened, Essela’s crying could be heard.
“Daddy, Sister—why did you chase her out?”
“Essela. Don’t cry.”
Before the door closed, Olivia heard the duke’s voice soothing Essela—completely different from how he spoke to her.
As the door clicked shut, Olivia sank to the floor right where she stood—partly from released tension, partly from the pain in her arm.
Only then did the cold air of the hallway brush her cheeks—a stark contrast to the warmth inside that room.
Passing maids and servants glanced at her, but not one offered comfort or helped her up.
Olivia looked down at her arm, head bowed. The sleeve of the dress the lady had bought her was hopelessly wrinkled.
She had been so happy when she received this dress. She’d even asked if someone like her deserved something so precious—and the lady had smiled, just a little.
“…Huh… hic.”
Bitter tears spilled out. Her arm hurt, Essela’s crying hurt, and the duke’s words hurt most of all.
“…I didn’t… do anything…”
The words she’d held back finally came out through her sobs. She hadn’t done anything wrong. The lady had told her it wasn’t her fault.
“If only it hadn’t been you.”
The duke’s anguished, twisted face remained vivid in her mind.
He was mistaken. She hadn’t done anything—she’d only come to this mansion. Yet his words kept tormenting her.
What if it were true? A sudden wave of fear washed over her.
Missing her mother—the duchess—Olivia burst into tears.
She cried until her eyes swelled and her throat grew dry. And even then, not a single person came to comfort her.
“…My lady, Princess.”
At the voice calling her, Olivia blinked slowly. Beyond the carriage window, the imperial palace came into view. Sally let out a small laugh.
“We’ve arrived. What were you thinking so deeply about?”
“…Yeah.”
Olivia murmured. It felt just like a dream.
Memories of when the lady was still at the mansion—when everyone was harmonious and peaceful. Even the duke’s words: “If only you hadn’t come…”
If she hadn’t entered House Madelaine, would the lady truly still be alive? That impossible hypothetical left a raw wound in Olivia’s heart.
But no matter what anyone said now, Olivia was the eldest daughter of House Madelaine. She was also the fiancée of Crown Prince Leopold Franz.
Though neither her family nor Leopold had yet treated her with true sincerity, Olivia loved them with all her heart.
Because her mother had always said: “If you give your best, it will come true.” And that couldn’t possibly be wrong.
Male lead says he’s pregnant — and it’s female lead’s child
Something seems a bit off about this world.
Wang Zhao thought as she watched a pregnant man walking towards her…
Intro
Female lead finds herself in a world where the men who possess the ability to bear children.
As she navigates this unfamiliar reality, she is caught off guard by the sudden appearance of her boyfriend, who reveals that he is pregnant.
Is this truly her boyfriend?
Why can’t she recall any details about their time together?
She begins to doubt whether the child her boyfriend is carrying is even hers.
Is there a hidden reason behind her amnesia, or could it be a side effect of her sudden arrival in this strange new world?
Just when it seems the protagonist’s life couldn’t become any more entangled, her ex-boyfriend makes an unexpected appearance, raising questions about the protagonist’s past.
__________
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MANGA DISCUSSION
1 Comment
Chapter Comments (106)
So much non recyclable trash
The fl and the ml are ao cute !
Ethela … I thought you were better
Inline Comments (481)
“I knew Sister got scolded every time we played together.”
And here I thought she was the only one with a tiny bit of sense…. I guess u can never expect too much from this family
“They say you deliberately choose only dark-colored dresses. Could that be why y
Hey Edwin, not too much now 🤣. “Positively ashen” might as well say pale as a ghost
But her pleasant mood shattered completely upon hearing the report from the maid
Ohh crown princess is in some deep deep troubleee🤣… that’s what u get for being on a high horse
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VKotaku28
I knew it!!! The kind step mother would die