I slowly raised my head and met the red eyes.

I knew through the priest that Jade would visit, but I was flustered when we met.

“…Have I finally gone mad?”

Eyes filled with shock, pupils trembling slightly, a deranged voice mixed with rough breathing.

Over the years, Jade’s reaction to seeing me, who was believed to be dead, was denial.

“…La, Rien.”

Jade, whom I was seeing for the first time since the day we fought in the alley, felt unfamiliar.

Was it because his features had become sharper?

His eyes were dark, as if he hadn’t been sleeping properly.

Though dressed in a neat uniform, the atmosphere of loneliness couldn’t be hidden.

“…Are you, alive, Larien?”

He was completely broken.

“Ja, de.”

I inadvertently answered his continued calling.

“How did you…”

Jade’s expression was a mix of confusion, as if he was certain it was me.

“Was I not crazy…? It wasn’t a mistake, was it?”

Jade, who approached with wide strides, hugged me.

“It really, Larien, was you.”

The reaction pushed away Blanche, who had been holding my dress.

‘Blanche!’

Blanche’s knee was scraped as she fell to the ground.

“Let, let go, Jade.”

The more I tried to push Jade away, the more he held on without budging.

Blanche, who got up bravely without crying, opened and closed her tiny lips.

“Mom, Shu-shu is okay.”

Jade buried his head in my shoulder. The strong scent of citrus, which I smelled after a long time, came in.

I could feel Jade’s labored breathing.

‘Jade must have been very surprised too.’

He stroked the back of my head over and over.

As if to confirm that I was alive.

“…Jade. I’d appreciate it if you could calm down a bit and let go.”

What should I say?

I couldn’t decide what excuse to make to get out of this situation.

“I thought I’d never see you again. I thought this was a dream too, but it’s not. I can finally touch you like this…”

He trembled heavily as he expressed his longing.

“My heart, it hurt so much I wanted to rip it out.”

“…”

“Whenever I realized you were dead, you, who hated pain the most in the world, died so many times in front of me. Unable to save you, unable to revive you, you always died.”

“…”

“And now you’re alive like this… and you’re telling me to let go?”

I realized that telling him to let go was like stabbing him with a dagger after hearing how Jade had been living.

I couldn’t understand Jade’s pain. I was just desperate to separate him.

Perhaps, the one who had changed the most wasn’t Jade, but me.

‘You haven’t changed at all.’

I was still a precious person to Jade. Even at moments when I should have stopped thinking about him, Jade had never forgotten me, not even once.

Twenty years old.

“If I could go back to before you died, if that chance was given to me, I swore I wouldn’t even tear up the train ticket…”

He had been living with regret for the days when he was young and clumsy, and had hurt me.

“I really, missed you so much, Larien…”

When I realized that was a misconception, I felt an inexplicable sense of relief that even I couldn’t understand.

‘How selfish of me to be glad that Jade hadn’t forgotten me, when I had hoped he would live well.’

It was a selfish emotion, even in my own opinion.

“I’m sorry, Jade. For leaving without telling you.”

Jade was silent for a long time.

“Larien.”

His voice, which finally spoke, had changed considerably.

“The fire, did you set it?”

“Jade. That…”

Jade had realized that the fire in the annex wasn’t a simple accident.

“Was the reason you deceived me and ran away because of that child?”

His voice, which had contorted painfully again before regaining its coldness, was icy.

That child.

A term used for strangers, devoid of any emotion.

‘It’s the first time father and daughter have met, and neither of them knows.’

Even though I was the one who hid everything, seeing Jade treat Blanche coldly made my heart ache.

“Larien. I’ve been wondering for a while, who is the child’s father?”

“…That’s.”

Even on the day Jade first caught me pregnant, he had asked whose child it was.

“You still don’t seem to want to tell me. After you left like that…”

Jade frowned for a moment, as if even mentioning it was terrible.

“Do you have any idea how I’ve been living…”

“Jade…”

“You don’t care at all, do you, Larien?”

Jade’s reddened eyes clearly showed that blood vessels had burst.

“If I hadn’t met you, you were planning to never appear until the end, weren’t you?”

He gripped my shoulders strongly. It was a touch full of resentment and hatred.

“Marquis! Stop hurting our mom!”

Blanche, who had been quiet all along, shouted at Jade.

‘…How did she know Jade was a marquis?’

Not even scared, Blanche pushed Jade’s body from the side. Jade, separating from me, gave her a bewildered look.

“I thought the Marquis was nice, but you’re mean! Why are you hurting mom! Shu-shu will bite you!”

Blanche bared her cute teeth, glaring fiercely.

“Shu-shu really hates the Marquis! Get away from mom right now!”

“I don’t know who your real father is, but he certainly raised you well.”

“Shu-shu doesn’t have a daddy!”

I hastily covered Blanche’s excited mouth.

“…You don’t have, a father?”

Jade muttered Blanche’s words, grinding his molars.

‘Oh, what should I do? If Jade finds out that Blanche is his daughter like this?’

The situation that my past self had worried about could happen.

“Larien. Why did you deceive me? For what reason? Because I didn’t let you go to Trianon? Because I didn’t grant your request to pretend not to know back then?”

Jade’s incessant questions poured out.

“How could you do this, no matter what.”

Eventually, despair seeped into those words.

“I thought you died because of me. As if losing my parents wasn’t enough, I really thought I had killed you…”

Jade, recalling that day, swallowed his painful emotions and shook his head.

“…Well, we’ll talk about that later. The only thing that matters to me right now is that you’ve come back alive.”

“Jade. I’m going back. Can’t you just think that I died that day?”

Jade grabbed my right hand.

“Do you think I’m going to lose you again?”

In an utterly dry voice, he made it clear that he wouldn’t back down easily.

“Larien! Blanche!”

Seeing Earl Boston running towards us, Blanche spread her arms towards him.

“Grandfather!”

“Yes, my treasure. Where did you go? Do you know how much your mother looked for you? My goodness, what happened to your knee?”

Blanche whimpered at Earl Boston’s concern as he examined her knee.

“Gran, Grandfather. Shu-shu hurts so much.”

“Who did this to you, hm?”

Blanche fidgeted and pointed at Jade.

“Huh?”

Jade, at whom Blanche’s fingertip was pointed, inhaled in disbelief.

“Marquis Rowe. Please let go of my daughter now.”

“…Daughter?”

Earl Boston requested Jade while holding Blanche.

“Right, Earl Boston is your uncle. Was it the Earl who hid you all this time, Larien?”

Jade let go of me after chuckling and saying he now understood how things had been.

“That’s enough now. Earl. Do something about that noisy brat. My eardrums are about to burst.”

Blanche, whose gaze met Jade’s frowning one, stopped crying and burrowed into Earl Boston’s arms.

“Marquis Rowe! Your words are too harsh! Larien, let’s go!”

Earl Boston, seeming to feel sorry for Blanche, pulled me away.

Jade just watched fiercely without following.

Even after getting in the carriage, my heartbeat wouldn’t calm down with his gaze following me.

The irregular beating sound echoed in my ears.

Earl Boston finally managed to calm Blanche down and put her to sleep.

“Tsk, look at him talking like that without even knowing it’s his daughter. To think such a guy is my granddaughter’s father. I can’t bear to see that.”

He clicked his tongue while patting Blanche’s back.

“Of all days, I didn’t expect to encounter Marquis Rowe at the Grand Temple today. This won’t do. Larien. Go back to Lecahe immediately.”

“…Uncle, the truth is Blanche isn’t completely cured yet. If by any chance the outbreak progresses, her life can’t be guaranteed.”

I struggled to convey the fact that Blanche needed to stay in Langransha as a saint candidate.

“His Holiness the Pope wants to nominate Blanche as the next generation’s saint?”

“Yes. For now, he asked to treat her just as a saint candidate. Because if she becomes a saint, she won’t be able to live freely.”

“Anyway, that condition means you have to stay in Langransha for a while. Whether it’s a candidate or whatever, she needs to receive education.”

Earl Boston sighed deeply, realizing we couldn’t run away from Jade.

“Larien. You must absolutely not be discovered by Marquis Rowe. I could see it earlier. Why you didn’t tell the Marquis about your pregnancy.”

Even if pushing Blanche wasn’t intentional, done out of surprise at seeing me.

‘Uncle is right. I absolutely must not be discovered by Jade.’

To return to the peaceful daily life, the fact that Blanche was his daughter had to be thoroughly hidden.

Absolutely.