164. I’m in Pain
2024.03.12.
It was a reaction close to instinct.
Yuan Pelliese, her face pale with shock, opened the door without hesitation.
The shoulders that had been tense with anxiety slumped and sagged as soon as she saw his face—tired, yet clean and beautiful.
“How could you lie like this—!”
“It’s not a lie.”
Clade Euphris smoothly intercepted her words. Following his slight nod, her gaze dropped to see his black pants soaked and glistening with a sticky liquid clinging to his thigh. Yuan immediately turned ashen.
“I’m in pain.”
“…Then you should go see a doctor.”
“Aren’t you a doctor?”
“…I’ve never taken the exam.”
“Then consider this the reckoning for pretending to be one all this time.”
In an instant, Yuan was shoved backward as the man pushed into the room.
Once the door shut firmly behind him, Clade Euphris walked toward the chaise longue with the familiarity of someone entering his own room. His exaggerated limp only made her more exasperated.
He firmly placed a side chair beside him, then leaned against the chaise, looking at Yuan as if urging her to come and treat him.
Yuan simply stood still, silently watching his shameless, beautiful face.
“What are you doing?”
“Leave.”
“I’m in pain.”
“You’re walking just fine.”
Clade Euphris tightened his lips at her unyielding reply.
His eyes, slowly darkening, suddenly flashed. Without hesitation, he drew his sword from the scabbard dangling at his side.
Startled by the sharp presence of the blade, Yuan barely had time to widen her eyes before he plunged the sword into one of his thighs, already resting on the chaise.
Yuan froze, mouth agape, unable to scream, staring at the blood that gushed out the moment the blade was withdrawn.
“I’m in pain.”
When Yuan remained frozen, breath caught, Clade Euphris wiped away the calm expression on his face and raised the sword once more.
This time, the sharp tip of the blade pointed toward his other, untouched thigh. Yuan snapped back to her senses and shouted sharply.
“Are you insane?”
“Yes.”
Just before the blade could split the other leg, Yuan lunged forward and slapped his hand away.
Had she not altered its course, the blade would have torn through flesh. Instead, it sank deeply into the edge of the chaise, piercing through the cushion and wooden base.
On the antique crimson chaise, a darker red pooled—his blood.
Tears welled up in Yuan Pelliese’s wide eyes. Her face flushed bright red, swelling as if it might burst from rage at any moment.
Yet the man’s face remained utterly unyielding, indifferent to her reaction.
“Why else would you come to me unless I do this?”
“You’re truly, truly insane—”
“Or should I call Eugene Kimfri instead?”
Clade Euphris growled, already poised to draw his sword again.
“Just heal me. That’s your specialty, isn’t it?”
“Why are you doing this? Why go this far?”
“There’s something I want to ask you.”
Clade Euphris dropped his fierce tone and answered calmly, watching Yuan, who couldn’t tear her eyes from the thigh gushing blood.
Yuan lifted her trembling hands but couldn’t bring herself to touch the wound. Instead, she raised her head and glared at him.
As tears spilled down both cheeks, the wild, almost manic light in his eyes momentarily dimmed.
Finally, meeting her gaze from where she sat on the side chair, he spoke.
“Do you still love me?”
He was truly a cruel man.
Yuan looked at Clade Euphris as one would look at a sworn enemy—one who had just declared they would kill her.
In the middle of the night.
After she had barely managed to escape thoughts of him, savoring the peace of the quiet day.
After he had stabbed his own healthy thigh and twisted her insides with the words “I’m in pain.”
And the only thing he had to say was not “I love you,” but “Do you still love me?”
Yuan had asked Clade Euphris countless times whether he loved her.
Even when he had warned her that unless she proved he wasn’t hurting her, she shouldn’t even dream of divorce, she had stared only at his lips, asking why he was doing this.
Even though she knew better than anyone that he didn’t love her—still trying to understand him.
Trying to console herself with the thought that perhaps he loved her a little, but that they were now walking different paths, forcing him to act so cruelly.
And yet, after all this, the only thing he could say was, “Do you still love me?”
A bitter laugh slipped through her lips.
What on earth did her feelings matter to him?
Ever since Yuan Pelliese realized she loved him, she had never once denied that love.
She knew better than anyone how a life filled with regret felt—knowing that if you died without properly saying “I love you,” that absence would haunt you forever.
I love you.
So much that she despised and loathed herself for loving him.
So much that she was ready to throw away the rest of her life.
I only wish that you, having endured such a wounded existence, may now live happily, like everyone else.
But now, Yuan understood something too.
Even if Clade Euphris didn’t love her, there remained something—guilt, or rather, a strange, incomprehensible attachment even he couldn’t explain.
Perhaps mixed in with that was the thick, unshakable resentment and anger born from her betrayal.
If she answered that she loved him, Clade Euphris would use that as leverage to demand even more from her, to shake her further.
Perhaps he would insist she stay silent, lock herself away somewhere, and receive treatment—anything to avoid having to kill Bollonico Euphris.
As he said, he was legally her husband. Unless he granted her a divorce, or unless Bollonico Euphris himself came directly to take her away by force of authority,
she would die pointlessly, having accomplished none of what she had resolved to do.
Yuan Pelliese reached her hand toward the hem of the thin dress she wore as nightclothes, her eyes deeply shadowed.
The only sound cutting through the silence was the sharp ripping of fabric.
Without a word, she reached for his thigh and pressed the torn cloth firmly against the gushing wound.
The man, who hadn’t uttered a single groan, stared intently at her composed profile.
Quietly, Yuan tightly bandaged his thigh. Each passing moment felt heavy and oppressive.
She opened her mouth several times, lips trembling, but failed each time. No matter how hard she tried to gather only the most painful memories of him to force out the answer “I don’t love you,” she simply couldn’t.
Even if she tore open his flesh and crushed his heart, she doubted she could ever say she didn’t love him.
Just as the sorrowful urge to cry rose to the back of her throat,
something slightly heavy and warm landed silently on her small shoulder.
Her hands, tying the fabric into a knot, abruptly froze.
Clade Euphris had lowered his weary head, leaning it gently against Yuan’s slightly tilted shoulder.
His hot forehead touched her straight collarbone and pale shoulder.
His steady exhalations poured against her chest—warm, slightly hot breath. Soon, a low voice cut through that warmth.
“I’m in pain.”
His golden hair, so longed for, brushed against her shoulder again and again. The soft, animal-like sound of him nuzzling tickled her left ear.
“Don’t you have anything to say to someone in pain?”
The pained groan, like that of a wounded young beast, soaked through her entire body.
Yuan held on for a long moment before finally gripping Clade Euphris’s cheeks with trembling hands.
Then she met his eyes. His gaze, like a dawn sea, trembled faintly.
Yuan quietly pulled his face closer. Her trembling lips descended upon his closed eyelids.
His eyes, which she had always wanted to taste, were now beneath her lips, beneath the thin skin.
She kissed his eyes gently, as if bestowing a blessing, and whispered.
“Be happy.”
At the end of pain that vanished like a lie,
an infinitely soft and tender phrase, all the more cruel, marked the final period.
***
“Clade.”
Lancelot called out repeatedly to Clade Euphris, who had returned at dawn.
Only after a long while did Clade Euphris, sprawled lifelessly on the sofa, lift his empty eyes to meet him.
Lancelot sensed immediately that the relationship between Clade and Yuan Pelliese had completely broken down.
“I’ve been trying to understand you—trying harder than anyone else in this world. I’m proud to say I’ve done everything to comprehend your heart. But Clade.”
Lancelot gripped Clade Euphris’s firm shoulder.
The hand holding the wandering Clade bore the full weight of over ten years.
“We must now walk our own path.”
Seeing Clade Euphris staring at him without even a flicker of movement, Lancelot persuaded him with a heart like one cutting into his own flesh.
“The Count Kimfri estate has been more cooperative than we ever imagined. It’s been proven over the past decade that they aren’t Igor Euphris’s men. Just look at how a once-wealthy house has gradually grown poor. This is our chance.”
Clade Euphris couldn’t possibly not know this.
It was he who had mocked himself bitterly when the old count’s secret—something the old man had kept sealed within his own grandson—had instead come from Clade Euphris’s mouth, declaring he would stay here.
“When I warned you, Clade. The path you’re taking—something you must focus on without distraction.”
Seeing Clade’s hollow eyes fixed on him, Lancelot quickly added,
“What happened when you went to your wife? Does she still love you?”
Lancelot’s deep caramel-colored eyes swept over Clade Euphris’s bloodied thigh, the cloth wrapped around it, and the dark stain soaking through.
Clade Euphris stared blankly into space, offering no reply—seeming as if he might collapse entirely if nudged.
Like a fortress abandoned after war—immense, yet utterly desolate.
A thick darkness of despair pressed down on the room, starkly opposite the brightening morning.
Lancelot sensed that Yuan Pelliese had given Clade Euphris, who had only recently awakened to his own emotions, no chance to wander at all.
Male lead Asks for a Divorce Every Day
It’s not often you come across a plot like this in the female-dominant genre — make sure to check it out!
This is a novel I’m planning to reread as well.
The male lead is strong, skilled in martial arts, and not the usual fragile type you often see in matriarchal novels.
Meanwhile, the female lead is a scientist—rational and logical. Even when she falls for the male lead, she doesn’t let her emotions cloud her decisions.
If you push through the first few chapters, you’ll gradually find the story really intriguing.
It has a mix of mystery, detective elements, and romance.
The author’s writing style is like crafting a puzzle—except they deliberately leave out a few pieces, making it hard to predict what happens next, yet keeping you hooked.
In the end, everything will come together and be explained.
One-sentence summary: Wife, stop playing with beakers and look at me!
In a laboratory accident, research scientist Zhu Wansheng accidentally travels to a matriarchal world. The original owner of the body is an eighteen-year-old only daughter of a wealthy rouge merchant, already married with a handsome young man.
Zhu Wansheng grins: Nice! She always said she was heaven’s favorite granddaughter. After a life of toil in her previous life, she can enjoy blessings in this one.
However, her joy lasts no more than three seconds as bad news arrives: the original owner’s family is about to go bankrupt, and her husband wants a divorce.
Even worse, she’s stuck with a research system full of restrictions.
Zhu Wansheng: ? Is this the destiny of a research dog?
——
Faced with this mess, Zhu Wansheng pours herself a bowl of wine to drown her sorrows. In her drunken haze, her husband arrives.
His figure is imposing, holding a long sword, with a dignified air that captivates Zhu Wansheng.
Gu Yingqing, however, looks at the alcohol-reeking Zhu Wansheng with undisguised disgust and coldly asks, “Divorce or not?” The intoxicated Zhu Wansheng mumbles vaguely, “I think… it’s not… it’s not… impossible!”
——
The next day, after sobering up, Zhu Wansheng is full of energy, rolling up her sleeves ready to make a big move. As for yesterday? She has no memory of it.
Zhu Wansheng is ambitious; a research dog fears nothing!
Upgrading rouge, extracting fragrances, producing perfumes, researching lipsticks… all shall bow to the power of modern technology!
The original owner’s dying rouge shop is revitalized. Her mother is pleased and with a wave of her hand, passes on the family business to her. As she takes control and her experimental results gain popularity, it’s the pinnacle of her life…
——
But there are always those who can’t stand to see her doing well. Jealousy, scheming, assassination attempts – they want nothing less than her life.
The person who has always kept his distance from her suddenly holds her tightly in his arms, eyes full of concern.
She is unharmed, but he falls into a pool of blood…
Zhu Wansheng feels guilty, “I can grant you one wish.”
Gu Yingqing tentatively circles his arms around her, carefully resting his head in the crook of her neck, pleading softly, “I regret it. Can we not divorce?”
Zhu Wansheng: ? When did I agree to a divorce?
[Small Theater]
The newly developed rouge is beautifully packaged, and Zhu Wansheng is eager to try it.
Gu Yingqing suddenly appears: “My lady, may I apply it for you?”
Cool fingertips lightly brush her lips. His Adam’s apple bobs as he leans in for a light bite.
Zhu Wansheng: ?
Gu Yingqing: It smells so good, I wanted to taste it…
On a warm spring day, Zhu Wansheng tries a new perfume: “Spring Night.” Gu Yingqing corners her against a wall.
Warm breath lingers on her neck.
“My lady, from now on, may I test the fragrances for you?”
[Humorous female scientist vs scheming live-in son-in-law male lead]
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