Relentless time passed, leaving him behind.
Counting the seemingly insignificant wedding anniversaries that returned every year, Chaeha often felt the reality of another year gone by.
While people said time was a remedy, that it faded and dulled with time.
Far from being okay, his heart had decayed and crumbled instead.
The feeling that someone’s absence might never become familiar was like painting the remaining pages of life entirely in black and white.
A world without any color, a world without any meaning.
That was Kwon Chaeha’s world after the disappearance of Min Seolwon.
The borders of Seolwon had become a thick longing, following him like a shadow.
During meals, work, and even when sleeping, it never seemed to fade.
Unconsciously, it became a part of him.
ads
Her breath, her eyes, her heart. Seolwon lingered in everything.
However, despite only the borders remaining, the emptiness inside couldn’t be filled, and her presence was elusive.
Even after several seasons since she left, Chaeha didn’t give up on chasing traces of his wife. No, he couldn’t give up.
The hope that Seolwon was still alive was like a faint breath in his lungs.
He still went to the sea every weekend, never letting go of his phone.
He did everything that could be described as an effort.
He desperately tried to grasp even the smallest clue, but no matter how long he waited, Seolwon didn’t return.
The silver droplets of dew on the silver bellflowers preserved under a glass dome began to turn into a fine powder over time.
As if telling him not to search anymore, not to wait anymore.
Thus, several seasons had already passed.
ads
It was the fourth year since Seolwon disappeared, and once again, the wedding anniversary had arrived.
If she were alive, she would have turned thirty now.
Chaeha, who was twenty-nine when she disappeared, was already thirty-three.
One useless year had simply changed the number. Twenty-nine or thirty-three, he was still wandering around the same place.
Without fail, this anniversary, he was in one place. Seolwon’s garden.
Holding the cold doorknob instead of her hand, Chaeha entered the cottage.
The scenery was still the same.
The scene inside the cottage, darkening with the night, resembled his heart.
He had brought a bottle of alcohol to get completely drunk, but once he entered, he didn’t feel like drinking.
As he moved his steps hesitantly, Chaeha ran his fingers over Seolwon’s photo on the wooden desk.
ads
It was a photo without a speck of dust, well-worn from his touch.
It was also the only photo of her.
“Min Seolwon.”
As always, Chaeha whispered useless words towards the silent person.
“When will you come back? I’m curious about thirty-year-old you, you know.”
Whether she still had that expression, whether her gaze remained firm without wavering, he wondered, gazing at her forever-frozen face.
Whether the itchiness is still persistent, whether the fragrance still emanates from those delicate fingers.
There was so much he wanted to confirm.
“Do you remember? That winter night… On Hyung’s memorial day, you comforted me. Back then, I thought I hugged you because I was drunk. But looking back, it was Min Seolwon who hugged me, not you.”
The gaze in Seolwon’s photo seemed to reproach him for realizing it now.
After spending that night, he should have faced his feelings more honestly.
ads
“I know. Apologizing a hundred or a thousand times won’t be enough. So, just come back now. If you come back, I’ll really do well…”
The pitiful words couldn’t conclude.
It was a limit. Speaking to himself like this, holding back tears while looking at her photo.
Thunk, his finger weakly flicked the wooden table.
Simultaneously, thunk, even the last thread of reason he had maintained snapped.
Crash!
After roughly pushing aside the bottle of alcohol, Chaeha sprang up from the cottage.
With a grip on the steering wheel, he headed straight to his destination.
Yangyang, Gangwon-do, the breakwater that swallowed Seolwon.
Whether he was in his right mind or not, whether it mattered wasn’t important.
ads
Chaeha no longer had the confidence to see Seolwon’s apparition.
The fantasy that shattered like bubbles at the tip of his fingers, he could no longer endure it.
So, he decided. He decided to go to her side.
But disappointingly, that decision was blocked.
“Vice President! You can’t! Vice President!”
At the end of the breakwater, on the cliff edge of life, it was Secretary Jung who pulled him back.
Because of excessive loyalty and overzealous attention, Jung’s long arms successfully prevented him from leaping into the sea.
Somehow, Jung had the strength to resist Chaeha, who tried to jump into the sea to end it all.
With a forceful grip, Jung tied Chaeha to the ground, making sure he couldn’t take a step forward.
Exhaling a helpless sigh, Chaeha mumbled.
ads
“…How did you get here?”
“I followed the Vice President’s car. Please calm down. Nothing will change by doing this!”
“Secretary Jung. How can I endure this any longer? What? Tell me. What meaning is there in living like this?”
When scheming men desperately battle for her favor in the male harem
This one’s also on my reread list! The rivalry, scheming between the men in the imperial harem are just as intense and thrilling as in classic palace drama novels, where concubines fight to the death. Give it a read, girls! I promise you won’t be disappointed.
Synopsis:
“I am not worthy of her… but I still want to be by her side, even if only as a loyal dog…”
Those were the painful whispers of Yue Guanyi – the proud Crown Prince of the Great Qi, who was torn between deep love and a guilty conscience. Despite holding the supreme power of the Imperial Guard, he still could not forget the dark past when he was sold into a brothel.
Fate played a cruel twist when Qiu Shuzhi – a young female official who had just passed the imperial examinations with top honors – stepped into his life. She did not know that she was the one who had saved him from a tragic fate many years ago. And now, her heart was the target of pursuit for both Yue Guanyi and the powerful Empress Dowager Qin Qing.
While Yue Guanyi only dared to silently care for and protect the one he loved from afar, the Empress Dowager Qin Qing openly expressed his feelings and did not hesitate to take advantage of his power to approach Qiu Shuzhi. The covert struggle between the two most powerful forces in the imperial court began…
Trigger warning: All men in this novel are yandere style.
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