All of the man’s actions, no, even his breathing, felt clearly different compared to before.

The eyes that looked at me contained a subtle kindness, and the atmosphere that was like a harsh winter now felt like spring with budding sprouts.

It must be a lie.

Because otherwise, none of this would make sense.

He who gives nothing, yet gives just one handful, must have everything covered in lies.

Just like me, pretending to have something while being a doll molded from emotionless monochrome.

In reality, whether it was a lie or not didn’t matter from the beginning.

I don’t know what whim made him give my mother’s medicine, but only the result matters to me.

However, it was inevitable that I would doubt this situation and the man all day until night came.

To think that what befalls a traitor is not death, nor anything else, but this.

Isn’t it natural to become suspicious of him acting as usual?

The more gentle his touch, the more I felt that way.

No matter who it is, there’s no one who wouldn’t be angry at someone who tried to kill them, or someone who tried to betray them.

Moreover, when that someone is this man.

This man… was someone with the decisiveness to cruelly deal with anything that flew towards him.

At least in all the cases I’ve heard so far, he has done so without exception.

That’s why I was prepared for death when coming here.

I had nothing to say even if he said, “How dare you trick me and crawl back here?”

Yet such a man is acting like nothing happened to me.

Suddenly, such a suspicion arises.

Could it be that the punishment this man intends for me is something like torture of hope?

Is he doing this to exact the cruelest revenge?

He was more than capable of doing so.

Because the person before me is a man who could turn cold at any moment and abandon me without it being strange at all.

The anxiety that was eating away at me stopped expanding when he went outside.

In the end, he didn’t go back on his word.

His attitude didn’t show even a slight change either.

A sense of relief that mixed in arbitrarily over the anxiety wavered confusingly.

As I quietly stared at the door the man had left through, the gentle kiss flashed through my mind.

Even until I reached the dormitory building, the heat that had brushed my lips didn’t fade.

He had always been that way, but this time he was different.

If before it was like something hot colliding in a furnace, this time it was like a warm spring laid over winter.

The more it was like that, the clearer the questions became in my mind.

‘Why did that man…?’

As I stood blankly in the center of a street corner after leaving the building, fallen leaves rustled as they brushed past my feet.

The chilly coldness of the night, different from the day, wrapped around my body, and my belatedly awakened mind saw reality.

Whatever the reason for that man’s change, it’s certain that it’s not because of my usefulness.

That man didn’t even mention that word anymore, as if he didn’t need a witness like me.

I recall the man’s face sneering at the words of being a witness.

And over that, the man who spoke rather heavily about the obvious fact that I would die if I did so, overlaps.

When he said those words, the man seemed somewhat angry.

Even though he’s someone who wouldn’t care even if I disappeared without a trace.

Why did he have such an expression?

Of course, he’s not keeping me off the witness stand for my sake.

I’m not stupid enough to have such a delusion.

He has either already prepared everything to deal with the person called his uncle, or he has concluded that my testimony is of no use.

That means… I must prove my usefulness in the way he wants for the remaining time.

Having to rely on that heart that could change at any time, a feeling of frustration comes over me.

But where else? That such an opportunity has arisen.

For the first time… something that wasn’t the worst unfolded before my eyes.

Whatever intentions the man has, whatever it is, the dice have already been cast.

The man said he would give me another chance, and even if it’s a false opportunity, the fact that I must seize it remains unchanged.

So it was time to look ahead and move forward.

Because the answer is always in front, not behind.

The man’s words about meeting often were not a lie.

Our meetings, which were regular at twice a week, became more frequent and suddenly arranged.

Moreover, the place wasn’t the Marriott.

This man, who had a carriage waiting behind the square, was waiting for me inside it.

That carriage passed through the bustling city center at midday and headed towards some quiet place.

At first, not knowing his intentions, the wavering anxiety blocked my view and I couldn’t properly see the scenery.

I just followed behind him, smiled when he smiled, and did my best to respond, that was all.

He would gaze at me like that for a while, then silently put his coat around me.

Only now, after several such repetitions, can I see the scenery behind the man.

The places he took me to, like today, generally had few people around.

Those busy living their own daily lives didn’t acknowledge us as we passed by.

Behind that was a beautiful landscape spread out over a vast expanse of land.

The spectacular view formed by steep cliffs stretching down, and white houses with red roofs clustered on top…

To the blue sea carrying white foam.

It was a picturesque place that made me doubt if such a place existed within the empire.

I hadn’t seen properly, but all the places I had accompanied him to so far must have been like this.

In such places, he would walk down together without saying much, smile fleetingly, and then hold hands.

As if playing at being lovers.

Today was the same.

It was just another day like the many days we had passed.

For me, it was like a part of my work.

In a situation where I had to focus on him, while holding my breath, occasional uncontrollable worries seeped in.

The medicine issue was anxiously resolved, but numerous unresolved problems still rippled in my mind.

Until this dawn, I had been sending dozens of letters trying to find sponsors for the project and constantly flipping through documents related to them.

Knowing it wouldn’t work, but unable to say it couldn’t be done.

I, who couldn’t submit such reports, continued repeating meaningless actions.

And when I face the man like this, I contemplate thousands of times whether to bring up that story or not.

But as always, those words that climbed up to my throat were never uttered in the end.

It’s not that I hadn’t said such things to him before.

He already knew all about my situation.

I can’t forget the man who asked why I had to do that back then.

And his cold face as he said those words.

If he had intended to help, he would have done so already.

All I could do today was to smile brightly and respond to the man’s words.

“It’s so beautiful. I’ve never seen such scenery before.”

The smiling side of the man’s face came into view.

In that state, the man slowly turned his head towards me.

It’s a smile I’ve never seen before.

A pure white smile. I thought such a thing didn’t suit the man at all, but did he have such an aspect?

“You’re more beautiful.”

“…Pardon?”

“I said you’re more beautiful.”

His face saying those words was perfect like a sculpture, truly unlike a cruel person.

“You must have heard that a lot. Being called beautiful.”

“Well. No one has dared to utter such words in front of me.”

“Ah, I…”

As I hesitated, thinking I might have overstepped, the man’s hand holding mine tightened.

When I looked up, he was looking at me with a smiling face.

“I like that you’re the first.”

“I like it too.”

“What?”

His face changed to be quite mischievous.

Yet his gaze remained persistent, looking at me until he heard the answer. As if there was an answer he wanted.

At times like this, I catch up busily as much as the intensity of the act he’s putting on.

“You.”

A gentle smile was engraved on the face that had become indifferent.

Just like a child experiencing their first love.

It’s ridiculous. There’s no such thing at all. I’m just… a companion to alleviate his boredom, nothing more, nothing less.

But truly, looking at that face, anyone would have such an illusion.

“Do you still think the same now?”

“…”

“The thought of disappearing.”

I couldn’t tell what he was thinking from his indifferent side profile as he spoke.

Whether he wanted me to disappear quickly, or not to disappear.

I gave up trying to interpret his face, which I couldn’t understand even that much.

In reality, the answer isn’t in his face, so why try to judge it so difficultly, I found myself ridiculous.

Still, I was curious for a moment.

Throwing a question at him was a somewhat impulsive decision.

“What do you want me to do?”

His face turned towards me.

My image was fully reflected in his red eyes where the sun was scattering, rippling.

Those eyes narrowed slightly, exuding a unique atmosphere.

“Whatever you want.”