If You Want To Possess Me - Chapter 93

“Well, until recently, Coby was in the same situation as this victim.”

Kisa turned her head and met the eyes of the man leaning obliquely against the sofa.

“It’s fortunate that he met Seierd a little earlier. It may sound a bit strange, but if it weren’t for that, he might have been in danger too.”

“…I see.”

Seierd showed a faint smile as he loosened his slightly stiff lips.

“Kisa, you truly have a sunny disposition. You even worry about Coby.”

Feeling embarrassed, Kisa scratched her cheek.

“What do you mean? He’s your friend, Seierd.”

Although he didn’t give off a very good impression, Kisa’s honest wish was for Coby, as Seierd’s cherished person, to proceed down a good path.

She imagined what Coby might look like now, far away.

Properly atoning for his crimes, rehabilitating, and living diligently without committing any more wrongdoings in the future.

As Kisa expressed those sentiments, Seierd nodded his head leisurely.

“I’m sure he can do that.”

Hearing it from none other than him, Kisa felt an inexplicable conviction.

At that moment, Seierd’s hand cupped Kisa’s chin.

“Kisa.”

Their gazes met, his hand was polite yet gentle, and her name was called in his low-pitched, beautiful voice.

Kisa now knew clearly enough what would come next, even with her eyes closed.

Naturally, their lips overlapped.

It was difficult the first couple of times, but the more they repeated, the more often the two sought each other’s warmth.

Thanks to that, Kisa, who had initially been preoccupied with keeping up with Seierd’s movements, was now able to move somewhat proactively.

To confess, kissing was a much more pleasurable act than Kisa had vaguely imagined.

To the point where she almost regretted not knowing this wonderful thing until now.

Of course, before meeting Seierd, she didn’t mean that she should have kissed Daniel or other men first.

Kisa sincerely thought she was fortunate that Seierd Hillan was her first partner.

Although she couldn’t bring herself to ask, it seemed likely that it was the same for Seierd.

‘He went to the monastery when he was young.’

He had previously affirmed that he did not get close to the opposite sex while staying at the monastery.

Then, Kisa would be his first partner too.

Thinking that way, her heart swelled with happiness, but at the same time, paradoxically, a suspicion like black smoke arose in a corner of her mind.

For that, wasn’t he too skilled at kissing?

‘Skilled… is it right?’

Naturally, as Kisa’s first kiss was with Seierd, she had almost no basis to judge whether he was skilled or not.

She just guessed that since his attitude was more relaxed than hers and she felt this good, he must be skilled.

Perhaps he wasn’t particularly good either.

The reason she felt good might be because the person she was kissing was Seierd.

‘Yes, that must be it.’

Honestly, for Kisa, that was dozens of times better than him having other partners besides her.

Otherwise, she would suffer from burning jealousy.

Definitely more than when she learned of Hazel’s existence.

While she was thinking that way.

With a small groan, Kisa’s mind returned from imagination to reality.

Seierd had lightly bitten the tip of Kisa’s tongue.

It didn’t hurt, but it surprised her a little.

‘Does it mean to focus on the kiss?’

But for some reason, his tongue withdrew obediently.

Kisa looked at the receding lips with slightly longing eyes.

How should she express it, today’s kiss felt lighter and more refreshing than usual.

In the first place, it was thanks to his somewhat loose movements that Kisa could be lost in thought.

“But Kisa.”

Wiping the saliva from the corner of Kisa’s mouth with a gentle touch, he asked.

“Do you perhaps have any worries?”

“Worries?”

“It might be my misconception, but lately, you don’t seem to look well. Are you tired?”

“Ah, I haven’t been sleeping well for the past few days.”

Kisa hurriedly waved her hand, worried that he might be concerned.

“But it’s nothing serious! It’s not even insomnia, and there are times when this happens for no reason. It gets better over time.”

“Is that so? As for having any worries−.”

“No. Absolutely none. In the first place, what do I have to worry about these days? Everything is going smoothly.”

Her external circumstances were like gentle waves, and above all, Kisa and Seierd’s relationship was favorable, to the point where they were happy just by looking at each other.

Therefore, Kisa was currently happy without any worries.

…That’s how it should have been.

Seierd silently gazed at his lover for a moment, then brushed her side hair.

“If that’s the case, I’m glad.”

He didn’t ask the same thing anymore.

Kisa, my lovely daughter. Come here.

The mother who said that with a smile fell into an eternal slumber, unable to endure a particularly cold winter.

She passed away. The red-haired doctor, like blood, declared her death, and the father quietly covered his eyes.

Meow. There was a cat that cried like that.

An annoying cat that filled its stomach with the food Kisa gave each time, but ran away whenever she tried to pet it.

One winter day, that cat no longer avoided Kisa’s touch.

It could no longer avoid it.

Kisa, holding the small, cold body in her arms…

“Young lady!”

Her eyes opened wide at the shout that hit her eardrums.

“Young lady! Are you alright?”

Kisa looked at the person shaking her body with a dazed mind.

“Nanny?”

The nanny with a worried face was looking down at Kisa lying on the bed.

Judging by the darkness except for a single lamp illuminating the room, it seemed to be still in the middle of the night.

Sitting up, she asked the nanny.

“What’s the matter?”

“What’s the matter? You were groaning as if you were having a nightmare, young lady.”

“Me?”

“Yes, it’s a good thing I came to check on you in the middle.”

Occasionally visiting here to check if Kisa was sleeping well was also one of the nanny’s duties.

In fact, not long after the Countess of Vanspelt passed away, she used to sleep in the same bed with young Kisa.

It was because Kisa, who woke up from sleep from time to time, cried out for the deceased Countess.

The nanny, who sat on the bed, asked cautiously.

“Did you have a terrible nightmare?”

“A nightmare.”

For some reason, she didn’t want to talk about the Countess.

The nanny felt very sorry for Kisa, who lost her mother at a young age. While Kisa was honestly grateful for the sentiment, it was sometimes burdensome.

For that reason, Kisa mentioned another being that appeared in her dream besides the Countess.

“I dreamed of Mustachio Jack.”

“Mustachio Jack? Ah, that stray cat?”

Mustachio Jack, a name given because the black pattern located around the nose looked as if it had grown a mustache.

It was the name young Kisa gave to a certain cat that frequented the Vanspelt manor as if it were its own home.

Although she couldn’t keep it because Count Vanspelt did not tolerate animal fur flying around in his mansion, Kisa loved that cat very much.

Jack’s existence was a great comfort to the heart of a girl who had lost her mother.

It was also Mustachio Jack who brought laughter back to Kisa after a long time.

To the point where she volunteered to feed him, a task originally shared by the Vanspelt family’s servants, despite her usual timidity.

However…

“It was really chaotic when that cat died. I was sweating bullets trying to calm you down, young lady. I was so worried you might get dehydrated from crying so much.”

That’s how immense the sense of loss that struck Kisa was the moment Jack drew his last breath.

Exaggerating a bit, it felt like losing her mother twice.

Perhaps because of that, like with the Countess, there were also vague aspects to the memory of Mustachio Jack’s death.

She remembered the cat’s death, but couldn’t clearly remember exactly why it died.

Perhaps erasing memories was young Kisa’s way of escaping when faced with unbearable sadness.

‘I roughly remember what happened after that.’

At that time, the person who first suggested making a grave for Mustachio Jack in the backyard of the manor was Daniel.

As if he had developed an uncharacteristic sympathy, Daniel was particularly attentive to Kisa at that time.

Saying that the Count would surely dislike it if he found out, the boy brought a shovel from somewhere and dug the ground, saying they should secretly make it when the servants were not around.

Come to think of it, that was when Daniel settled into Kisa’s heart.

Jack’s death was the trigger that made her rely too much on Daniel.

The nanny shook her head as if recalling the complicated feelings of that time.

“Moreover, young lady. You went missing then. I thought my heart would drop and I would die.”

But Kisa’s eyes widened at the unexpected word that suddenly popped up.

“What? Missing?”

“Oh my, you don’t remember?”

“Did I really go missing?”

“Yes. One day, you disappeared without a trace, and the mansion was turned upside down. We only found out later that it was because of that cat.”

Even hearing this, she had no recollection at all. It seemed to be a part of the memory that disappeared due to shock.

“Where did I go?”

“Well, I don’t know either. If you don’t remember, only young master Daniel would know.”

“Wait, why is Daniel’s name coming up here?”

“Because you went out with young master Daniel.”

“How did that happen?”

“I don’t know. Your complexion was pale and you just cried, and young master Daniel seemed angry, so he kept his mouth shut, and there was no way to know.”

The nanny tapped her cheek, recalling the past.

“What was it? You encountered a bad guy outside? That’s all you said.”