The sleepless nights did not become easier as time passed.

Ilarid tossed and turned in bed many times. In fact, it was easier not to sleep at all. Nightmares always awaited her when she closed her eyes.

The nightmares always brought the members of the Melpiram family. Her brother whom she met in the prison tower, her mother and father heading to the execution ground, and even all the employees.

Whenever she couldn’t sleep, Ilarid deliberately pictured the targets of her revenge.

Cledius and the noble forces protecting him.

Ilarid’s eyes squeezed shut once and then opened. It was especially difficult to fall asleep tonight.

There were always many reasons for insomnia, but tonight was clear. When dawn breaks, Cledius will head to the battlefield. Without fail, a war to satisfy his greed unfolds.

Every time he went to the battlefield, Ilarid knelt on the bed and prayed. Please let him be defeated. May it become a war that remains a stain on the empire.

But contrary to her prayers, Cledius always entered the imperial palace proudly, sounding the trumpets of victory.

Why are the lifelines of those she wishes dead so long? Ilarid asked, glaring at the sky full of flower decorations and paper firecrackers to celebrate the news of victory.

‘Is it Your will that I kill him with my own hands?’

No answer came from the sky. The cold and beautiful sky, giving neither affirmation nor denial, was especially blue that day.

The sword hilt and trigger were already in her hands. How could she not shoot? For a while, she spent time imagining pointing a sword and gun at Cledius’s heart over and over. But even in her imagination, she could not kill him in the end.

Ilarid put down her weapons and muttered, glaring at Cledius’s apparition.

‘I’ll take away all the imperial power you loved so much, so you can come down miserably.’

Did the imaginary Cledius smile when he heard this?

His desires were always shamelessly naked. Expansion of territory, firmly established power, and Ilarid too.

It was the same with his ruthless use of Selina. He openly embraced his mistress to frustrate Ilarid and see her break down.

‘Perhaps he meant to just use her, but ended up growing fond of her.’

He had intended to use her like a chess piece, but she seemed to fit perfectly in his hand. They suited each other in many ways. May they pour out their desires for each other, not caring about the empress at all.

Ilarid sat up in bed. Burying her head in her raised knees made everything even darker.

In the darkness, the image of one man suddenly appeared. The vague form gradually took shape.

It was clearly Lebel.

“Goodness.”

An exclamation of astonishment burst from her lips. She sprang up reflexively. Why on earth did Lebel come to mind?

Ilarid gently placed her hand near her heart. Perhaps because she was too startled, the thumping sound reverberated throughout her body.

“…I’ve gone mad.”

Her always cold hands were helpful at times like this. Ilarid tried to cool her suddenly flushed cheeks, but she couldn’t easily calm down. She wanted to get some fresh air, if only for a moment.

She immediately got up from the bed and threw open the curtains and window. When had it become dawn? The far side of the sky had started to spread over the night sky, tinged with blue.

The dawn air still held a chill. Ilarid, who had gone out onto the balcony, took a deep breath as she leaned her arms on the railing.

The scent of dew on grass blades and wet earth wafted strongly. The chirping of birds already awake could be heard in the dawn light.

Suddenly, Ilarid felt someone’s familiar gaze. She had met him only a few times, but now it was almost welcome. She bent her waist sideways, trying to find the source of the gaze.

“I know you’re there.”

She couldn’t speak loudly, so she barely managed to whisper while clinging to the railing. But all around was quiet. As if there had never been anyone there from the start.

“I’m telling you, I know…”

Ilarid’s voice lacked some of its earlier certainty. Was it really just her imagination? She had even pictured that man’s face in the darkness, so it was understandable to be mistaken.

As Ilarid was slowly scanning the grass and trees, about to turn back into the bedroom, it happened.

“It seems I can no longer deceive Your Majesty the Empress.”

Startled, she looked down to see Lebel looking up at her. He gave a light bow to the empress. The faint dawn light illuminated his face.

He was smiling.

Unlike his calm smile, his intense gaze pierced through the dim dawn towards Ilarid. She was reminded again of the warmth that had touched her hand. A gentle trembling was felt once more.

It was a gaze she had never received before. A strange look, heated a little more than tenderness. It felt like she might get burned if she just stood still. Ilarid wrapped herself tightly in the shawl over her nightgown.

“Why are you here at this hour…”

“In an hour, I leave the palace.”

“I thought the departure ceremony was in the morning.”

“I received orders to depart first.”

Their voices were quiet but clear in the surrounding silence. Was he part of the advance party, or had he been given some other mission?

Ilarid had no right to ask about the orders. She could only guess it was probably to scout the enemy lines in advance. Or perhaps they had decided to move separately, reluctant to travel together.

“I wanted to see Your Majesty the Empress one last time before leaving.”

“…Don’t say ‘last’.”

Ilarid shook her head and pressed close to the balcony. Any word implying an end was ominous to someone facing war.

“I meant the last for today. It seems I won’t be able to see Your Majesty the Empress for some time.”

Lebel also took a step forward to match Ilarid’s distance. Illuminated by the dawn light, Ilarid shone clearly up there. My person, beautiful even at night. A smile played on Lebel’s lips.

“Why me…”

Ilarid forgot even that her voice was trembling. No, that can’t be. Why me, someone you’ve only just met? For what reason?

“Is a reason necessary?”

Her breath caught. Could blue eyes burn so hotly? Had she ever received such fervent longing in her life? As Ilarid hesitated, unable to find an answer, Lebel continued speaking.

“I will certainly carry out Your Majesty the Empress’s orders.”

Orders? Before she could ask, Lebel had vanished. Ilarid looked around in bewilderment, but it was quiet around the balcony.

The morning of the departure ceremony dawned.

Cledius was already prepared at the imperial palace. Of course, the empress consort stood by his side. Selina’s eyes were red and swollen, as if she had been crying for quite some time.

“Your Majesty the Emperor, you must… return safely.”

“I will endure by thinking of the empress consort in difficult moments.”

It was truly a tearful farewell scene. Selina clutched a handkerchief tightly in her hand. She made quite a show of tears, soaking the handkerchief. Cledius gently comforted Selina.

At a glance it seemed quite romantic, but the gazes of those watching the two were not so kind. It was enough to make onlookers click their tongues at the blatant favoritism shown with the empress right there.

“I wish you good fortune.”

Ilarid offered only a formal greeting, without any other words of comfort or affection. It would be a waste of her tongue and voice to utter such words.

Cledius wore a secretly disappointed expression.

“Empress, isn’t your greeting too curt? Just one word to your spouse departing for perilous lands?”

“I think that’s more than enough.”

Laughter burst from Selina’s lips, unable to hold back, as she clung tightly to Cledius’s side. It was an outrageous situation. Even for a broken relationship, would it hurt to speak a few kind words?

The emperor embraced Selina once and lightly kissed her forehead. He left without leaving any other words for Ilarid.

That was actually more comfortable. It was far more uncomfortable to receive actions and words without sincerity. What if he whispered words of love to Ilarid? At this thought, Ilarid’s stomach churned.

She barely suppressed the nauseous feeling and said to Lynette and the maids:

“How nauseating. Let’s go back.”

All the way back to the empress’s palace, Ilarid thought of Lebel whom she had encountered at dawn.

At least he was favorable towards Ilarid. If he achieved good results in the war and could extend the contract with the imperial family, the situation would tilt a bit in her favor.

What should she do after that? Paying them the contract fee was the first hurdle.

Fortunately, there were the jewels that her mother, Keira Rowen Melpiram, had secretly placed in her hand before Ilarid entered the imperial palace.

‘A woman should have her own money too. So you don’t become shabby. Keep this absolutely secret from Lynette and the imperial family.’

Mother. Did you foresee even this? Ilarid tried to soothe her bitter feelings.

Should she divert funds and launder them cleanly to use without qualms, like Cledius does? Or should she seduce Lebel?

At this thought, a deflated smile leaked out. At the sudden laughter, Lynette and the maids looked at the empress’s expression, but she had already returned to her usual expressionless face.

As for Ilarid, she was hopeless at things like seduction.

During her curious adolescent years as a young girl, her brother Limless was so strict that she had no chance to meet boys her age.

Then she stayed in the mansion receiving education as the crown princess and entered the imperial palace right away. Ilarid herself was curious about the existence of men, but she didn’t act as if it was her whole life.

‘Seduction, as if.’

If she had known such methods, would things have been much easier? As if her chest felt tight, Ilarid’s steps quickened a bit.

As if to match those quickened footsteps, a strong wind suddenly blew. The scarf that had been fluttering unsteadily came loose in the wind and fell to the ground after a few steps.

Unaware that her scarf had fallen, Ilarid walked on quite far ahead.

“Your Majesty the Empress, just a moment.”

At the maids’ call, Ilarid came to her senses, checked her neck, and wore a troubled expression. She covered her neck with one hand and turned back towards the maids. Lynette hurriedly wrapped the scarf around Ilarid’s neck.

The thin scarf tied around her neck had become quite a fashionable trend among the nobles thanks to Ilarid.

Some speculated that she wore the scarf as a sign of mourning for her family. But it was just a guess circulating among people’s rumors. Ilarid didn’t bother to explain the story behind the scarf.

Ilarid carefully removed the hand covering her neck. The diagonal scar on her neck revealed its dark presence. It stood out all the more as the only scar on her clean neck.

Lynette moved her hands as quickly as possible to recreate the original scarf arrangement.

“There, it’s done.”

Though she spoke as brightly as possible, Ilarid’s darkened expression did not easily return. Lynette, who knew the story behind the scar, also walked with her head bowed.

That scar was the price of Lynette’s life.