I Decided to Let You Go - Chapter 32

“If it’s not that… His Excellency wouldn’t mention the Emperor’s visit belatedly.”

It was difficult to understand the man’s attitude expressing anger. As if I looked like someone who would ask such a thing.

Sieghart wondered if perhaps the duchess had tarnished the family’s honor, or if he was concerned that they would retaliate later by worsening relations with the imperial family.

Just like back then when he treated me like someone he would kill because I owed a debt to the imperial family.

“So you’re assuming I wouldn’t have brought this up to you if it wasn’t that.”

“……”

“As anyone in the ducal household would, I know about your relationship with the Emperor. I clearly remember even that scene where you begged me not to get involved with the imperial family.”

But the man burst out in anger, saying he had no intention of blaming such things.

His jet-black bangs were swept back. With his forehead fully exposed and thick eyebrows, the man’s expression became even fiercer. His desolate red eyes, which were almost difficult to meet, also contributed greatly to this.

“But I heard from the butler’s mouth, not yours, that my wife met the Emperor who barged in while I was away. How do you think that makes me feel?”

Due to speaking with his molars clenched, rougher pronunciations than usual leaked from his mouth. Uncharacteristic curses were mixed in here and there.

Though very sorry for him, Natasha did not know the answer.

What kind of feeling?

Was there any feeling for him to have?

Originally, didn’t he not care whether Natasha met Kyle or not?

Is there a reason to be angry in this situation now, or any emotion to gain?

To emphasize once again, Natasha simply could not understand the man who was angry at her.

It was just when she had been keeping quiet, thinking showing signs of not knowing would only incite more anger. Unable to bear the silence, he finally opened his mouth.

“…I apologize.”

It was a voice dripping with agony.

Even until then, Natasha had not accurately gauged what the man was apologizing for. She only guessed that he was apologizing for not controlling his emotions and getting angry at her.

“I apologize for not keeping my promise, and for leaving you alone.”

Her pupils briefly contracted then dilated greatly as she watched the man clarify the meaning of his apology.

Is the power of the contract so great?

Come to think of it, it’s natural that he couldn’t protect Natasha since he was on a business trip. It was surprising that he was taking a humble attitude even though Natasha hadn’t reproached him first.

Her lips, which had been moving to answer, curled back inside. Natasha chose silence, feeling like her voice would come out unattractively cracked.

It felt strange.

It was something made up of complex emotions that she dared not describe.

Natasha’s harsh treatment of the Emperor was not just because he was her family’s enemy. While she was similarly hung up on the past, it was precisely to prevent repeating past events.

To avoid becoming Kyle Letius’s dog.

That day’s rudeness was both an act of rebellion and a hint that Natasha would not be easily swayed by the man.

But the Kyle she knew was not someone who would stand idly by after suffering such humiliation.

‘He’ll come back again, huh.’

Her brow furrowed briefly as she recalled Kyle’s parting words.

‘His pride must be hurt, so he probably won’t actually come first, but plans to make me come to the imperial palace.’

Then Natasha thought of what would happen next.

‘Who would have thought the noble duchess would enter the beast’s den first?’

The unsavory incident on the day of the duke’s knighting ceremony as an honorary knight.

That day, Cayena was imprisoned in the imperial underground prison on suspicion of poisoning, and Natasha jumped into the beast’s den herself to save her.

Kyle was probably planning that incident again this time.

‘I’m sorry, Emperor. But I won’t go through that again. Never.’

Natasha resolved to escape misfortune by using the secret of the world that only she knew.

Her determined red eyes gleamed ominously.

The shocking news released by the empire’s top newspaper, Daily Beacon, struck the empire. As a result, everyone, regardless of gender, status, or age, was talking about the same thing.

It all started when Sieghart Asthart was selected as the honorary knight chosen each century.

It was because for the first time, a position that had belonged to the imperial families of other great powers, or the Letius imperial family, was transferred elsewhere.

When the article was announced, a celebratory party was held at the ducal residence. Since hosting banquets was prohibited until the coronation ceremony, they enjoyed a pleasant time holding a small dinner party with members of the ducal family.

The banquet was enjoyable.

The dinner menu that appropriately mixed Natasha and Sieghart’s tastes, the low-alcohol champagne prepared for her who wasn’t good with alcohol, the waltz music that continued throughout the banquet, everything evoked emotions.

Natasha, who had sneaked out in the early morning, was catching the night breeze to calm her alcohol-induced excitement. As if God also knew of today’s joy, the wind was gently soft, unlike winter.

Soon after, there was a presence behind her. Meliana and Vanessa, who approached with quick steps, then spoke to her, asking what she was thinking. It seemed she looked as if she was contemplating something as she sat blankly staring at the night sky.

“Just, I was recalling my time at the ducal residence.”

Natasha answered with a faint smile.

It had already been a month since she stayed at the ducal residence.

Around this time, she was thoroughly alienated in the ducal residence. The mansion was quiet to the point of loneliness, and the members of the mansion treated her as if she didn’t exist, isolating her. What welcomed her, with only her body remaining, was a painfully sharp loneliness.

Quite different from now.

At least she was respected as the duchess within the mansion.

The duchess’s duties, which were difficult to learn at first, were now handled well enough to occasionally receive praise from the assistant.

She had become quite close with the ducal family’s knights, with whom she barely had any acquaintance before, and now she even managed their training every week. She also maintained a fairly good relationship with the head maid, and secretly agreed to attend the maid hiring interview in a few days.

Not only that, she was one step closer to entering high society, which she couldn’t achieve even in her dreams in her past life. The butler informed her that they would put full effort into the duchess’s entry into high society after the coronation ceremony.

Natasha had been practicing hard for the things needed for the events that would take place then. Even at today’s banquet, Natasha learned the dance that was currently popular in the empire.

Though she never wanted it otherwise, Sieghart’s false affection continued, balancing everything.

They were truly precious things. Things she once cried out wanting to have.

“It’s been fairly peaceful days.”

“My lady! You’re being sentimental sometimes, I swear.”

Meliana and Vanessa giggled as if the duchess was cute.

“I’m always grateful to you two as well.”

“What? Us?”

They opened their eyes wide like rabbits, surprised by the duchess’s sudden words. They pointed at their own faces with their fingers, asking if they had heard correctly.

“Thanks to you, I was able to adapt quickly to the ducal residence. When I could have been swayed emotionally by witnessing unpleasant events, you two stayed by my side throughout, keeping me company.”

It wasn’t just that.

The secretly circulating public opinion towards the duchess was unexpectedly favorable. It was thanks to the rumors spread through the mouths of the servants in the ducal family that helped establish a positive position.

Meliana and Vanessa must have had a large share in that, so it was necessary to express gratitude to them at this point to maintain an even better relationship in the future.

“W-we just did our job diligently… But we’re truly honored that you think of us that way. I’m always grateful to you too, my lady. You’re the first person to treat us so kindly.”

“Please continue to take good care of us.”

Their white faces immediately turned red, seemingly embarrassed by Natasha expressing her thanks as if they were great benefactors.

The three people who unintentionally shared their true feelings rejoiced, feeling strangely closer to each other. They continued to chat more while feeling the night breeze, when suddenly…

Natasha, recalling her plan, asked them a question. While building friendships with them was certainly a good thing, she had more important matters left to attend to. No more time could be wasted.

“Oh, by the way, do you know where Cayena is now? I can’t seem to find her anywhere.”

“Lady Ten was also busily moving around looking for you, my lady… Shouldn’t she be around here somewhere?”

Natasha had to meet Cayena before today passed.

Natasha bid them goodnight with thanks and set off to find Cayena.

Cayena was closer than expected. As if the other was also looking for Natasha, the two who met in the middle of the corridor simultaneously welcomed each other.

“Cayena!”

“Oh my, my lady. Where did you go? I thought you had collapsed, unable to even stand due to intoxication.”

Cayena escorted her, saying she would take her to her room. As they walked down the quiet corridor, exchanging impressions of today’s banquet, they stopped in front of a large door.

“Um, Cayena. I have something I want to say.”

Now it had to be done.

Not just for Natasha’s sake. Because innocent Cayena was also a victim of the tragedy.

Natasha opened her mouth quickly, as if she had made up her mind.

“So… um, are you planning to attend this coronation ceremony too?”

“Of course, the maids of the Asthart family must attend. I heard we’ll be managing the holy water and chalice along with the priests that day.”

Her green eyes shone brightly with anticipation. The joy was prominent in her voice as she explained the upcoming event.

On the contrary, Natasha’s lips only grew drier. That was because what she had to propose would shatter such expectations of Cayena.

After that, Natasha opened her mouth with great difficulty.