Those who have received their death date have an endless list of things they want to eat and do. But for Helena, there was only one thing.

To have a small, modest house of her own in Praeterita.

That village held the graves of Basil and her mother. It was a nostalgic and dear hometown. Being near the cemetery, it wouldn’t cost much to build a warm log cabin.

Once the house was completed, she would place a soft and cozy single-person sofa and a table with a white lace cover by the window.

She would fill the shelves with honey and various jams, and oh, she almost forgot the clinking wooden tableware. Should she store fruits in glass bowls rather than wooden baskets?

She would buy ingredients from the small but generous grocery store and butcher shop to cook meals. And like a gravedigger, she would visit the graves daily to pull weeds and catch bugs.

That’s what she wanted to do right away, putting aside her title as Grand Duchess. Instead of allocating funds for her mother-in-law’s banquets, she calculated what to fill her own house with.

As she did so, Helena set out on the journey to Hyre, where the Owen mansion was located. Before going to Praeterita, she intended to collect Basil and her mother’s remaining belongings from the Owen family. And gather funds to build the house.

“Hey there, pretty lady! These just came in this morning, so they’re very fresh! Come take a look!”

“If you don’t buy now, you’ll miss out!”

“Come on, lower the price a bit more!”

The journey was chaotic. Everywhere was filled with a clamor unimaginable in Evergail.

Helena explored wherever her feet took her and chose clothes wherever her eyes landed. Stopping in front of a passing shop window, she saw a reflection of a woman as shabby as a country mouse.

Suddenly, she realized that living carelessly was much harder than she thought. At least for someone who had lived calculating every small action for others.

A baby elephant tied to a stake cannot pull it out even when fully grown. For Helena, regression was like that.

Not a new opportunity for enlightenment, but shackles that gradually conform and break through repeated failures.

She couldn’t be the protagonist in stories who boldly shakes off everything and stands up.

Perhaps a very ordinary supporting role that needs constant effort, at best. The price of voluntarily stepping down from the stage was high.

‘He’s gone now. I abandoned him. I left.’

Already ruminating for the thirteenth time, Helena habitually untied the thin string that had tied her hair. There was no need to be neat anymore.

People couldn’t change suddenly. Even after leaving Eugene, she was still, rather even more, an insignificant Helena.

So she kept repeating to herself as if brainwashing:

‘I’m not lonely. I don’t feel empty.’

Even this was so calculating that it left a slightly bitter taste in her mouth. Reminded of her mother-in-law’s reproach for this trait she disliked, she had to bite her lip.

⌜Men don’t water wilted flowers, Helena. It’s hard to even look at you like a pile of dry firewood, unable to quietly kindle a fire.⌟

At the time, she was busy swallowing the tears that threatened to fall, but there was no lie to discern.

After all, wasn’t it because she lacked the courage to discern that she didn’t come this far?

So Helena deliberately did things that a noble Grand Duchess would never do.

She forced herself to laugh at street performers, ate food sold on stalls, and even slept in a corner of a shabby stable.

Unlike the worries she had before leaving the mansion.

Unlike those worries.

‘I’m not lonely.’

It was fun.

It had to be.

She repeated habitually.

Whether she lived or endured, time passed faster than she thought, without even knowing herself.

The carriage body swayed up and down to the rhythm of clattering hooves. Inside, Helena placed her hand over her hungry stomach. Surely her hand should be warm with human body heat. But it was cold.

Treacherously, the bottom showed easily, and she keenly felt starved for everything.

She thought she should have brought some money from the Grand Duke’s residence. But that thought was quickly erased from her mind.

‘Even if it’s a struggle, it can’t be helped. If I can’t deceive myself, I mustn’t leave any room.’

From the moment she left, she neither expected nor hoped her life would become rainbow-colored. If she had, she wouldn’t have rushed out like this.

She just wanted to finally deny the shelter that had become her skin. Even if it meant bleeding vividly, she had to peel it off.

‘And even then, I…’

Deliberately ignoring her hungry side and insides, she turned her head to the side. Dark green vegetation brushed past the edges of her vision.

It had been a full five days of changing carriages and traveling, as they were quite far from their destination.

Soon she would meet her family, though it might be a bit awkward.

‘They’re not exactly affectionate towards me.’

Her mother, the only one on her side, died after giving birth to her younger sibling, and her father brought in a new woman before the soil on her mother’s grave had even dried.

The older brother who came with her new mother constantly tried to lay unwelcome hands on her until she left for Evergail.

They were people who, blinded by money, married her off like selling livestock. Still…

“They’re family, after all.”

“Pardon?”

The coachman sitting next to her asked, perhaps hearing her mutter to herself. His eyes, lined with fine wrinkles, were wide open.

It had already been half a day since they boarded the final carriage.

He seemed surprised by the first break in silence after maintaining it throughout the journey. Helena shook her head, erasing the bitter expression.

“It’s nothing.”

Fortunately, the coachman didn’t inquire further. As she wasn’t in the mood for pleasant conversation, it was a satisfactory companion for her.

The rattling carriage was now approaching its destination. The coachman lightly started a conversation while gradually slowing the horse’s pace.

“So what brings you here? Seems like you’ve come quite a long way.”

“…My family lives here.”

“It’s been a while since you’ve seen them, eh? How many years has it been?”

“…Yes. I haven’t visited since attending my younger sibling’s funeral.”

“Oh my. Still, it must be nice to see your family’s faces after so long.”

Helena pressed her lips tightly. This time she didn’t answer. It was a conversation she couldn’t continue.

She closed her eyes again and leaned back against the hard wooden board. Until they arrived and she paid the fare, Helena spent her time like that.

As she got off the carriage and slowly entered the village outskirts, the coachman waved to her.

“Have a good time with your family, pretty lady!”

He was exceedingly kind. However, Helena couldn’t even receive that encouragement happily. Only a bitter smile lingered on her lips.

‘A good time with family.’

Could there be a sentence that felt more out of place? It felt as if thorns had grown in her ears that ate the sentence.

Helena stood still until she could no longer hear the sound of hooves hitting the gravel road. Everything around her felt unfamiliar.

The wind tousling her hair,

The underbrush touching her ankles,

The bright sun,

The weight of the luggage bag in her hand.

Every object and sensation in the world seemed to weigh her down. It felt as if the silent ground might flip over and swallow her at any moment.

The court physician at the Grand Duke’s residence told her to take deep breaths and clear her mind as much as possible when such thoughts came, but it wasn’t as easy as it sounded.

Helena remained rooted to the spot for a while, like a tree that had taken root. The first step forward was difficult.

‘It’s okay, there’s nothing to be nervous about.’

How nice it would be if emotions could be cut away as easily as useless hair.

Despite her resolve not to expect anything, there was still a part of her that longed for affection. It made her a little sad.

Tebe, the capital of the Western Continent’s Lihart Empire.

In the imperial palace at its heart, there was one room where the lights didn’t go out even at this late hour.

A voice, more solemn than usual, filled the spacious room as if it would overflow.

“Dion. I believe I’ve finished everything I needed to do.”

The person whose name was called instinctively shrank back. Looking at the owner of the voice, he saw one eyebrow slightly raised. A justified sense of foreboding grew.

Whenever he looked at him like that, it always led to situations where he had to search for blood pressure medication.

‘What on earth is he planning to do? He’s been working non-stop lately, not even sleeping…’

Dion answered while imagining putting that eyebrow back in its place.

“You have indeed completed all essential schedules, but we must not neglect preparations for next month’s trade and exchange meeting with the Kingdom of Usten. Especially since the Crown Prince will be attending this delegation, we need to pay even more attention—”

“I’ve paid plenty of attention and finished it.”

“The recommendation for the imperial personnel—”

“I’ve seen it. I’ve organized and passed it on to the administration department, so you can check it later.”

“The newly revised tax law bill—”

“Hey.”

The man tilted his chin without even giving him a chance to finish speaking.

Dion’s gaze followed its direction. A pile of documents, stacked like an impregnable tower, immediately filled his vision.

Normally, he would have carefully reviewed any documents that came his way, checking if anything was missing or if they were properly approved. However, Dion didn’t bother to sift through the pile of documents.

Although his monarch often displayed incomprehensible eccentricities, he was not one to do work sloppily. In fact, due to his tendency to see things through to the end, Dion often found himself more exhausted.

That was why serving a competent monarch with limited interests was such a headache.

Remembering something, Dion brought up a new agenda.

“Then perhaps we could narrow down some candidates for the Empress at this opportunity… You’ve been saying you’ll handle it yourself every time, but it’s been two years without progress. We need to ignite the competition for candidates and hold the national wedding before it’s too late.”

“Yes, that’s a good idea.”

“No matter how much you delay, you can’t put it off any longer… What? W-what did you just say?”

“I said that’s a good idea.”

Dion’s drowsy eyes flew wide open. Why is he approving so easily all of a sudden?

He had been immovable even under the pressure from ministers all this time. Whenever they managed to push even a list of candidates, he would refuse as if it were a poisoned cup.

Dion excitedly rattled off.

“Then I’ll prepare the list right away…!”

“I need to go on a trip.”

Dion’s face, which had lit up with joy, darkened in less than a few seconds. His sense of foreboding never failed him.

‘Better dead than sick.’

Though inwardly exasperated, all he could do was bite his lip. The man before him was in a position where one couldn’t carelessly show disloyalty.

The ruler of the Lihart Empire. The moon that brought daylight by overthrowing tyranny.

Ian Camel Aksen Fevernheim.