Ian gathered the paper bags in his right hand and slowly extended his empty left hand. He gently brushed over the small scar on Helena’s forehead.

As if he himself felt the pain, as if the scar, which was merely a fully healed wound, was still bleeding vividly. Despite bearing countless scars on his back, he did not stop his hand that moved as if wiping away blood.

“It doesn’t matter. Even if I remain just a stray cat to whom you once threw bread, the space you occupy in my life remains unchanged.”

Helena thought it was a frustrating statement.

Their significance to each other was too different; they could never be of the same weight.

‘How can he harbor such feelings for someone he doesn’t even remember?’

Dark clouds had already rolled overhead. Raindrops began to fall, but Helena stood still, her thoughts as unpredictable as the weather here.

“It’s true that I’m grateful to you. I believe you want me to live. Whether it’s charity, a sense of morality, or something stemming from a past I don’t remember, I can accept it as genuine.”

Helena placed her hand over Ian’s on her scar and then pulled it down.

“But if that’s the case, you’re wealthy, aren’t you? Whether it’s stolen or rightfully yours, you have a lot, don’t you?”

Helena intended to release their overlapped hands, but Ian withdrew his thumb and pressed it firmly on her hand, holding it again. Raindrops trickled through the warmth of their hands.

Helena asked, her voice firm, “Why go through all this trouble instead of just hiring someone to take me to a convent or something?”

“It’s just that I’ve chosen to spend my time on something more valuable.”

“Why do I fall within your range of precious things?”

“Is there any reason why you shouldn’t?”

The next moment, the pressure on Helena’s hand disappeared. Her hand finally dropped.

Helena assumed it was due to the increasingly heavy raindrops. He hadn’t let go; her hand had just slipped away.

‘Ah.’

That realization made her freeze. That’s why she couldn’t continue to be by this man’s side.

If she never hoped for anything, there would be no disappointment. If she never allowed closeness, there would be no sense of loss.

“I thought you wouldn’t understand me, but it turns out I don’t understand you either. What exactly do you want with me?”

“You don’t need to do anything.”

“Then what are you going to do alone?”

“Don’t be too caught up in the relationship. I don’t mind if our relationship isn’t symmetrical. Just knowing that someone is there on the other side is enough for some people.”

Suddenly, a downpour started. Though it was a brief shower, they couldn’t continue walking in such rain. Helena and Ian stopped their conversation and took shelter under the awning of a nearby store.

After shaking off the water from his hair, Ian looked up at the sky. Helena’s gaze followed his to the heavens.

It was an odd sight. On one side, the red sunset was fading, while right above them, it seemed as if the sky had opened up, pouring rain relentlessly.
Helena looked at the puddles forming and soaking the parched ground from the recent rain and spoke.

“You still haven’t properly answered me. What exactly do you want to do alone?”

Ian turned his head towards her. Helena faced him as well.

Despite the weather making everything appear gray, he seemed strangely pristine, a clear shade of silver.

He answered with such a face, in such a voice.

“I want to drench you.”

“……?”

“Like being submerged in the sea, even though you’re breathing. Thoroughly soaked.”

Then, he turned his head away again.

“…….?”

“…….?”

The rain had become a drizzle.

It seemed it would stop completely if they waited a bit longer. During that time, neither of them spoke.

The silence had become natural.

But independently of that, the fact that Helena didn’t need to try to elicit a response from someone or fill the silence felt a bit awkward to her.

“The rain has stopped.”

Ian was the first to break the silence a few minutes later. Stepping out from under the awning, he extended his hand towards Helena.

“Shall we go now?”

Helena looked alternately at his hand and at him, then let out a resigned sigh.

Insisting on parting ways here and standing her ground would only result in being treated like a sack of potatoes again.

“So, I have to sleep with you again today? And probably tomorrow and the day after too?”

“……It sounds strange when you put it that way.”

“Then can we part ways?”

“No. Let’s go together.”

Ian extended his hand a bit more urgently, inviting her to join him. Reluctantly, Helena placed her hand in his.

Ian led her gently with a small smile, and soon the sound of their footsteps on the wet gravel path followed quietly.

Helena suddenly remembered the night he had searched for her. Like then, she gazed blankly at their interlocked hands.

His hand, hiding hers, was covered in scars, barely visible.

‘To let go or not.’

This time, she didn’t ponder for long. His hand wasn’t as warm as before due to the cold rain, but somehow, it felt like she could keep holding it.