Pale and slender fingers glided over the wound on His Grace’s cheek.
“Hoo. Hoo. Hoo.”
Shavell puckered his lips and blew on the wound.
“Shavell was so worried, Your Highness darling.”
Smack. Smack. Smack.
Shavell’s pointed lips busily pecked the duke’s cheek along the lengthy cut.
Hmm… Somehow I became embarrassed, averting my gaze to the ceiling and taking a step back, clasping my hands behind me absentmindedly.
I should quickly ask what I’m curious about and take my leave.
“Your Highness. Earlier with the emperor, what-”
“Lady, you were still here? This must be awkward for you too in this situation?”
Shavell swiftly climbed onto His Grace’s lap, worrying about my predicament, wrapping his slender arms around the duke’s firm neck and planting a kiss on his furrowed brow.
His violet eyes were full of mischief. It must be my imagination that Shavell seemed to be teasing not me, but His Grace.
“Shavell.”
His Grace called to his lover as if groaning.
His Grace truly seemed to find this position awkward. From his collarbone to under his chin was flushed red.
Would a beauty so blindingly enchanting be helpful or harmful to His Grace in his condition?
What did that roughly heaving chest signify?
Was it a healthy physical reaction like an excited bull snorting and stomping its hooves before a real fight?
Could there be a problem caused by the wound Justin inflicted on His Grace’s cheek?
Although Leo said the cut wasn’t deep and the blade didn’t seem to be poisoned. Who knows what that sinister man did.
I’d like to fully undress him and palpate directly.
But if I tell Shavell to move, he’ll probably grab my hair and attack me again, so I decided to just examine closely with my eyes.
Hmm. His face is very flushed but his skin is lustrous and smooth. His skin isn’t dry or damp, so his lungs pass.
The blush on his cheeks is severe, but that seems to be from Shavell constantly fidgeting and stimulating him on his lap, so that passes too.
The twitching broad and taut body is also a natural reaction as he’s holding the empire’s greatest beauty. He looks so firm and sturdy a blade would bounce off. Pass.
No eyelid tremors either. His gem-like pretty blue eyes are slightly bloodshot but the sclera is clean and the iris rims are distinct, so this also passes.
His tightly closed lips are lively and moist. Pass.
‘Ah. Did I stare too much?’
His Grace glanced at me and rolled his eyes, then gently lifted Shavell and set him down at the end of the sofa.
Is he bothered by the thoughtless remark I made before?
[This is a big problem. The wedding is the day after tomorrow and the first night must be consummated. With the groom’s body so frail-]I don’t understand men’s hearts well – I can’t understand women’s hearts either having never lived as one – but he must have been very shocked.
He must have been quite worried if he could continue having passionate nights with such a beautiful wife without straining his health.
Often, worries of the heart lead to illnesses of the body. As his dedicated physician, I can’t let him keep agonizing.
“Your Highness! Please don’t worry, I think it will be fine for you to continue as usual with Shavell.”
I assured His Grace, putting strength into my voice. The conviction of a doctor cleanses away a patient’s anxiety.
“Continue what? What am I to continue?”
“They say a happy married life helps one’s health. As long as it’s not excessive, it’s fine!”
At my words, His Grace’s expression turned fierce, his brows twitching.
What? He doesn’t look reassured at all.
“Please erase my thoughtless remark completely from your mind. Your Highness is absolutely not frail!”
“Lady. They say even if your mouth is crooked, your words should be straight. Such nonsense flows easily from that small mouth of yours.”
His Grace raised a clenched fist and spoke, unfurling his thumb.
“First! How can you who has never even diagnosed me declare whether I’m frail or not? Even a quack wouldn’t be as negligent as you.”
“No, I-”
“Second!”
Without waiting for my explanation, His Grace’s index finger unfurled.
“How can I erase a thoughtless remark I’ve already heard from my mind? Should I crack my head open?”
“Pardon? Uh… I apologize.”
“It’s because of people like you who blurt out words straight from your mouth without going through your brain that the saying ‘a wicked three-inch tongue can kill’ was coined. I wish you’d be aware of that.”
Extending his middle finger next, he glared at me as if he would devour me.
“Third! Did you say married life? Shavell is not my wife. The one spouting thoughtless remarks at me right now is the one who will become my wife starting tomorrow.”
“I was just worried Your Highness would needlessly fret…”
“Don’t worry.”
Shavell plopped himself back onto His Grace’s lap, wrapping his slender arms around the duke’s waist, sturdy like a temple pillar, and looked at me askance.
“Our darling duke is a beast who knows no end once he starts something, whatever it may be. He absolutely never tires. The hooting of owls late at night and the first birdsong heralding morning mean nothing to our beastly duke. Ohoho.”
Shavell demonstratively unbuttoned His Grace’s dress shirt one by one, planting a smacking kiss on the duke’s ear as if to show me.
“Shaveeell-”
His Grace growled at Shavell, his face turning red like a volcano about to erupt.
‘Oh. Is it time for the beast to emerge?’
I quickly covered my face tightly with both hands and swiftly exited His Grace’s bedchamber.
*
“Haha. Ahaha. Puhaha. Ah, my stomach.”
Shavell lifted his trailing dress and burst out laughing, clutching his stomach.
“How did you come to be so misunderstood. Haha. Does it bother you that much?”
But the culprit who made the two lofty Della Ponti brothers clutch their stomachs on the same day looked not at all in a laughing mood.
“Brother. Did you see Lady Yuriella’s expression earlier? Scrunching her freckled nose bridge and rolling her eyes, doesn’t she resemble a rabbit? Her ruby-like sparkling eyes, I wanted to capture and cage her, that’s how cute she was.”
My tactless cousin couldn’t stop laughing.
Should I kick him out? Frosty eyes narrowed. Or.
“Did you say I was a beast who knows no end once I start something?”
Frost bit out the words as if chewing them.
“If you knew what I’ll be doing all night with you, not caring about owls hooting or the first morning birds singing, you wouldn’t be laughing like that, would you?”
Shavell flinched. He quickly straightened his back and wiped the tears gathered at the corners of his eyes.
“I apologize… It’s been so long since I’ve laughed like this… Laughter brings fortune, health… And vitality is national power…”
“You’re quite right. Vitality is national power. Trying to shoulder the empire on those slender shoulders, your waist would buckle, no? Then what’s the answer?”
“Pardon?”
Shavell seemed to know what was coming next, so he tried to escape, pushing his bottom back. But.
“Get up. It’s time we resume the physical training I postponed due to my injury.”
“The wedding is tomorrow. If you save your strength for the wedding night-”
“You need not worry about my wedding night.”
“Still… You shouldn’t disappoint the lady on the first night…”
“There will be no first night.”
“There is though.”
“You know it’s just a formality-”
“It’s not? Oh! Could it be you didn’t know?”
Shavell opened his pretty violet eyes wide. He saw the perfect chance to escape hellish training.
“Duke Grande consulted with the temple and they even sent the consummation time, you know.”
“Hmph. Whether they set a time or not, what does that-”
“The priestesses will also attend to witness the consummation.”
“…What?”
Frost’s eyes grew wide.
“You didn’t read all the documents Duke Grande sent! I thought you knew too.”
I didn’t know.
I didn’t know because I was busy. With the emperor declaring he would attend the wedding uninvited, I was endlessly occupied preparing for potential disputes by disciplining the lords and deploying my private army and military forces.
I thought it was just a pro forma ceremony so I only skimmed the important parts about the iron ore mines, estates, private soldiers, etc. from the marriage-related documents the duke sent. I never imagined this kind of trap was hidden there.
“You can’t avoid the consummation. You can’t just hold hands and sleep.”
“…That doesn’t make any sense…!”
The custom of witnessing the wedding night passed down in the Duchy of Ielheim disappeared generations ago. So I never thought the duke would bring that up.
Damn it.
Why did I utterly forget to be wary of the duke’s desire to obtain Ielheim’s bloodline through his daughter?
“If you’re worried about the consummation, may I offer some advice?”
Shavell approached Frost and caressed the duke’s jawline with a gentle touch.
“Everyone says a man’s strength is power, but that’s not true at all. Since I’ve lived as a woman for 3 years, I’ve come to understand a woman’s heart a bit. The way to make the bride happy is-. Ack!”
Shavell’s wrist was sharply twisted and his deep pink dress flipped inside out. Frost climbed on top of Shavell who was lying on the floor.
“Shall we just do the physical training here?”
Just then, the door burst open and Yuriella ran in.
“Your Grace! Did you know the priestesses will attend the consum-”
Yuriella saw the two people stacked on top of each other on the floor and quickly raised both hands to cover her eyes.
“Ah… I apologize! I didn’t see anything. Really.”
The bedchamber door slammed shut behind Frost, who had frozen as stiff as ice.
Yuriella left the corridor, banging her own head with her fists.
She had rushed over, shocked to hear from the head maid that Duke Grande had arranged for priestesses to attend the consummation.
In the short time it took her to just go to the landing and return, to think they would be so passionately making love.
Our duke really is a beast.
But he mustn’t overexert himself. Yuriella shrugged her shoulders and went to find the head butler.
Though the duke is the leader of the North, the real power moving His Grace is the head butler. Alexis will surely know a way to safely avoid the consummation witnessing.
Yuriella glanced back at His Grace’s bedchamber and smiled slightly.
She had been worried all this time. But with a virile beast like him, she doesn’t need to worry anymore, right?
Yuriella sighed in relief.
Her chest still stung, so she decided to skip dinner tonight.
*
– Solas! You’re the best! Frost! So cool! Solas! So, so, so!
The yellow parrot could no longer chant the spell to summon delicious treats.
Alexis locked Wren in his cage and put it in the small storage attached to his room so no sound would escape.
“The consummation witnessing, you say?”
“Why the hell are they doing that?”
“For the sake of an heir. To preemptively quash any disputes about the legitimacy the lord of the North must have.”
“Is there no way to avoid it?”
“Better to make a request to His Excellency the duke. His Excellency made a dizzying donation to the temple he commissioned for this consummation. It seems to be an act conscious of Lord Shavell.”
Damn. So Duke Grande even spread bribes.
Well. It’s not incomprehensible. With blindingly beautiful Shavell under the same roof, he must have worried I would become a neglected leftover.
“I apologize. Our duke is truly impeccable in all other aspects.”
Alexis sighed deeply.
“I just don’t understand why he keeps Lord Shavell in the house. I dare not even mention it to the lady for her understanding.”
The head butler seemed frustrated, loosening his cravat and drooping his shoulders.
“Oh! That cravat!”
“Yes. It’s the cravat His Grace tied on the lady’s wound.”
“It suits you well.”
“It’s made from the finest silk thread spun by silkworms the textile artisan invited from the Eastern Continent raised.”
“No wonder. He wouldn’t want to give it away.”
“He didn’t give it, he discarded it. I picked it up. Did you dislike it that much?”
“No. It was pretty. It was nice. But…”
“But?”
“…it reminded me. That bastard.”
“…Bastard?”
“The day I returned after being badly beaten up outside. He applied medicine to my wounds and untied his cravat to wrap my foot. That noble person, kneeling on one knee… just as His Grace did today.”
“That sounds like a good man though?”
“I got majorly backstabbed.”
“You still can’t forget it?”
“I’ll never forget even if I die and come back to life.”
“Was he someone you can’t forget like that?”
“I mustn’t forget. Damn guy keeps appearing in front of my eyes too.”
Appear in front of my eyes? The duke’s cheek was wounded. But why did he do that? He wasn’t that stupid of a guy.
Lost in thought, I didn’t see the head butler’s eyes narrowing.
The words I spoke – ‘bastard,’ ‘can’t forget,’ ‘appears in front of my eyes’ – translated in the head butler’s mind to ‘the ringleader who will make our duke a laughingstock.’
I also had no idea his head was starting to spin quickly to find this ringleader.
Before the first bird of morning sang, a detailed report from the head butler about the personal information of potential ringleaders was placed on the duke’s office desk. That too I could never have imagined.
[Touch the gear icon in the bottom right corner of the screen to move to the next chapter if you want.]
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Daily Life of a Scumbag Man Giving Birth (Female-dominant)
One-line summary: The way for a promiscuous scumbag man to atone for his sins is to let him get… pregnant.
Synopsis:
Meng Huan, a scumbag who has dated countless girlfriends, scammed countless women, transmigrates to a female-dominated country.
Day 1: Whether it’s female dominance or not doesn’t matter. The beauties here are passionate and amorous. Isn’t it easier to scam them than in modern times?
Day 2: After a night, Meng Huan discovers the differences in the female-dominated world. Men here actually have chastity locks and menstrual cycles. This hinders his ability to perform, damn it!
Day 3: What’s wrong with sleeping around? I don’t want you to marry me. I’m meant to be a playboy. I don’t care about male virtues… What? You want to drown me in a pig cage? Marry, I’ll marry!
Day N: Meng Huan inexplicably vomits and receives the shocking news of his life… He’s pregnant.