As Hayden wiped away the tears falling from Rue’s shocked eyes, he bowed his head.

“I didn’t want to say it. I thought it would be disgusting.”

The scene shown must have been extremely shocking. However, he wished she wouldn’t think of it as a monster. He would rather she considered it pitiful. It would be better if she didn’t find it repulsive that he had survived in this place for such a long time, matching the age difference.

“I’ve been thinking about you without your permission. Enduring on my own, as if you were with me.”

But he said it. He had no choice but to say it. Hayden mumbled as he looked at the only person he had been terribly afraid of encountering here, fearing she might come here before escaping beyond the barrier.

“In fact, it’s something you don’t need to know, and it’s not even about holding onto a very sick person and coming here.”

What’s the point of confronting a sick person? Why get angry? Let it go. Turning away has not been once or twice.

“But you’re too clumsy about me.”

With a suppressed voice, a bright light enveloped Rue. His power was now protecting her, making her not feel any pain or discomfort even if she moved. It was something Hayden could do without even touching her.

“Then when I said, ‘What if I get tired of being with you last time?’ Did that mean I thought I would get tired of it?”

His questioning tone was straightforward.

“I thought you meant I would get tired of you, but as I kept thinking, it wasn’t like that.”

Constantly apologizing and apologizing for fearing that Carlos would take away his power, the woman who still worried about it did not seem to exist.

Looking at the sleeping Rue, Hayden reached a conclusion. The one who said she would get tired of this relationship was not her but him.

“I thought I grabbed your ankle and seemed like trash to throw away because I got tired first.”

Before the startled Rue could say anything, he spoke faster.

“Was I scary when I got angry? I thought it was okay.”

Hayden admitted it smoothly.

“I thought even if I could grab you by getting the upper hand, that would be enough for me. I am trash. Well done.”

He had such thoughts. He had never thought such things about Rue, but he did. The monsters that had rushed in were cleaned up once, and in the distance, lightning struck wildly. It seemed like Hayden’s anger and self-loathing mingled emotions.

Rue looked at the cursed ones coming back this way, avoiding the monsters, and stared at Hayden. A large and warm hand wiped her wet cheek. Trash, he said. Rue shook her head. She had never thought of him that way.

“…I didn’t even ask for more.”

Looking at the face he had tried not to forget for an unimaginable amount of time, he muttered gloomily.

“Just being by my side is enough…”
There’s no way. That couldn’t happen. You see it, and you want to touch it. When you touch it, you want your hearts to connect. Saying that just being by your side is enough is nonsense.

“You make me so miserable, Rue.”

He laughed.

“Even when I’m angry, it’s more heartbreaking when you read my mind. It’s frustrating, painful, and makes me even angrier.”

It was too frustrating to be seen as an incompetent guy, but at the same time, it was thrilling that Rue was so worried about him.

But in the end, he left, so he got angry again. Later, looking at him to see if he might leave, he got more upset. Continuously, he kept tightening his grip around Rue’s neck.

“I never thought I could be angry with you. Even though something that could never happen to me happened, and you really made me miserable, I can’t help it. But still, I like you too much.”

So, it was miserable. Tears flowed incessantly from her eyes in his hands, and even sobbing sounds came out. Hayden laughed.

“It’s okay to be miserable.”

That was too obvious for him. So, being miserable didn’t matter in the end.

“I said this is my bottom. I was a person here, but now I’ve torn apart those who are no longer people, fought against those monsters, and endured many times I don’t remember. There’s nothing left to hide from you, nothing left unsaid.”

He showed everything, even what he didn’t want to show, and there was only one thing he wished for her. Hayden thought he might have already obtained it. His hands were already soaked, and the crying sounds from the embrace began to subside.

“Please.”

He hugged her unknowingly, kissed her forehead, and whispered. He only realized that he had done such actions after kissing. To him, Rue was that kind of person. His hands naturally went, his eyes naturally went, and he could only press his lips.

“I’ve only been thinking about you and enduring here. I’ve been searching and checking the newcomers every day, afraid that you might come earlier than I leave, behind these new curses.”

There was only one crazy person inside this silent barrier. It felt like holding his breath every time a new curse emerged.

“I kept checking even when I went outside the barrier. Whether you’re alive, whether you’re clinging to life, whether you’re okay.”