Even when working at the bead factory, Eloise habitually wondered if time could pass this slowly.

But after returning to Maybury, she finally realized something.

Compared to the leisurely daily life here, the factory clock was spinning as fast as a cogwheel.

Since returning home, Eloise completely let go of her sense of time.

It was hard to believe that it had already been a month since she returned.

The splendid summer would soon come to an end.

The busy daily life in the capital, the characteristic cloudy skies and summer rain, the bustling square, and the nights of falling asleep exhausted all felt like an illusion.

However, the seasons here left just as slowly as they arrived.

So there was no need to feel sad about the fading summer just yet.

Now there was no reason to, anyway.

“Yawn…”

Eloise, with her abundant hair loosely braided long enough to cover her shoulders, yawned lazily.

She had just finished a simple breakfast and lunch on the first floor and returned to her room to lie down on the bed.

In other words, a lazy daily life not much different from Mrs. Mullitch’s cat.

To trace the reason for this solidified lifestyle, one needed to look back to the night Eloise returned to Maybury.

In other words, a month ago, when she had just returned from the capital, there were still traces of a cold. More accurately, she was close to a state of exhaustion.

For that reason, Eloise received meticulous care from everyone in this house for a while.

Family members took turns coming to feel her forehead, Mrs. Hurst bathed her like a young child, and the cook, Mr. Mitchell, put Eloise’s favorite foods on the table.

Even so, Eloise herself must have been the one having the hardest time, but she tried to show a bright face to everyone instead of a tired one.

After spending a few days like that, the unseasonable chills gradually subsided, and the fatigue that had been weighing down every cell in her body improved little by little.

Nevertheless, Eloise had not gone to church even once in the past month.

She didn’t feel like it even after seeing her elder sister, the protagonist of the broken engagement, faithfully attending services every week.

It was unlike her, who enjoyed going out with family and engaging in small talk with people.

The Bailey couple, while finding it unusual, did not urge Eloise to go to church.

The couple, who had been naturally turning a blind eye to everything related to it since the long-awaited marriage of their eldest daughter fell through, did not want to associate the reason for Eloise’s change with the broken engagement.

Above all, whatever the reason, it was clear that Eloise had been unprecedentedly gloomy before leaving for the capital, wasn’t it?

Eloise, who had said she would shake off all her sorrows in the vast Brightnam, returned in tatters after staying there for less than a month.

Seeing their daughter again after about a month with a haggard face from days of starvation and swollen eyes, the couple could not help but be shocked.

It took some time, but how fortunate it was that she had safely returned to her original appearance, at least on the outside.

But Eloise still could not leave her bed.

When she had to wash up or at mealtimes, she had no choice but to go down to the first floor, but even then, she often skipped breakfast.

It was because she was suffering from chronic lethargy on top of sleeping an abnormally long time.

“It’s a bit severe today…”

It couldn’t be spring fatigue in late summer, not spring.

Then was it because of her mood? It wasn’t a cold, and it definitely wasn’t overwork, but sometimes the dizziness was so severe that it was hard to get out of bed.

Today was one of those days.

“On days like this, I wouldn’t be able to go to church even if I wanted to.”

Eloise, who muttered softly, closed her eyes while lying on her side on the bed. Then, a faint bird sound was heard from the distant sky.

The sound of the wind shaking the trees was also heard more clearly. She had a feeling that it would be an exceptionally long day.

‘Since when did Maybury, where I’ve lived my whole life, suddenly start to feel boring and tedious…?’

Eloise, lost in thought for a moment, realized that it was a few years ago.

The reason for it was also very clear, but she decided not to dwell on it.

But she didn’t know that this unsurprisingly boring peace would become even more burdensome after a brief visit to the capital.

Even so, she had only been away for about a month.

‘Is it the effect of working busy all day at the factory?’

To say that the capital life suited her constitution, she often revealed that she was a stranger wherever she went due to her own naivety.

To say that she missed the scenery of the capital, the streets were full of trash and fat pigeons everywhere, the weather was happy enough to be sunny only once in a while, and there were enough annoying people like Mrs. Pullum to fill the streets.

It was a place that was not lovely in many ways, a place with no memories, so why did she want to go back? As if she had left something important there…

Eloise curled up weakly.

“…I want to think about something else.”

At times like this, when it was boring, and especially when she didn’t even have the energy to take a walk outside, there was nothing better than writing in a diary.

Eloise tried not to forget to sit in front of her diary on special days.

She liked writing in her diary because it seemed to organize her thoughts, and she liked it because it seemed to make her mind calmer and deeper.

It felt like she was getting closer to being an adult.

The problem was that she had left her diary at Mrs. Mullitch’s house in a hurry to leave without even packing her luggage.

The pretty and soft diary covered in faded brown leather was a lifelong treasure that had been with her since girlhood.

It was so precious that any special moment seemed to quickly lose its luster if not written in it.

Coincidentally, many of Eloise’s special days were in the summer. Some days, even without anything significant happening, she filled a whole page.

Not because anything extraordinary happened, but simply because of the presence of someone who was with her.

When her thoughts reached that point, Eloise somehow felt distressed.

“Hmm… I think I did well to leave it behind after all.”

Even if she were to write in her diary now, it was obvious what story she would write.

The voice that lingered in her ears and did not leave that night as she ran to take the carriage, all the way back to Longfield, and even after returning home was the proof.

Even if she tried not to think about it, whenever Eloise closed her eyes, she invariably returned to that night.

‘I love you.’

Was it because of the rain that his quiet confession resonated so deeply?

Remembering that unbelievable resonance made her toes tingle.

‘I am in love with you, Eloise.’

Ansel Blaine said with an endlessly flawless face despite being drenched in rain. From the beginning until now, he had only loved her.

Eloise could clearly pinpoint when that beginning referred to.

If the coachman who took the wrong way to Longfield on his first visit in the summer had not stopped the carriage to ask for the location of the mansion, many things would have certainly been different.

It would have been a completely different life from now.

Actually, there were many things she wanted to say that rainy night. Yes, she knew well who he loved.

His confession invaded her eyes, ears, and heart like a ruthless invader, leaving no escape and etching itself in.

But if that confession was sincere, why did he treat only her elder sister specially? He was just kind to me like he was to anyone else and showed no particular interest.

What about when he was her elder sister’s fiancé and acted cold and overbearing when it was just the two of us in the house? Will he package that as because he loved me too?

Or was the words that he loved me from the beginning just a flowery phrase to shake me up that day?

“…That might be the case.”

A whisper like a sigh dispersed.

The eyes that spoke of love that day were definitely passionate, but to say that he loved me from the beginning, Eloise, who knew the weight of those words better than anyone else, somehow laughed hollowly.

‘Because marriage to me was not allowed, he tried to stay by my side even if it meant marrying my elder sister whom he didn’t love?’

Thinking about it again, she couldn’t help but think he was crazy.

Then what was it about holding a grand ball and inviting people right before the wedding? What on earth was he thinking…?

In fact, one of the reasons Eloise did not go to church was that she already guessed that people would be talking about the broken engagement as they pleased.

They probably couldn’t do it blatantly in front of her, but that uncomfortable atmosphere would not be hidden.

Imagining her elder sister enduring it silently despite knowing that made her heart feel like it was being crushed.

Her elder sister, who was always gentle and soft, would be the one wanting to hide from the commotion, so why was she gritting her teeth? Eloise knew very well.

Her elder sister was trying to protect the family even at a moment like this.

‘It would have been easier if she had just blamed everything on me.’

Remembering Sarah, who must have hated her but wiped away her tears instead of getting angry, Eloise’s throat naturally became hot.

Eloise took a deep breath while looking at the dim ceiling without turning on the light.

‘That’s how I tried to stay by your side.’

So this was all because of Ansel Blaine.

If he really loved her, he should have shown at least a little bit of his heart. Then she would not have been an accomplice in him making the worst choice.

But he gave no options and ended everything with his own arbitrary decision.

“That may have been your way, but…”

But she never thought he would do something so reckless.

That day, Ansel said he had given up everything to come. In other words, he had ruined even himself.

Then what would happen to that man now?

No matter how strict the family, he was their only son, so she thought they would forgive him, but after turning around, his desperate eyes and trembling lingered in her mind.

Ridiculously, she was worried about him.

‘Why do I have to feel guilty because of your selfish dogmatism?’

Eloise was disgusted with herself for feeling sorry for him at the same time as hating and resenting him.

So Eloise just hoped that her family who had gone to church would return soon.

Hurry back and drive away this silence. Please get me out of these painful thoughts soon.